Struggles With homosexuality

[ProtectMySteps]

Hi.

I struggle with homosexuality. It's a really weird situation, it's possibly because of childhood memories, but I have homosexual attraction to older men.

I know I am now homosexual, I have no emotional or anything like that feelings for men, only sexual attractions, and I don't have homosexual attraction to men in my age, only older.

I'm trying to resist everytime it comes, but sometimes I have big struggles, and I become really scared that I am homosexual.

Actually I am not attracted to persons, I am attracted to masculinity. And I know I can't be homosexual, I have attractions to woman too, not only sexual but emotional too.

Please if you have some advice tell me, I really really really hope one day I'll have a wife and all of these evil attractions will stop.

I'd appreciate some prayers, I'm really lost now.

 

[grandvizier1006]

I can relate to this although it's not quite the same for me. I have a terrible habit of pleasuring myself to men, usually athletes or celebrities which often pose nude because it gets them famous, even though I am attracted to women sexually--And the athletes and celebrities among them so the same thing, and even more often! I think the issue is that I have a low-image of myself. I am "not a man", so I have to look elsewhere to find a "real man". I envy the perfect bodies I've been told they have.

All of this, for me, came from looking at dirty images. But for you, it might have just seemingly come out of nowhere. Simply don't give it much weight in your everyday life. Keep living your life and don't feel bad for being attracted to older men. Simply avoid having sex with them and you will be following God

 

[1watchman]

As you said: you are attracted to masculinity, not sex. That is not homosexuality, but more likely a feeling of less masculine ---lots of men have that! Continue to honor God and trust the Lord Jesus to keep you and lead you on through life. Keep your mind centered on Him and you will do well (as 2 Cor. 10:5).

 

[KayJoy]

Hi.

I struggle with homosexuality. It's a really weird situation, it's possibly because of childhood memories, but I have homosexual attraction to older men.

I know I am now homosexual, I have no emotional or anything like that feelings for men, only sexual attractions, and I don't have homosexual attraction to men in my age, only older.

I'm trying to resist everytime it comes, but sometimes I have big struggles, and I become really scared that I am homosexual.

Actually I am not attracted to persons, I am attracted to masculinity. And I know I can't be homosexual, I have attractions to woman too, not only sexual but emotional too.

Please if you have some advice tell me, I really really really hope one day I'll have a wife and all of these evil attractions will stop.

I'd appreciate some prayers, I'm really lost now.

Hi, I really hope you're around to read replies. I'm wondering how you're doing.

I have some things I'd like to ask... and then share from my own experience. Feel free to answer or not, or write me privately if you want.

First, some questions.... are you a survivor of childhood abuse? More specifically, have you ever experienced s*xual abuse in your childhood? Or... was your personal space not respected, no privacy, etc ... as a child?

Have you ever heard of "body memories" ... or phrase, "the body remembers"? I'm going somewhere with this. When I learned about this (after seeking answers from the Lord), it gave me so much relief!!

Second, some about myself.... I am a woman in my 40's... a mother of 5 children, married to my husband for 23 years. I am also someone who had experienced what you describe here (except the opposite, being I'm a woman). In my teens, I began to notice that when I was around this one older woman, my body reacted s*xually. It bothered me greatly!! And yet, I was not, and am not homosexual. I didn't understand it then, and I was saved only about a year or 2.

I was severely abused in my childhood from a very early age.... much of it was s*xual abuse. My body learned that closeness = s*x ...love = s*x ...caring = s*x .... you get the idea. I had huge, thick walls all my life and did not allow people near me (emotionally or physically) if I could control it. It was automatic, a way to self-protect. But when I found someone I felt I could trust, my walls began to come down, and boom! When I allowed that person close to me emotionally, and physically (she was like an older sister to me), to my horror and disgust, my body reacted s*xually. Well... later, after more and more memories of trauma and abuse came pouring back, I sought God for answers to these things (and more) .... and I learned that my body was only doing what it learned during all those years of childhood. I was s*xually abused by both genders... my personal space was never mine to control ... when certain people came close to me, it was always s*xual .... so I learned from early on, that closeness and "love" meant.... s*x.

Does any of this help? I sure hope so! I've had to unlearn many things, and relearn what good/normal/safe love looks, acts, and feels like. For the longest time, if anyone even said "I love you" in a genuine way, it would send me into a panic... not knowing what in the world to DO with it!! ....nausea, migraines, etc ... just because someone said "the L-word." I'm free now, from those lies... because when you ask God for His truth, it sets you free!!

Blessings to you and I hope you're doing well... praying for you today!

 

[Thrash Metalhead]

I've struggled with my sexuality too and I eventually came to terms with it. I feel like I can't change it and it what makes me, me.

 

[1watchman]

Very good insight, KayJoy! I hope others can gain from that. Look up always for God cares!

 

[AGODBELIEVERlove1stfaith2]

am praying for you brother

 

[ProtectMySteps]

Thank you everyone.

Now I have struggles again and I feel really bad.

 

[1watchman]

Well, dear friend, stay close to the Lord Jesus to find peace, and realize that Satan wants us to "feel really bad" and even blame God. The Lord can over time help you to minimize the thoughts and be a overcomer. Read 2 Cor. 10:5 and see if that encourages you to walk daily with the Lord Jesus.

 

[Jppeace]

Put the whole armor of God on, the belt of truth, the breast plate of righteousness, the helmet of salvation, the preparation of the gospel of peace upon your feet, the sword of the spirit, an the shield of faith, the name of the Lord is a strong tower the righteous runneth into it and are safe, his name is Jesus Christ an at the name of Jesus Christ every knee shall bow, it's good to read scripture an speak it over your life, here is great scripture , in all things I am more then a conqueror for greater is he who is in me then he who is in the world , Jesus will never leave me nor forsake me he loves me so much that he gave his life for me, by grace am I saved I was created in his likeness perfect in his image, all things work for the greater good of God, also test a spirit by a spirit, so when you feel under attack, you can say Jesus Christ is my Lord an saviour now if you are not Christ like you will flee from me under the full power an authority of Jesus Christ my Lord an saviour, talk to the holy spirit he will talk to you, stay blessed Jesus Christ is proud of you, let your heart not be troubled, peace be with you God bless