Second Time Over?

[ToxicBex]

I used to attend a church when I was younger, and I went through a bit of a difficult time, resulting in me not going to church anymore.

Now that I'm older, I would like to maybe explore the faith a little more, and maybe go to church again, to find out what I, myself, believe.

I work for a business ran by a church, which is upstairs from my work, and I'm thinking of going there. A lot of my collegues go there so that's good.

My one major concern is my sexuality. If people find out I'm gay (from one of my collegues or something), then how do I know that people won't judge me? I have no problem with being gay, in my day to day life, but I understand that being gay and religion doesn't always go together like...cheese and bread?

Do you think I should just go anyway? And if and when the time comes that people find out, then what should I do?

 

[GrayAngel]

The Bible is clear on its position on gay sex. But I can tell you're not here for a debate.

If you want to return to church with an open mind, then go ahead. But most churches frown on gay relations. But even if they try to be nice to you, they will not trust you as they would someone with Biblical morals.

So this is my advice, go to church, but do not tell anyone about your sexuality unless that person is someone you know you can trust (such as a pastor).

 

[Bryanfromiowa]

yes go anyway, i believe that our duty as christians is to stand against what we believe to be destructive or sinful lifestyles but to love the sinner above all. I may disagree with your lifestyle but that doesn't matter because I'm a sinner as well. Jesus said getting angry at a brother is the same as murder, lust the same as adultery, sin is sin in other words yours is no worse than mine. So go to church and if you don't feel loved and welcome or someone finds out about your homosexual lifestyle and tells you you are doomed leave and find another church.

 

[ephraimanesti]

MY DEAR SISTER,

i was struck by the statement at the bottom of your Post: "I WISH I WAS SPECIAL."

Are you REALLY so naively unaware of Who and What you are: i.e. The transendently beautiful, irreplacable, unreplicable, eternally unique, and infinitely-beloved daughter of an boundously LOVING God who has created all things--including you in all your unrecognized (by you!) radiant glory.

What's up with you, girl? Got your eyes closed?​

WITH LOVE IN CHRIST,
ephraim

P.S. Your self-applied appellation "ToxicBex" doesn't help much, either!

 

[[serious]]

you could try Unitarian universalist churches or United Church of Christ churches. They are open to LGBT members and visitors

 

[ToxicBex]

MY DEAR SISTER,

i was struck by the statement at the bottom of your Post: "I WISH I WAS SPECIAL."

Are you REALLY so naively unaware of Who and What you are: i.e. The transendently beautiful, irreplacable, unreplicable, eternally unique, and infinitely-beloved daughter of an boundously LOVING God who has created all things--including you in all your unrecognized (by you!) radiant glory.

What's up with you, girl? Got your eyes closed?​

WITH LOVE IN CHRIST,
ephraim

P.S. Your self-applied appellation "ToxicBex" doesn't help much, either!

Lol. Thank you for being so lovely, but I feel I need to explain this...

I only came back on the forum yesterday after having not been on here for a year or two...and haven't got round to changing the signiture. But thank you for your kind, kind words.

Thanks everyone else for the advice. I think I'm going to go along on Sunday, and see how it goes.

 

[Sketcher]

The way a good church should react to your sexuality is the same way it would react to any other sin habit. You don't toss people out just because they're gay. By the same token, you don't pretend that it isn't a sin either. Your being gay is simply one sin of many that you have, and you will be going to church with sinners of all stripes. We all fall short, and we're all saved by grace. A good church will recognize this.

 

[ephraimanesti]

Lol. Thank you for being so lovely, but I feel I need to explain this...

I only came back on the forum yesterday after having not been on here for a year or two...and haven't got round to changing the signiture. But thank you for your kind, kind words.

Thanks everyone else for the advice. I think I'm going to go along on Sunday, and see how it goes.

MY SISTER,

Open your eyes and

SEE YOURSELF AS ABBA SEES YOU, AND ALL OF YOUR QUESTIONS WILL BE ANSWERED AND 99.9% OF YOUR DIFFICULTIES SOLVED!​

Abba doesn't want tea--He wants thee!

IN CHRIST,
ephraim

 

[judechild]

First of all, congradulations! Your taking a major step!

You're from England, right? Are you an Angelican?

As a member of latin-rite Catholicism, I'd like to offer you to come check out the Catholic Church. I know you're nervious about being judged, and honestly I can't rule out the possibility of that wherever you go, but the Catholic Church does accept people with homosexual inclinations; she simply states that homosexual unions are not to be performed.

Here are the Caatechism of the Catholic Church paragraphs 2357 to 2359:

2357 "Homosexuality refers to relations between men or between women who experience an exclusive or predominant sexual attraction toward persons of the same sex. It has taken a great variety of forms through the centuries and in different cultures. Its psychological genesis remains largely unexplained. Bsing itself on Sacred Scripture, which presents homosexual acts as acts of grave depravity (Cf. Gen 19:1-29; Rom 1:24-27; 1 Cor 6:10; 1 Tim 1:10) tradition has always declared that "homosexual acts are intrinsically disordered." They are contrary to the natural law. They close the sexual act to the gift of life. They do not proceed from a genuine affective and sexual complementarity. Under no circumstances can they be approved.

2358 "The number of men and women who have deep-seated homosexual tendencies is not negligible. This inclination, which is objectively disordered, constitutes for most of them a trial. They must be accepted with respect, compassion, and sesitivity. Every sign of unjust discrimination in their regard should be avoided. These persons are called to fulfill God's will in their lives and, if they are Christians, to unite to the sacrifice of the Lord's Cross te difficulties they may encounter from their condition.

2359 "Homosexual persons are called to chastity. By the virtues of self-mastery that teach them inner freedom, at times by the support of disinterested friendship, by prayer and sacramental grace, they can and should gradually and resolutely approach Christian perfection."

God bless you!

 

[ephraimanesti]

As a sinner who deserves His wrath?

NO--as a wounded child who needs His Love!

ephraim

 

[hlaltimus]

I used to attend a church when I was younger, and I went through a bit of a difficult time, resulting in me not going to church anymore.

Now that I'm older, I would like to maybe explore the faith a little more, and maybe go to church again, to find out what I, myself, believe.

I work for a business ran by a church, which is upstairs from my work, and I'm thinking of going there. A lot of my collegues go there so that's good.

My one major concern is my sexuality. If people find out I'm gay (from one of my collegues or something), then how do I know that people won't judge me? I have no problem with being gay, in my day to day life, but I understand that being gay and religion doesn't always go together like...cheese and bread?

Do you think I should just go anyway? And if and when the time comes that people find out, then what should I do?

Of course you can go to this or almost any other church, but it won't do you any good without God's blessing upon you, and this you will not have if you are guilty of known and willful sin in your life. It doesn't make any difference if you do not recognize something which is traditionally considered as a "sin" or moral flaw, as though "sin" were relative only to your or another's opinion. Well, yes, it is relative...It's relative to God and not to any other inferior, moral and rational agent. If there is a supreme Creator of all known and unknown worlds, then make up your mind here and now whether you believe in this or not as it will mean everything to you eventually. Since you do seek out some sort of Church, this would imply that you do believe in a "Creator" who is to be sought out, studied, and possibly even related to if this is even possible. Well, it is indeed possible, but this puts you boxed into a corner that will defeat your very intention for personal satisfaction with such a mighty Being, if you are beginning at the very onset of your search for Him with something which He is definitely highly offended with. In 3 words: It won't work, and the absence of His blessing upon you is the reason why it won't work. What kind of a gigantic, supernatural and cognizant Being ever could or would compose our universe? Where did He get the atomic matter? A million and a half puzzling mysteries automatically confront you, and every single one of them cries out loudly and demandingly over and over one single word: SUPREMACY. Certainly it wasn't all a ridiculous series of coincidental accidents, and if it were intelligently and designedly framed by some divine Being, then you and I and all other of His creatures had better adapt our views into His, and not expect Him to adapt His views into ours, as the first proposition alone is tenable while the later is utterly preposterous.

If there is a Creator to be sought out, studied and worshipped, (and there is,) then you had better adapt your views into His, as such a profound and limitless Being still holds the very atoms of your present construction in the very palm of His hand, and can just as easily unspeak that constitution as He can preserve it forever in felicity. It is a very wise person who fears this God.

 

[Criada]

You know, sister, God loves you, just as you are.
Don't lose sight of that, k? Many churches will accept you, many won't.
But I would strongly advise you against joining one and pretending to be something that you are not. If you feel that a homosexual life is wrong, then be open about your temptations and struggles. If you believe that it is ok, don't join a church which thinks otherwise... it will only cause heartache and pain.

I hope you can find somewhere where you can be honest and grow in God.

 

[Irrkunst]

You are a whole person who deserves love, acceptance, and respect NOW, as you are. With that in mind, I would highly recommend seeking out an "open and affirming" United Church of Christ (UCC) or Disciples of Christ (DOC) church. Speak to the minster and you will find what you are looking for.

 

[Adoniram]

I used to attend a church when I was younger, and I went through a bit of a difficult time, resulting in me not going to church anymore.

Now that I'm older, I would like to maybe explore the faith a little more, and maybe go to church again, to find out what I, myself, believe.

I work for a business ran by a church, which is upstairs from my work, and I'm thinking of going there. A lot of my collegues go there so that's good.

My one major concern is my sexuality. If people find out I'm gay (from one of my collegues or something), then how do I know that people won't judge me? I have no problem with being gay, in my day to day life, but I understand that being gay and religion doesn't always go together like...cheese and bread?

Do you think I should just go anyway? And if and when the time comes that people find out, then what should I do?

The church that I attend would gladly invite your attendance, but would counsel that finding true peace in Christ would mean turning from the sinful passions of the flesh. An adultress was brought to Jesus and her accusers would have stoned her, but Jesus said "Let him who is without sin cast the first stone." Of course no one could and they left. Jesus, being sinless, rightly could have, but having compassion said "Neither do I accuse you...Go and sin no more." So, following His example, Christians should not condemn, but instead encourage people to turn away from a life of sin. No one has the right to say to anyone "You're going to hell because...whatever," and that's not a very loving way to engage people. All people sin. Even Christians, Paul says "that which I don't want to do, I do; and that which I want to do, I don't." The difference is that Christians, even though they make mistakes from time to time, make honest effort not to live a sinful life rather than just saying something like "this is who I am, so be it." Acquiescing to a life of sin is, in effect, active rebellion against God and His laws, and one cannot have peace with God while living in rebellion. The great thing is that with true repentance and faith in Jesus, He promises to give us strength to overcome our sinful desires, whatever they may be. In my life, I have found release from many sinful passions through reliance on Jesus for strength and encouragement.

By reason of your question, it is certain that God is reaching out to you, trying to draw you to Him. It is He that puts a desire to seek Him in your heart. It is my prayer that you would seek a church fellowship that will encourage and shepherd you along the path of righteousness. You truly can find peace with God.

 

[ToxicBex]

I wouldn't go to the church pretending to be something I'm not. If the conversation came up, for example, "So have you got a boyfriend?"... then I might choose to answer, simply, "No." or if I was amongst someone I could trust, I might tell them. I have no problem with my sexuality, but I want to respect the beliefs of the congregation, therefore, not flaunting it. If it came up in conversation, then I would tell people, and be open about it. I know it is a sin, but I can never swing the other way. I have tried it, and I'm not happy, emotionally or physically, with a man, whereas I am with a woman.

I think I will go to church tomorrow. I'm going to read up on the website what time the service starts... but I'm a bit worried about having stress put on me. Last time I joined a church, I felt very pressurised and things. But I was younger then, and it was a very upbeat church. This church is a little bit more relaxed. I think it's a non denominational church.

Thanks for all of your replies.

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