Self Injury if you can help please do

[elahmine]

I started self harming at pretty young age. I remember <edit> at maybe seven and<edit>at maybe 11. It was a relatively long time when I stopped SI and became Christian (a few years ago). Now grant it, I used to cut so deep it left, not small scars, but large almost surgical sized scares. ( I say this because I have had other women say so. They sometimes compare to their C-section scars.) Well, I'm at it again except not near as bad. Some blisters some bleeding but nothing serious. I don't view my scars as embarrassing. I feel accomplished <edit>. (Once again, my current status is no worse than paper cuts.) I know I can't help the way I am. I may be able to stop cutting, but I will never stop feeling the way about SI, particularly cutting , the way I do. I'm going to therapy and all that, but I'm afraid to mention it. I don't want to go to a mental hospital. It won't help. It will only make things worse. I have a life to live, and I am mostly satisfied with my life. This isn't the place to mention it, but I'm pretty sure I've stopped believing in God. I was raised Christian but stopped believing at 11 the logic didn't make sense. I don't think I've ever really believed in things like miracles. Questions, thoughts, comments?

 

[Criada]

I'm sorry you've been dealing with this so long
It's not unusual to see self injury as ok - it's a coping strategy, and whilst it isn't a good one, it does help you cope. I think it's important to understand why you feel the need to do it, and to investigate other, healthier ways of dealing with the root issues. That can be done with a therapist, or on your own - personally I find it easier to have someone to talk to about it, but I know some people would rather not.

I don't think that any therapist will put you in hospital for it unless it is very extreme and you are endangering yourself

As for the faith issue - belief isn't logical really - but that doesn't make it any less real. I've struggled with doubt a lot, and had times when I couldn't believe - but somehow God has always drawn me back. If you can pray, keep praying- it does help, even if you doubt. I'm praying for you - take care of yourself, you really are worth it!

 

[elahmine]

I've been put in the hospital because I had some scratches and was agitated. I don't trust anyone anymore. I know belief is illogical, and that is the problem.

 

[justbeyourbestself]

I can't say SI is a good thing to do... But for some people, it helps them to release their emotion... I'm sorry that you've been struggling with this for a long time... But, I just want you to remember the people you love... Sometimes, it helps me to avoid doing SI.. I can understand about loss of faith... It also happened to me.. when anxiety and depression took my faith... But, He always gives us chance to get back to Him...

 

[elahmine]

I can't say SI is a good thing to do... But for some people, it helps them to release their emotion... I'm sorry that you've been struggling with this for a long time... But, I just want you to remember the people you love... Sometimes, it helps me to avoid doing SI.. I can understand about loss of faith... It also happened to me.. when anxiety and depression took my faith... But, He always gives us chance to get back to Him...

Well, I haven't self injured in awhile I think unless you count things that don't leave marks. I don't know if I believe in love. Well, I believe in love just not the unconditional kind. I'm having an especially bad day....