Struggling with blasphemous thoughts

[SeekerOfTruth365]

It's hard to explain.. okay so before all these started in March I was on fire for Jesus Christ for about a few weeks or so then these thoughts started popping up like ''how do you know God is truly good?'' at first they were bothersome and I didn't want to be convinced by them, but after a week passed I began to ponder on the thought and got convinced by it such that it shaped my beliefs; removing full Faith in Jesus Christ and starting to question my Faith.

The thought though, is irrational and despite knowing that I can't seem to get my mind off it, I try the hardest I can to force my mind into what I once believed (the Truth of the Gospel) but then it always backfires against me and ends up strengthening the irrational thought.

Then after awhile, it's like I sort of enjoy but don't enjoy these thoughts at the same time. It's like whenever the thought isn't around and I notice it my mind automatically brings back the thought JUST because I thought about it!! So basically the only way for me to not ponder over it is to not think about it at all, but it's really difficult.

The above example in Paragraph 1 was only an example of the thoughts I faced, there were many much more painful thoughts that I experienced. It's like, these thoughts have become a part of me and it's REALLY hard to separate myself from them, I always get angry at God and stuff now. I never imagined that I would become like this, the very person I was disgusted by.

I've read up and all the advice says give no attention to those thoughts, but how does one do that? The more I try to not give attention to them, the more they come back and it's really affecting my daily life.

Although I've felt like I didn't do very well, I'm pretty sure God is asking ''why are you not coming to me for help?'' my prayer life has been rather dead (not very active) and not been praying as much.

What do you all think though? I just don't understand why I'm behaving like this, is it just a bad habit of mine, anxiety, spiritual attack or all 3? Please help

 

[jacksknight]

The problems you are having seem to be quite common. Think of it as being like a hypochondriac. Constantly thinking they have a tumor or a sickness of some kind. Just because they think it doesn't make it true. You need to keep praying, just talk to God and tell him whats actually on your heart. Be straight honest, he already knows everything anyway. When you don't feel like praying that's when you need to pray the most.

It might feel like you are praying up against a concrete sky, but God hears your prayers. Check out Acts chapter 10. God sends and angel to Cornelius who had a faith in God, but didn't yet know the way of salvation. This is what the angel said to him..

"Thy prayers and thine alms are come up for a memorial before God."

You see, somewhere in heaven there is a memorial with your name on it. And every time you pray it gets bigger, until God takes notice of it. Then God will send angels from heaven to drive back anything that stands in your way. God cannot and will not fail you. God loves you, you have to actually learn that. I know everyone says they know it, but you have to actually KNOW it.

Put a prayer request up on here so others will see, that way you will get some people praying for you. We are here for you!! Prayers on the way!

 

[Goatee]

As you draw near to God, so will the devil try to pull you away from God!

 

[Kit Sigmon]

Good question, why you not seeking God? why keep yourself turned away from him and the bible?
http://www.gotquestions.org/negative-thinking.html
http://www.gotquestions.org/take-control-thoughts.html
http://www.whatchristianswanttoknow.com/spiritual-attacks-putting-on-the-armor-of-god/

 

[Goodbook]

Read the bible more, every day if you can, so you can renew your mind with His word, then you'll have scripture to counter those attacks and negative thoughts. Its what Jesus did when Satan tried to tempt him in the wilderness. JEsus quoted from deuteronomy, said 'it is written' and Satan went away.

 

[tturt]

agree with Goodbook on this one.

Have your response ready - when the doubt comes, immediately respond with Scripture. I've learned to Say "... It is written, Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceedeth out of the mouth of God." "Then saith Jesus unto him, Get thee hence, Satan:" Matt 4
If it tries to continue, say more Scripture such as Psa 145 Or call out to Yeshua. Encouraging you to continue to rely on Yahweh and His Word.

 

[mytel]

I also agree with Goodbook and tturt, daily reading of the Bible can help to equip you with scripture in those times.

I can relate to you, I know it is hard but I think you really just have to decide to not listen to those thoughts. Instead of engaging with those thoughts in any way, spend no time on them. I would say when you realise you are having those thoughts immediately just turn to God and affirm the truth in your mind. Turn from them, think of something else, resist them and they will flee.

 

[shelley1952]

Has anyone noticed that a lot of posts are kind of running along the same lines, its because it is a spiritual attack. Satan is already a defeated doe, he knows it but he depends on the fact that most Christians dont know it. He has studied Christians for thousands of years and he knows our weaknesses better than we do and he cant make us do anything so he uses what he can and that is our thoughts. A person has to learn what the weapons are that God has given every born again believer and everything is in the text manual given to us which is the Bible, now we do not know what to do if we do not study His Word just like being in school. You didnt learn your ABCs, numbers, math, science and so on if you didnt study your books well its the same way with the Bible, you have to not just read but study and while we are at it the best thing is to get to know Jesus, one on one, just you and Him in the privacy of your home. This will help stay your mind on Him, learn His voice, let Him help direct your thoughts.
Rom 12:2 Do not conform yourselves to the standards of this world, but let God transform you inwardly by a complete change of your mind. Then you will be able to know the will of God---what is good and is pleasing to him and is perfect.

John 14:6 Jesus answered him, "I am the way, the truth, and the life; no one goes to the Father except by me.

Mat 12:30 "Anyone who is not for me is really against me; anyone who does not help me gather is really scattering.

Now here is some thoughts to also put in mind, these are simple
there are only two forces in this world
God or Satan
good or evil
heaven or hell
now think on these, you can only make one choice, there is no middle. Either you are for God or against Him, again there is no middle ground. You need to be getting your thoughts right...........
2Co 10:4 The weapons we use in our fight are not the world's weapons but God's powerful weapons, which we use to destroy strongholds. We destroy false arguments;
2Co 10:5 we pull down every proud obstacle that is raised against the knowledge of God; we take every thought captive and make it obey Christ
Take your thoughts captive, we all have to do this, I have trained myself to react that as soon as an evil thought starts trying to come to my mind to recognize it and cast it from my mind before it takes hold. It takes a relationship with the Lord, if you develope that love between you and the Lord and like any love of your life you will want to please Him and honor Him. God bless you in your journey

 

[insurchoftruth]

What matter is not if some thought come in your mind, but if you accommodate and agree with those thoughts. If you are a born again christian, you will be reading the Word of God, and that will renew your mind, and make you think, like God thinks. As much as you do not agree with those negative thoughts in your mind, and you ignore them and do not let them make you say or do things, then that is ok. Just replace them with what the Word of God says. The Bible also commands us to take every thought captive for Christ. That means, we must control and decide to think, what God has said in his Word.

 

[Lybrah]

It's hard to explain.. okay so before all these started in March I was on fire for Jesus Christ for about a few weeks or so then these thoughts started popping up like ''how do you know God is truly good?'' at first they were bothersome and I didn't want to be convinced by them, but after a week passed I began to ponder on the thought and got convinced by it such that it shaped my beliefs; removing full Faith in Jesus Christ and starting to question my Faith.

The thought though, is irrational and despite knowing that I can't seem to get my mind off it, I try the hardest I can to force my mind into what I once believed (the Truth of the Gospel) but then it always backfires against me and ends up strengthening the irrational thought.

Then after awhile, it's like I sort of enjoy but don't enjoy these thoughts at the same time. It's like whenever the thought isn't around and I notice it my mind automatically brings back the thought JUST because I thought about it!! So basically the only way for me to not ponder over it is to not think about it at all, but it's really difficult.

The above example in Paragraph 1 was only an example of the thoughts I faced, there were many much more painful thoughts that I experienced. It's like, these thoughts have become a part of me and it's REALLY hard to separate myself from them, I always get angry at God and stuff now. I never imagined that I would become like this, the very person I was disgusted by.

I've read up and all the advice says give no attention to those thoughts, but how does one do that? The more I try to not give attention to them, the more they come back and it's really affecting my daily life.

Although I've felt like I didn't do very well, I'm pretty sure God is asking ''why are you not coming to me for help?'' my prayer life has been rather dead (not very active) and not been praying as much.

What do you all think though? I just don't understand why I'm behaving like this, is it just a bad habit of mine, anxiety, spiritual attack or all 3? Please help

You are seriously under attack! You should find some people to pray with you and for you. Also, read the passage about putting on the armor of God and keep each thought captive.

 

[shortygreyhere]

agree with Goodbook on this one.

Have your response ready - when the doubt comes, immediately respond with Scripture. I've learned to Say "... It is written, Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceedeth out of the mouth of God." "Then saith Jesus unto him, Get thee hence, Satan:" Matt 4
If it tries to continue, say more Scripture such as Psa 145 Or call out to Yeshua. Encouraging you to continue to rely on Yahweh and His Word.

I agree with Goodbook and tturt. Immediately turn your mind to scripture and make no room for these lies to be repeated. To do this, you should have a few scriptures memorized--especially about God's truth, His Goodness, and any other area of deception and attack. You turn get rid of darkness (lies) by turning on the light (scripture). Since it is very hard to hold two thoughts simultaneously, you will be able to get victory by speaking against this with the word. Along with the scripture, you could also say a prayer like, "Lord Jesus Christ, Son of the Living God, have mercy on me a sinner." Then make sure you get as much scripture through your eyes and ears into your mind as you possibly can.

The other thing I suggest is that you watch some Youtube videos by Ravi Zacharias (which will also lead you to some other great apologists like John Lennox and William Lane Craig). He has a ministry to non-believers and defends the Christian faith through apologetics. The answers to your questions are out there. God created 100 billion galaxies, each with 100 billion stars. Truly His ways are higher than our ways, and yet, Jesus Himself told us to love the Lord our God with all our mind in Matthew 22:37. There are many brilliant thinkers who have learned to love God with all their minds and you can too. I think that once you have your questions answered to your satisfaction, much of this struggle will be behind you because your thoughts will be replaced by the truth. I truly believe that a Christian can enjoy the truthful discoveries of science much more than a non-believer because we can see the beauty, truth, glory, and love that reflects who God is and it causes the soul to worship.

With all gentleness and kindness, it sounds like there is an element where you may need to ask forgiveness and repent based on what you wrote, "Then after awhile, it's like I sort of enjoy but don't enjoy these thoughts at the same time." I find it very helpful to tell God that I am sorry and that I don't want to do this anymore, but that I am weak in myself to change. I tell Him that to the best of my ability, I want to repent and be different, and I ask Him to meet me where I am weak and to help me and make up the difference where I am lacking. Then I need to fight and not give in when temptations come my way and I need to continue to seek God's sustaining power to help me in my weakness.

Please be aware that if your mind gets all the answers you seek, but your heart does not desire to bow its metaphorical knee to Jesus and say, "not my will, but thy will be done," you will only find yourself in a worse condition. Please ask God to grant you a willing heart and please be careful of the deceitfulness of sin. The heart is deceitfully wicked above all things and sin causes deceit and unbelief. Please ask God to help you desire to live a holy life. (and believe me, I am preaching to myself also!)