Struggling with Masturbation

[sam4u]

Jesus said "My yoke is easy".



One Savior--Jesus Christ, One God--our creator God, One Command-- go and tell everyone, One law to follow-- the law of love (the whole law is fulfilled in one law-- the law of love), One heaven-Jesus when to prepare a place for us, One hell-- for non-believers, One heaven- for believer, One work to do--to trust in Christ.



Christ is the second Adam to make us a "new Creation" similar to Adam and Eve before the sin of the first Adam. "(as Adam before the sin, when Adam and Eve were 100% nude and with out any shame) We are 100% pure in Christ alone. All sins: pass, present, and future, Christ has paid for them all.



"To the pure ALL things are pure" titus 1:15. "All things are lawful to us" We don't have any list of laws (either in Old Testament or in the New) to follow, we are under one law only, the law of love.



In Christ we are as Adam and Eve were before they sinned. We only have one law, the law of love. The law of love judges our actions. If you have a sexual fantasy, then judge it on the law of love. Is it a loving fantasy? If yes, then it is ok. If it is unloving, unkind, then it is bad.



What list of laws did Adam and Eve have? Basically None! What list of sex rules did Adam and Eve have? Basically None! They were also basically under the law of love also with action toward others.



Christ is the second Adam to undo Adam and Eve sin. Christ paid the cost for 100% of our sins, so we are basically sinless before God, because of Christ. With only one rule.



Always ask yourself, " did Adam and Eve have this law?" Did they have this rule?



We don't have any list of rules or laws to follow. We only have one, the law of love. We are liberated in Christ to love others with no laws or rules, other then the law of love.



Legalism is picking a list of laws or rules and force people to follow them. We put hard yokes on people. We make major man made heavy load guilt trips on people. The Law of Love is our rule and law.



Even St Paul is very legalistic at times. Even church leaders want to put a heavy load of long list of rule on us. They go read some Bible verse and act like its another list of rule on us to follow with out thinking that we only have one rule.



"Don’t call unclean what God calls clean"(Acts 10 or 11) God call all things clean. This was a major reversal of the Old Testament rules. "All things are lawful to me"( 1 Cor 6:12 )"the whole law is fulfilled in: love God and love others as you love yourself."



Most people have a major misunderstand of the Gospels. Jesus lived under the law; age of grace did not come until after his death. Also Jesus and others spoke totally different to legalist non-follows, non-believes then how he spoke to believers. Much of the Sermon on the Mount after vs. 12 was spoken to legalistic, under law, non-believer who were trusting in the law to get them to heaven and not to Christians. You always have to ask yourself, "who is Jesus talking to?" non-believer or believer? This is very important. This misunderstanding has caused much legalism in Christianity and we have lost many freedoms in Christ and put heavy yokes on people.



Marriage they promote possessiveness and jealousy to rule and not love. Marriage is after the pagan Romans, the "Roman"tic love of one man, one women. Under Jewish rule they always had many wives and concubines and other sexual lovers both before and after marriage. Even God solution for David's Adultery was to go get as many women as he wanted, (2 Sam 12:8) just don't steal other men's wives or kill them to get their wives from them. God's solution was more wives not less or not just one will do you. 2 Samuel 12:8 I (God) gave you (David) his (Saul's) house and his (Saul’s) wives and the kingdoms of Israel and Judah. And if that had not been enough, I would have given you much, much more. That is as many women as you desire.



God designed every detail of our sexuality, our sexual fantasies, sexual lust, and our individual sex drive and God said it was very good.



God designed sexual lust, we did not. God built it into us to lust after sexual pleasures. God design it.



Lust is greatly misused and misunderstood by religion people. There is good healthy lust and bad lust. Sexuality is good lust. God built it in to the system. Animals are designed by God and their sexual also has built in program. Animal did not sin. Human nature was design by God. The only bad part is the "sin principal" part of it.



We are free in Christ and only have one law to follow the law of love.



One command to follow: to go and tell the world of God's love for them, that Jesus paid the penalty 100% of their sins and tell them about one law to follow, the law of love.



The whole law is fulfilled in this that you love your neighbor as you love yourself. God as the only creator God, there is no other.



If all these sex rules were that important then God would have given a long list of sex do's and don't rules to Adam and Eve to follow. He would not have waited hundreds of years and then come up with a list.



Most of the sex rule was to solve a special problem of the special time and special culture.



Sexual lovemaking is a wonderful way to show affectionate love to a person. This is a much deeper and personal love that the person can feel and enjoy and it meets an important love need we all have. Many people's love language is touch and physical loving touch and many don't real feel loved unless it connects to them or touches them physically.



The Bible says, "they will know us by our love". The deepest and most powerful love to most humans is sensual or sexual intimacy love making kind of love. Even the Bible talks of a "holy" kiss. Is this a passionate lovers kiss or just a good night kiss at the door?



Religion people want to put a very hard yoke on people and make lots of legalistic rule to create major man made guilt trip and over burden people with a heavy load of do's and don'ts and tell them that their God designed love making sex drive is evil. This is not true.

We have freedom in Christ to love everyone. The true will set you free. We are free. Enjoy your freedom.

Before a person finds a Bible Verse that hinds that we are suppose to be unloving, then show them these love verses.

Don't major on the minor. Major on the major (love) and everything is minor.

Jas 2:12 - So whenever you speak, or whatever you do, remember that you will be judged by the law of love, the law that set you free.

Micah 6:8 The Lord has told you, human, what is good; he has told you what he wants from you: to do what is right to other people, love being kind to others, and live humbly, obeying your God.



Ge 1:31 - Then God saw everything that He had made, and indeed it was very good. ...(Note: God designed our human nature, every detail of our natural sexuality, and said it was all very good. The only bad part of us is what we added, the "sin principal" part.)



Ro 13:8 Owe no man any thing, but to love one another: for he that loveth another hath fulfilled the law.

titus 1:15 Unto the pure all things are pure: but unto them that are defiled and unbelieving is nothing pure; but even their mind and conscience is defiled.



Ro 14:20 - For meat destroy not the work of God. All things indeed are pure; but it is evil for that man who eateth with offence.

1Co 10:23 – All things are lawful for me, but all things are not expedient: all things are lawful for me, but all things edify not.



2Co 5:17 - Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new.

Ga 6:15 - For in Christ Jesus neither circumcision nor uncircumcision avails anything, but a new creation.



Acts 10:13 Then a voice said to Peter, "Get up, Peter; kill and eat." 14 But Peter said, "No, Lord! I have never eaten food that is unholy or unclean." 15 But the voice said to him again, "God has made these things clean so don't call them 'unholy'!" 16 This happened three times

(Note: this was not only about food, but almost everything.)

Ga 5:14 - For all the law is fulfilled in one word, even in this: "You shall love your neighbor as yourself."

2Jo 1:6 - Love means doing what God has commanded us, and he has commanded us to love one another, just as you heard from the beginning.

1Co 14:1 - Let love be your highest goal, but also desire the special abilities the Spirit gives, especially the gift of prophecy.

Ro 13:9 - For the commandments against adultery and murder and stealing and coveting – and any other commandment – are all summed up in this one commandment: "Love your neighbor as yourself."

Ac 20:24 -But my life is worth nothing unless I use it for doing the work assigned me by the Lord Jesus – the work of telling others the Good News about God's wonderful kindness and love.

Ro 12:10 -Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other.

Ga 5:13 - For you have been called to live in freedom – not freedom to satisfy your sinful nature, but freedom to serve one another in love.

Note: this is the "sin principal" part of us. Being unloving, unkind, unforgiving, unthankful, being mean, selfish, rude, etc opposite of 1 Cor 13. God designed the human nature and said it was very good. We added the "sin principal" part.

Joh 13:35 - Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples."

Ro 12:9 - Don't just pretend that you love others. Really love them. Hate what is wrong. Stand on the side of the good.

Ro 13:8 - Pay all your debts, except the debt of love for others. You can never finish paying that! If you love your neighbor, you will fulfill all the requirements of God's law.



Ro 13:10 - Love does no wrong to anyone, so love satisfies all of God's requirements.



1 Corinthians 13: 1 - 13



1 If I could speak in any language in heaven or on earth but didn't love others, I would only be making meaningless noise like a loud gong or a clanging cymbal.

2 If I had the gift of prophecy, and if I knew all the mysteries of the future and knew everything about everything, but didn't love others, what good would I be? And if I had the gift of faith so that I could speak to a mountain and make it move, without love I would be no good to anybody.



12 Now we see things imperfectly as in a poor mirror, but then we will see everything with perfect clarity. All that I know now is partial and incomplete, but then I will know everything completely, just as God knows me now.

13 There are three things that will endure – faith, hope, and love – and the greatest of these is love.

1Co 16:14 - And everything you do must be done with love.

1Co 16:20 - All the brethren greet you. Greet ye one another with an holy kiss.

Gal 5:14 - For the whole law can be summed up in this one command: "Love your neighbor as yourself."

 

[tennyson]

Allow me to be very open with you guys (about myself)

I struggeled with the "M" word very much myself. I felt extremely guilty when I did it. I felt that I could not pray - nothing.

For about 7 years I had a battle. It did it practically every day. I really wanted to stop.

Finally I received help from a counsellor who is both a pastor and physician (medical doctor).

He gave me some advice and prayed for me. This helped a lot, but then it did not stop immediatetly. I felt too ashame to go back to him and tell him that "i've done it again".

I had to force mysle fot go back to him, over and over again. (I knew that this was my only hope - and I know he helped many others).

Slowly but surely it decreased to such an extend that I can say I am free today.

Do try this route.

It worked for me - it can work for you!

NS: get someone who you can trust and that knows God!

 

[LovinGod]

I am praying for you, and I also recommend the site http://www.settingcaptivesfree.com/course

That site is It's a 60-day online course that aims to help people get over sexual addictions by turning their focus towards God.

I want to also encourage you to enroll in the Setting Captives Free program. This course has lead me to seek deliverance from God in the area of inappropriate contentography, masturbation, and other forms of sexual impurity. 7 months ago, I couldn't remember a single day where I didn't touch or look at inappropriate content. It's been 7 months (since Day 1 of the course) masturbation and inappropriate content free. Only by the grace of God!!

I have learned that my sexuality is a beautiful gift from God. As a single woman, I have the incredible blessing of allowing the Lord to fulfill those desires in me without turning to sin. I am more satisfied now than I ever remember being.

God Bless.

 

[SoLaWaVe]

I have the same problem, accountability has helped me LOTS!



Find some one who knows about the power of the Holy Spirit in prayer, meet them regularly every week, tell them how you’re doing & receive prayer from them.



Its working for me, though' sometimes it gets hard...there is some improvement, just a matter of time.



Another thing is to get rid of everything that allows you to access inappropriate contentography, this is a must! Even if it means getting rid of the Internet, as I have done.

 

[Godschild]

I deal with it as well. And yes, for me it's extremely hard to resist temptation, and it's something that I have to do(resist it, that is). Because it starts off that I have the craving, and then after the craving, I do it, and it feels good, but then afterward, I feel *REALLY* guilty, like you wouldn't believe.

1 Corinthians 6

18Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body. 19Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own

That's a verse that I have to keep telling myself everytime, every moment and every day. It's gonna be hard, but I know you can do it.

Hopefully that helps.

Love you much!

 

[TheListener]

I deal with it as well. And yes, for me it's extremely hard to resist temptation, and it's something that I have to do(resist it, that is). Because it starts off that I have the craving, and then after the craving, I do it, and it feels good, but then afterward, I feel *REALLY* guilty, like you wouldn't believe.

That is exactly what I go through every day. But worse, AFTER I do it I also feel disconnected from any spirituality, I feel dirty like my prayers wont be answered, that God doesnt wanna know me... And because I struggle daily, and being a man it comes almost naturally, I feel disconnected almost 90 percent of the time.


There, I said it.

 

[victor128]

If someone doesn't struggle with lust, or stuggle with inappropriate contentography, or struggle with guilt, is it wrong for them to touch? Is all forms of masturbation evil? The thing with me is, I began to touch at the age of two. Somehow or another I discovered this secret on my own and I would regularly touch during naptimes, and sometimes when waking up or falling asleep. I never masturbated in public when I was little, for some reason I knew that was wrong and to only do it when no one was around, and I never got caught masturbating by anyone either. I enjoyed the sensation it gave me even as a little child. Eventually I learned I could do this in the bathtub, or in the shower, and as I got older I started to do it more often. I never knew what I was doing, nor why I did it and to myself, I called it 'playing with my penis'. And I wondered if other people played with there penis's and I wondered why it felt good. When I was as old as SEVENTEEN, I finally heard the word masturbation and didn't know what it was. I looked in an encyclopedia and it told me, and then I knew my secret activity is actually a common activity and I had a word for what I have done all my life. I've never looked at inappropriate contentography, I don't fantasize or anything, I just touch the same way I did when I first discovered it all by myself at the age of two. I have often tried to quit, no real reason for it, just to see if I could. I have found that thinking about not masturbating and going as long as you can without doing it, actually makes the temptation stronger, and it is pretty much impossible to quit. Anyways, is it actually a sin?

 

[bliz]

Not all Christians believe that mastrubation is a sin. I, for one, think that we have placed unecesary guilt and greif on a lot of people by making this an issue. Scripture does not discuss mastrubation at all, let alone declare it sin.

A no lesser "diety" than James Dobson, a Christian Psychologist, does not believe that it is, in and of itself, a sin. I think that this notion comes out of Christians having a hard time becoming comfortable with sexuality and sex, God given gifts.

 

[Dirtydeak]

Not all Christians believe that mastrubation is a sin. I, for one, think that we have placed unecesary guilt and greif on a lot of people by making this an issue. Scripture does not discuss mastrubation at all, let alone declare it sin.

A no lesser "diety" than James Dobson, a Christian Psychologist, does not believe that it is, in and of itself, a sin. I think that this notion comes out of Christians having a hard time becoming comfortable with sexuality and sex, God given gifts.

I guess that would depend on what sexual erotica, or paraphernalia you used to become aroused. What are you masterbating to? What is going through your mind or has gotten you aroused to the point of making a sexual act?

 

[SoLaWaVe]

Sex is for 1 on 1 when in marriage... the "M" word is a sin, as you think of lustful things or look at images that are inappropriate contentographic that cause you to lust... so there you go it is a Sin.

 

[argyleman]

Hi,
I have been trying to stop it for years but somehow I never make it longer than maybe 1 week. The thing is that it's not even certain wether it's a sin or not.
In most cases I don't have dirty fantasies. I get the urge to do it mostly when I'm depressed, it's a way to release tension.
Actually I wish I could just stop it but it doesn't work! After a few days I get the urge to do it and then I do it and then I feel bad and then the whole thing starts again.
I have tried to stop it so often somehow I cannot even imagine that I succeed one day and after all what does succeeding mean? Doing it never again? I doubt this is possible and imagine you have not done it for month and then you fall, then the chances are pretty good that you will fall again after a few days cause you are demoralized.
And I don't even know how to be free. I mean is it all down to my own will? Do I have to fight this fight and really fight the urge in my own strength? I don't think this works. I mean sometimes I win and do not do it but in most cases I simply give in.
And another really huge problem is that I often have really filthy dreams!
I dream of having sex with girls and when I wake up I have this stuff in my mind! That's like having watched a inappropriate contento! It affects you! When I dream such stuff then the chances are high that I touch the next day simply because I have this stuff in my head.
I don't like these dreams but what shall I do? I cannot do anything against them. I also do not watch inappropriate content. I mean it's not that I have never watched a inappropriate contento but I don't have this stuff at home and I do not watch it regularly, so inappropriate content is not a problem in my case.
But often 1 pic of a woman is enough to directly tempt me and when you surf on the internet you always see something filthy even when you're not looking for it.

 

[specialgirl]

Question: isn't rationalization the bigger problem and not just the sin itself?

 

[fashionably_lonely]

you aren't rationalizing something that's natural.. or you shouldnt have to. only false guilt causes this sort of problem.

 

[homewardbound]

The issue of masturbation and indulging in inappropriate contentography is one of the most difficult ones we as Christians deal with. The number of threads, posters, and opinions you find on this forum attests to that. I hope none of us tries to rationalize our behavior, but insteads examines it in an honest manner through prayer.

It pains me to know that there are people who consider masturbation and inappropriate contentography a normal, healthy activity and therefore never a sin. Likewise, it pains me to know there are people who consider it a sin under any circumstances. Like many of you, I struggled with masturbation for years, not to mention inappropriate content addiction. I still deal with the temptation from time to time. I have always frowned on masturbation, no doubt because of things I was taught as a boy, and I'll never condone inappropriate contentography (assuming it's only intent is to stimulate sexual appetites). But as I've come to grips with my own struggles, I think there are instances where masturbation is permissable. The question of whether or not it's a sin is, what is the intent? That's where we, as Christians, walk a fine line. While the bible doesn't expressly say anything about it, it clearly warns us to avoid indulging our lustful desires (at least those that aren't aimed at our spouse). I finally reached a point I could no longer permit myself to indulge in fantasies and desires that weren't solely focused on my wife, partly because it impacted my marriage, but mostly because it separated me from God. I want a close, personal relationship with Him, and anything that stands in the way of that has to be dealt with. So, for me, it was very clear that masturbation, when used as a means of gaining sexual satisfaction through fantasies about other women, was off limits.

God created us as sexual beings, and I consider sex to be true gift from Him. My sincerest hope is that as each of us deals with his/her own sexuality, we include God in our decisions about how we choose to behave.

 

[homewardbound]

I hope none of us are rationalizing our behavior, but instead set our standards based on God's word, and daily prayer.

Like many of you here, I've struggled with masturbation for years, not to mention inappropriate content addiction. I used to frown on masturbation, no doubt due to things I was taught as a boy, and I'll never condone inappropriate contentography (assuming we define it as explicit material that is intended to stimulate sexual appetites). But as I've come to grips with my own struggles, I think there are instances, albeit relatively infrequent, where masturbation is permissible. While the bible doesn't expressly address it, I think it's clear that we are warned not to indulge in lustful desires. That's where we as Christians walk a fine line. Isn't the question of whether or not it's a sin to touch boil down to intent? If masturbation is used as a way to fulfill sexual desires through fantasies and lusts for someone other than your spouse, it's hard for me to believe God would approve.

In dealing with this issue, I finally reached the point where masturbation in general, and inappropriate content specifically, was separating me from God. It also affected my marriage to a degree, but the separation from God was agonizing. That's why I don't consider masturbation in and of itself to be a sin, but if it's used to satisfy my lusts, then it's off limits.

God made us all sexual beings, and I think sex is a true gift. I truly hope that as we each decide how to deal with our sexuality, we include God in any decisions we make about our behavior.

 

[Dirtydeak]

I hope none of us are rationalizing our behavior, but instead set our standards based on God's word, and daily prayer.

Like many of you here, I've struggled with masturbation for years, not to mention inappropriate content addiction. I used to frown on masturbation, no doubt due to things I was taught as a boy, and I'll never condone inappropriate contentography (assuming we define it as explicit material that is intended to stimulate sexual appetites). But as I've come to grips with my own struggles, I think there are instances, albeit relatively infrequent, where masturbation is permissible. While the bible doesn't expressly address it, I think it's clear that we are warned not to indulge in lustful desires. That's where we as Christians walk a fine line. Isn't the question of whether or not it's a sin to touch boil down to intent? If masturbation is used as a way to fulfill sexual desires through fantasies and lusts for someone other than your spouse, it's hard for me to believe God would approve.

In dealing with this issue, I finally reached the point where masturbation in general, and inappropriate content specifically, was separating me from God. It also affected my marriage to a degree, but the separation from God was agonizing. That's why I don't consider masturbation in and of itself to be a sin, but if it's used to satisfy my lusts, then it's off limits.

God made us all sexual beings, and I think sex is a true gift. I truly hope that as we each decide how to deal with our sexuality, we include God in any decisions we make about our behavior.

Way to go. Agreed compleatly. Im sending you a blessing brother....:crosself:

 

[Staind]

I think to stop you first have to get rid of the inappropriate content, even if you have to touch while trying to stop looking at inappropriate content it's OK for now. Then move on to things that may sexually stimulate you, specifically certain situations. Once those are out of the way (obviously they can't be totally out of the way) then I would work on masturbation. It has to come on steps, most men just can't stop masturbating completely.

Good luck, and I will pray that you accomplish your goal.

 

[tomodell]

I'm praying for you dude.

 

[crashedman]

Hello everyone,
About 2 weeks ago now I was at Centrifuge praising God and thinking maybe this time I will finally not be able to do this sin agian but it happened. Masturbation has took control of me I hate it sooo bad, also inappropriate content hurts the problem also. All i'm asking for is some prayer.

Hi,

First of all, masturbation is not talked about as a sin in the Bible as such, although I do not consider it to be something that should be done anywhere, anytime. What is important for you to do is to replace inappropriate contentography with imagery that is beautiful and appealing to God. This is very hard in today's world, especially because we have come to associate the human body simply with sex and sex-related activities.

I would concur with the others on here that masturbation is not something which you can just give up. You would do well to look at activities and places that aren't sexually inspiring and just behave yourself.

I'm not so much concerned about the fact that you touch, as much as I fear that you will get the urge to do it in an inappropriate place and get yourself into a lot of trouble over it.

As for your addiction to inappropriate contentography, I can understand where you are coming from as I have had similar problems in the past.

The desire to view inappropriate content can turn you from the simple videos of the beautiful buxom Playboy girls to stuff that glorifies some of the worst forms of sexual sin and debauchery out there - be it rape, inappropriate behavior with animals, orgies, anal sex, and also child inappropriate contentography.

Since I gave up my desire to watch inappropriate content for the Lord, I have found myself becoming a more honest, gentle and conscientous person. I pray that you will be able to exercise more self-control and look after your body and your mind.


Crashedman

 

[herev]

Hi,

First of all, masturbation is not talked about as a sin in the Bible as such, although I do not consider it to be something that should be done anywhere, anytime. What is important for you to do is to replace inappropriate contentography with imagery that is beautiful and appealing to God. This is very hard in today's world, especially because we have come to associate the human body simply with sex and sex-related activities.

I would concur with the others on here that masturbation is not something which you can just give up. You would do well to look at activities and places that aren't sexually inspiring and just behave yourself.

I'm not so much concerned about the fact that you touch, as much as I fear that you will get the urge to do it in an inappropriate place and get yourself into a lot of trouble over it.

As for your addiction to inappropriate contentography, I can understand where you are coming from as I have had similar problems in the past.

The desire to view inappropriate content can turn you from the simple videos of the beautiful buxom Playboy girls to stuff that glorifies some of the worst forms of sexual sin and debauchery out there - be it rape, inappropriate behavior with animals, orgies, anal sex, and also child inappropriate contentography.

Since I gave up my desire to watch inappropriate content for the Lord, I have found myself becoming a more honest, gentle and conscientous person. I pray that you will be able to exercise more self-control and look after your body and your mind.


Crashedman

excellent post--I agree completely