Could you give me some examples of what this process might look like? For example, if I am constantly jealous of other people and bitter about my negative life experiences, how do I get rid of that and get what is good?
Ok, I might be jealous that others are scheduled to preach where I go to church, but I am not asked to preach.
What helps me is I need to first not give in to that jealousy. I pray for God to make me able to resist it and not go along with it. Plus, I trust Jesus the Lord and Judge of all to manage if I am asked to teach or minister in this church. And submit for how God will guide me to do what He really wants. After all, if He really wants me to preach or teach here, He can easily open the doors.
And I find that God has me personally sharing with people, getting to know one another, and I can spot things to talk about with each person.
And there are people who will tell you not to compare yourself with anyone else, because you are God's unique masterpiece with unique things He wants to do with you.
And He will have us doing better than what others are doing, and what we might wish to do.
"I will not be brought under the power of any" > 1 Corinthians 6:12.
Do not let yourself be under the power of what you might want that someone else has.
"be content with such things as you have"(Hebrews 13:5)
I can be content with whatever I have in this church and with each person.
And even if no one listens to me, I can pray the way God has me pray, and my prayer can do more in a moment, than many worldly people have done in all their lifetimes combined.
Now, of course, if you are jealous because a genuinely Christian person is doing better than you, in marriage and other close relationships . . . find out what she does so you can do this, too.
And she could tell you she is not doing as great as it looks to you.
"'Do not judge according to appearance, but judge with righteous judgment.'" (John 7:24)
And she and others doing well in relationships could say how God's word says,
"Do all things without complaining and disputing," (Philippians 2:14)
We must keep seeking God to keep us from arguing and complaining. If we give in to such bad stuff, this can help keep us weak so we get in trouble in relating; and, by being weak to argue and complain, our weakness can make us able to give in to other nasty and hurtful stuff!
So likewise, while we stay weak for wrong pleasures and self-seeking interests, we also are weak so we can suffer various emotional problems.
Weakness for pleasure can also be weakness for pain!!
And Hebrews 12:4-14 guarantees that our God and Father is committed to giving us real correction, of our character.
I can be very vain, as a man . . . vain about beauty. And this can keep me weak so I can have personality problems . . . while women can be vain about other things, then wonder why they keep having their emotional issues. We all need to seek God first for His things - - - trust Him to have us grow and mature in Jesus.