Religion doesn't make sense to me anymore

[EagerBeaverElle]

I am a 22 year old girl, brought up in a christian community and have always followed the 'church rules'. But the more I learn about all the atrocities that have been commited by 'men of God' throughout history the more I am beginning to question everything christianity stands for.

I still believe in God and our saviour Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit, but i cannot reconcile the Holy trinity with religion. Religion is not holy it is man made! The bible frustrates me! Its full of contradictions and so sexist! And most christians I know are judgemental and arrogant and do not have the slightest bit of compassion or tollerance.

And it is simply impossible to be happy if i am constantly feeling anguish and guilt for every sin i commit. I am pro-choice. I don't believe in marriage. I dont believe being gay is wrong. I DONT believe in women being submissive to men. And i will NOT repent for these beliefs! Does that make me a sinner condemned to hell for all eternity??? Please help me find answers.

 

[Eudaimonist]

And i will NOT repent for these beliefs! Does that make me a sinner condemned to hell for all eternity???

Honestly, if you can write that post, that tells me that you haven't sold your soul. You have retained your judgment and your integrity. You are whole. This is what you should be worried about losing.


eudaimonia,

Mark

 

[EagerBeaverElle]

Thank you for your response Mark. I am just so confused. Is it wrong to question the Bible? Our church teaches that we should believe like children and not question the word of God. But I honestly can't do that. I can't force myself to think like a child. And our pastors at church are experts at avoiding hard questions-its impossible to get a definitive answer out of them! I just cant be another mindless christian zombie!

 

[Tinker Grey]

Your OP is consonant with many liberal Christians. I'd recommend getting some support in the sub-forum "Whosoever will may come" (WWMC) up the in the denominational section of the Christians Only section.

 

[motherprayer]

Have you tried seeking out a new church? Just to visit maybe?
When we grow as Christians it is possible to outgrow our church home, and its always hard when that happens.
I promise you, the Bible is NOT sexist, it is full of accounts of how high a woman's status is in God's eye.
I also promise, the Bible is no less powerful because of the atrocities committed that were "sanctioned" by Biblical principles. It was humans using it wrong.
The Bible is such a beautiful, misunderstood Book, but it is no less right because people don't read it fully.
Also, the only "man" the Bible says a woman should submit to is her husband, but he is also called to treat her with respect, and in 1 Peter it talks about how important it is that a man do just that.
I'm praying for you! Don't lose faith because of bad people, our God is so much better than any sinful person!

 

[EagerBeaverElle]

Thanks for all the advice and support! I live in a very small town so church choices are limited. (and upon reaching 18 our church kind of makes us promise to not join another church so thats been holding me back a bit) but I'm at varsity in the city so i'll check out some places there.

 

[Jade Margery]

You will get a lot of people who try to convince you that what's written in the Bible isn't what it -really- means. It's not -really- sexist! It's not -really- violent! All those people through all the centuries that killed or tortured each other over that book were just mistaken, that's all! We know what it really means now.

To heck with that. Continue to think for yourself and form your own opinions. Don't blindly follow the words of others. Question and explore. Keep looking. Eventually, you'll find what really makes sense.

 

[EagerBeaverElle]

Thank you jade. This gives me hpoe

 

[yasic]

If when you die you stand before God and say "I spent my life trying to live the best way I can live, I have done what I can to support myself, my friends, my family, and my community, I have made mistakes but I tried to take actions to make up for them, I have sought the truth even if it was unpleasant, I did not blindly follow anyone but instead tried to use the mind that you created for me to the best capacity I could" and God does not accept you... would you really want to spend eternity with such a god?

Keep seeking, critically look at everything, and most importantly enjoy life. You have your whole life ahead of you and you clearly do want to do what is best, that alone should be enough.

 

[Gadarene]

Thank you for your response Mark. I am just so confused. Is it wrong to question the Bible? Our church teaches that we should believe like children and not question the word of God. But I honestly can't do that. I can't force myself to think like a child. And our pastors at church are experts at avoiding hard questions-its impossible to get a definitive answer out of them! I just cant be another mindless christian zombie!

Then don't be.

If it is the truth, then it will surely survive whatever questions you will throw at it.

Although in the interests of full disclosure, that's the attitude I held, and I'm now an atheist. If you're more concerned with truth over belief/piety though, which you seem to be, that prospect won't be too much of an obstacle, I suspect.

 

[Gadarene]

nm

 

[Amber Bird]

I am a 22 year old girl, brought up in a christian community and have always followed the 'church rules'. But the more I learn about all the atrocities that have been commited by 'men of God' throughout history the more I am beginning to question everything christianity stands for.

I still believe in God and our saviour Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit, but i cannot reconcile the Holy trinity with religion. Religion is not holy it is man made! The bible frustrates me! Its full of contradictions and so sexist! And most christians I know are judgemental and arrogant and do not have the slightest bit of compassion or tollerance.

And it is simply impossible to be happy if i am constantly feeling anguish and guilt for every sin i commit. I am pro-choice. I don't believe in marriage. I dont believe being gay is wrong. I DONT believe in women being submissive to men. And i will NOT repent for these beliefs! Does that make me a sinner condemned to hell for all eternity??? Please help me find answers.

It's a beautiful thing that you're willing to be so honest about your own emotions in this regard when you're still so young to appreciate where your inner spirit is leading you next.



Religion isn't mandatory to know God. If you have questions maybe that's God speaking to you in his own way of saying;follow me.
Personal integrity is paramount to finding a good life for yourself.
Many blessings surround you as you continue your journey.

 

[EagerBeaverElle]

Thank you all for the support and comfort! And thanks Gadarene for the spelling correction (english is only my 2nd language so bear with me) im so glad i found this forum!

 

[Gadarene]

Thank you all for the support and comfort! And thanks Gadarene for the spelling correction (english is only my 2nd language so bear with me) im so glad i found this forum!

Spelling correction?

 

[EagerBeaverElle]

U said nm...i assumed that i spelt condemn wrong and u were correcting.

 

[Gadarene]

U said nm...i assumed that i spelt condemn wrong and u were correcting.

Oh, that.

Nah, double post, so just shoved in nm (nevermind)

 

[EagerBeaverElle]

Oops sorry...u said 'nm' earlier. I assumed u were correcting my spelling of condemned. Spelling is not my strong suit

 

[EagerBeaverElle]

Sorry now i double posted...

 

[Ukrainia]

I’m glad you’ve thought about this. Whatever one’s view is on Christianity, it would be unfortunate if it were not a well thought out one, complete with a lot of questioning and searching for answers. I’ll do my best to provide what I hope comes across as reasonable input.

First, you’re right about the history of Christianity. It’s disconcerting, for sure. Under the flag of Christianity, many have committed horrible actions, whether that’s the treatment of the Jews throughout the middle ages, varying Christian sects declaring war on other Christians for what might be considered today minor theological differences, and for present day examples abuses of religious power whether sex scandals or financial fraud are all too common.

It’s not Christian action that’s the basis for the power of Christianity, but Christ’s response to such actions. He talked with adulterers, comforted tax collectors and even the criminal on the cross, all too deserving of his own punishment, was shown grace and love by Jesus - in a moment when he was in immense pain himself he was thinking of others. In fact, Jesus was on the cross as an act of love for the world.

What does this mean, in terms of what we should feel when we sin? I think a bit of humility regarding our own capabilities is in good, and there are times when we should show remorse over our sinfulness. But constant anguish and guilt is neither good nor necessary. The apostle Paul was a former Pharisee who persecuted Christians and looked on with support during their executions. He writes about sin and it’s consequences. But what shines through mostly is his love for Jesus and Jesus’ love for him. And in that, regardless of the persecution he faces or his time spent in prison - whatever happens, he has found contentment.

Many of the issues you feel most strongly about have to do with social issues – homosexuality and abortion and the submissiveness of women. For some of these issues it would be interesting as to why you feel the Biblical view is wrong. I heard the Chesterton quote recently, that “Christianity has not been found tried and wanting. It’s been found difficult and not tried.” I think, especially in today’s age, that’s true. Oftentimes what’s fun and easy, doesn’t correspond to what’s difficult and ethical. I also think that due to the cultural popularity of certain ideas, arguments for Christian ethical ideas are presumed to be old fashioned and and utterly irrational while not given a fair hearing.

I hope you keep on questioning and searching. I’d add that just because you might reject the arguments for Christianity that you’ve been brought up with, doesn’t mean that there aren’t more persuasive reasons for Christianity from other Christian thinkers. There are a diverse range of Christians with different views, and rejecting some ideas by some Christians in no way means that all of Christianity should be dispatched with.

 

[EagerBeaverElle]

Thanks for the very thorough reply ukrania. I would like explain my reasoning for rejecting the biblical viewpoints on the various social issues, but it would take all night.

If so many different christians believe so many different things, then some of us must have it wrong? Will we be punished for it?