S.a.h.m.

[faithmom]

Hugs to all the moms out on here tonight. We love the kids to pieces, but it sure isn't easy all the time is it.

My 10 year old was cranky as all get out tonight, and tried repeatedly to pick fights with me. I know she hasn't had enough sleep, and neither have I (just came off traveling yesterday)...so I kept trying to keep it in perspective, but the eye rolling and sarcasm really pushed my buttons.

I'm so glad she is in bed now. (I sent her cranky head to bed by 8:30 much to her distress). Tonight I need to love her from a separate room at the moment. LOL!

 

[Pinki]

I spanked my 4yr old today.
he pooped in his pants instead of the toilet.
he's been doing this for quite some time now, and i don't know what to do about it.
i kept him home from preschool, and i sent him to his room.
Later i appologized for spanking him, and he appologized for pooping in his pants.
I am lost on this one.

What do you do instead of spanking?
My son is only 3, but we have our moments. I still give him constant reminders to go to the toilet, and when I know he needs to go, but refuses, I make sure he knows the consequences if he goes in his pants (ie - if he goes in his pants, he has time out). He hates having time out, so most times, he will go to the toilet when the "threat" is made. With a bit of consistency, he makes it most of the time now. Occasionally, when he is REALLY tired, he will quite simply forget to go (and is usually on his way to the toilet when it happens). For "real" accidents, I don't give him consequences, but for "intentional" accidents (when I have reminded him but he has refused to go), he has time out. You might have already been there and done that though!

My current dilemma is whether to continue as a SAHM to 2 boys, or whether to add a 3rd child (ie - a girl) to the mix!

 

[faithmom]

I had two girls, then added a boy to the mix. I call it the variety pack, and life is definitely never ever boring.

 

[faithmom]

I think I posted a while back, that my middle daughter would deliberately go in her pants when she didn't want to stop playing. After a time of trying EVERYTHING (or so I thought I had), my mother suggested if she is really able to control it, have her clean up her own messes. So, everytime she messed after reminders, suggestions, etc. Even refused to go, I made her clean up the pee, I'd dump the poop in the toilet, then she'd have to spot treat and launder the, ahem, skid marks and etc. then put them in the wash. I wouldn't let her leave the bathroom until she had cleaned it up. I also had her do her best to clean herself up. (some additional work on my part was necessary of course), then would have her wash her hands in disinfection soap after. If it doesn't hurt us, it won't hurt them.

Two weeks, and she'd had it doing the work. She kenw I wasn't going to quit and she was potty trained on the times she could control it.

 

[marezee]

What do you do instead of spanking?
My son is only 3, but we have our moments. I still give him constant reminders to go to the toilet, and when I know he needs to go, but refuses, I make sure he knows the consequences if he goes in his pants (ie - if he goes in his pants, he has time out). He hates having time out, so most times, he will go to the toilet when the "threat" is made. With a bit of consistency, he makes it most of the time now. Occasionally, when he is REALLY tired, he will quite simply forget to go (and is usually on his way to the toilet when it happens). For "real" accidents, I don't give him consequences, but for "intentional" accidents (when I have reminded him but he has refused to go), he has time out. You might have already been there and done that though!

My current dilemma is whether to continue as a SAHM to 2 boys, or whether to add a 3rd child (ie - a girl) to the mix!

instead of spanking...well we do time out, take fav toys away, take privileges away, things such as that. I appologized to him because I spanked him in anger. And I shouldn't have done that. I should have cooled off first.
Anyway, Stephen has been "potty trained" for a year. This pooping in his overnite pull-up is a new thing. He holds in his poop during the day. Then while he is sleeping, when he is relaxed, it just comes out. I do not punish him for this.
The thing is, he had a hard BM once, and it hurt. Now he's scared that it will hurt again, so he holds it in. Lately, he has been pushing his fingers up "there" and is getting poop in his pants from that. This is not an "accident."
I am very frustrated with it. it is something i myself cannot control. How do i get him to stop this behavior and go to the toilet? IDK. But I do know that it is definitely not an accident.

As far as staying a SAHM Pinki, you have to do what is in your heart. But don't let anyone fool you....it is a difficult job. And three children is harder than two. Someone said to me b4 i had my third child that it wasn't any different than having two. NOT!!
It is a bit harder, but it was worth it to us!

 

[littlethirsty]

I am a sahm of a two year old little girl. I love being a stay at home mom, and I must admit it is getting more challenging everyday as we hit the twos. I love my daughter to pieces and feel so blessed to get to stay at home with her. I am so thrilled to have found this thread so I can chat with other moms. I had a fantastic job before I had my little one and I do miss it on some days. I was a librarian in a private pre-K to 8th grade school run by Dominican Sisters! It was an awesome place to work, full of the love of the Lord. We moved since then so even if I went back to work it wouldn't be there. I can't imagine going back to work rigth now. It is so nice to meet you all!

 

[marezee]

welcome to our thread littlethirsty!!

I too had a great job b4 children. I was a PT assistant at a Christian-based nursing home. It was very rewarding. i miss it sometimes too! hugs to you and GBU!

 

[faithmom]

More welcomes from me too!

 

[littlethirsty]

Thanks Everybody! Hey Marezee, when I was first out of college I worked as an activity director in a nusring home. Awesome job and like you said very rewarding, hard on some days, but a great job!
I guess it goes to show all great jobs including parenting have tough days

 

[faithmom]

Hey, thirsty, I did that too in Minneapolis for 3 years. Love the job, but the pay wasn't enough to cover rent, car and paying off my student loans. It was sad when I left, so many of the residents had become my friends, and my next two jobs took me out of the area. When I came back to visit, over 3/4 of them had passed away. Very sad.

 

[littlethirsty]

I think that was the gardest part of the job. Unfortunatly I was single and could barely pay rent with what I made, which is ashame because the people in nursing homes desperatly need the interaction that job brings. That is cool that you did that too!

 

[faithmom]

I was single too....and you know, it was the staff that was married who stayed on and continued. I think the job is so rewarding, but unless you have someone to split expenses with, the pay just is not enough to get ahead on. I tried to start a retirement fund for myself that last year, at the end I had 60 dollars, and needed car repairs. I was also teaching for the red cross in the evenings and weekends. I was exhausted. I went on into jobs in sales in safety and pharmaceuticals after that, but they never had that same level of rewarding human interaction.

Sometimes I play with the idea of going back to that now that the kids are in school and hubby is our breadmaker, but the reality is that he and the kids still need so much of me right now. I feel such a strong need to do this motherhood thing the best I can before they grow and are gone.

 

[marezee]

Thanks Everybody! Hey Marezee, when I was first out of college I worked as an activity director in a nusring home. Awesome job and like you said very rewarding, hard on some days, but a great job!
I guess it goes to show all great jobs including parenting have tough days

that is so true!

Hey, thirsty, I did that too in Minneapolis for 3 years. Love the job, but the pay wasn't enough to cover rent, car and paying off my student loans. It was sad when I left, so many of the residents had become my friends, and my next two jobs took me out of the area. When I came back to visit, over 3/4 of them had passed away. Very sad.

yeah...that part of it is sad. But you learn so much from the residents. I worked with both the short-term rehab residents, and the long term residents.
I too miss that "human interaction" at times.

 

[Pinki]

Hey Faithmom... Happy birthday too!!

 

[angelraelz]

hiya

happy birthday faiths mom. I have the right day this time

angel

 

[littlethirsty]

Happy Birthday To You
Happy Birthday To You
Happy Birthday Dear Faithmom
Happy Birthday To You...

in my best singing voice

 

[faithmom]

Awww shucks, y'all...

 

[marezee]

Happy Birthday To You
Happy Birthday To You
Happy Birthday Dear Faithmom
Happy Birthday To You...

in my best singing voice

DITTO!!!!

 

[Moms4Christ]

Happy Birthday!! Faithmom....here's my best rendition in the Spanish version.

Cumpleaños Felíz, Cumpleaños Felíz
Le deseamos a Faithmom
Cumpleaños Felíz
Y muchos mas!

 

[Just4Jesus]

hello mommies