Struggling in my walk guys. Bigtime. Cant seem to focus on reading Gods word. Feel like a spirit of anger and confusion has come over me. Find myself short tempered, very selfish with my time, lashing out easily at certain ppl in my life, struggles in my relationship with gf, sins that im stuck in, sometimes taking a step back and looking at my fruit and shaking my head in disgust. If i was another person looking at myself in no way whatsoever would i think this person was a christian. I pray pretty much everyday that God would help me. Forgive me. But i cant seem to change my ways. Is it even possible to struggle like this if you are truly saved?? Or is this all signs that in no way im saved? I worry and stress everyday cuz i know we r in last days and many so called watchmen,etc are basically saying get your houses in order right now and repent daily cuz we are in last seconds. Who knows. Im just wondering what someone in my shoes should do? I want to get on the right path,narrow path but sorta feel like im too far gone
My opinion, for what it’s worth
What are you being “saved” from?
Ask yourself this.
You are being “saved” from yourself. Your bad behavior. Your bad desires and bad “fruit”. Your false beliefs.
As long as you continue to bear bad “fruit”, well, you are in need of the Lord’s help.
The Lord says this:
Matthew 7:18. A good tree cannot bring forth evil fruit, neither
can a corrupt tree bring forth good fruit.
See, it’s NOT me speaking to you. Ignore everything I say, but listen to the Lord please.
So, what’s the answer?
Recognize your behavior for what it is. Bad.
Decide that you don’t want to be bad.
Yes, you MUST ask the Lord for help. He is the ONLY one who can help. But you MUST cooperate, you must work with the Lord.
You MUST refrain from bad behavior. Consciously turn away from it.
Now, listen. It’s not going to change instantly. The Lord must work very very slowly to move you from your bad behavior. It may take a long time for you to see results, but DON’T stress over it.
If your heart desires to be a better person, the Lord will work, and you will be successful. I have no doubt you WILL be successful.
Don’t stress over being “saved”. Your desire is to be a “good” tree with good fruit. You WILL be saved from your bad behavior.
When I struggle with certain bad behaviors I often condemned myself when the behavior showed up. The Lord doesn’t want you to condemn yourself. If you are earnestly trying, you are on the right path. You are being “saved” from your bad behavior. You will eventually see noticeable progress.
I said a lot, but I feel for you. I have been in your shoes.
But after some time, I could actually see meaningful progress with my battles against impatience and anger.
Remember, this is all my opinion and understanding.
Your journey is between you and the Lord.