Rating system - really?

[GuacaMolly]

Some men would follow that logic but they are fools and they will reap what they sow if they choose to place so much emphasis on physical appearance and ignore more important things. I don't think anybody on here would be interested in someone like that and I would argue that the majority of mature Christian men wouldn't shoot for looks alone since most of us are more interested in marriage and the long term compatibility that it requires.

I completely agree with you there--- I guess my point is, rating women on their attractiveness makes it seem as though the person doing the rating puts a lot of importance on looks, and if that's not what you (you used generally) want to convey then maybe it's something to think about? That's all.

 

[deliciousBass]

I completely agree with you there--- I guess my point is, rating women on their attractiveness makes it seem as though the person doing the rating puts a lot of importance on looks, and if that's not what you (you used generally) want to convey then maybe it's something to think about? That's all.

I think you bring up a very valid point.

 

[ido]

Some men would follow that logic but they are fools and they will reap what they sow if they choose to place so much emphasis on physical appearance and ignore more important things. I don't think anybody on here would be interested in someone like that and I would argue that the majority of mature Christian men wouldn't shoot for looks alone since most of us are more interested in marriage and the long term compatibility that it requires.

I was married to a man like that. It was subtle at first and I blew off his obsession with getting me into the gym as being due to the fact that he is a personal trainer. It wasn't until he started working at a new gym where the women all were plastic surgery junkies that I realized just how important physical appearance is to him. When he came home one day, he handed me a list of about 10 surgical procedures and proceeded to offer to go $15K in debt to have my fly down to Costa Rica and have them all done. I don't think I've ever felt as "un-beautiful" as I did that day. So, yeah - when I say I care more about what a man thinks of me as a person than my appearance...I mean it.

So no one goes feeling all sorry for me, I'm actually pretty secure about myself these days...I've done a lot of healing.

 

[Beauty4Ashes]

I was married to a man like that. It was subtle at first and I blew off his obsession with getting me into the gym as being due to the fact that he is a personal trainer. It wasn't until he started working at a new gym where the women all were plastic surgery junkies that I realized just how important physical appearance is to him. When he came home one day, he handed me a list of about 10 surgical procedures and proceeded to offer to go $15K in debt to have my fly down to Costa Rica and have them all done. I don't think I've ever felt as "un-beautiful" as I did that day. So, yeah - when I say I care more about what a man thinks of me as a person than my appearance...I mean it.

So no one goes feeling all sorry for me, I'm actually pretty secure about myself these days...I've done a lot of healing.

You are beautiful you don't need no stinkin procedures. I know you already know this. I just wanted to reiterate it anyway.

That guy was a douche.

 

[Thomas1984]

I was married to a man like that. It was subtle at first and I blew off his obsession with getting me into the gym as being due to the fact that he is a personal trainer. It wasn't until he started working at a new gym where the women all were plastic surgery junkies that I realized just how important physical appearance is to him. When he came home one day, he handed me a list of about 10 surgical procedures and proceeded to offer to go $15K in debt to have my fly down to Costa Rica and have them all done. I don't think I've ever felt as "un-beautiful" as I did that day. So, yeah - when I say I care more about what a man thinks of me as a person than my appearance...I mean it.

So no one goes feeling all sorry for me, I'm actually pretty secure about myself these days...I've done a lot of healing.

You are beautiful you don't need no stinkin procedures. I know you already know this. I just wanted to reiterate it anyway.

That guy was a douche.

Quoted for absolute Truth, with a capital T!

 

[ido]

You are beautiful you don't need no stinkin procedures. I know you already know this. I just wanted to reiterate it anyway.

That guy was a douche.

Quoted for absolute Truth, with a capital T!

Thanks you two.

 

[Spicy McHaggis]

I've noticed a few of the guys (you know who you are ) use a 1-10 rating system when talking about girls. I haven't noticed girls doing this though.

Is it a guy thing? Do you automatically/subconsciouslly rate every girl? If you rate people, do you rate the same sex, too - or just the opposite sex?

I don't think I've ever thought in terms of a rating system...and I don't think I would want to know where I fall on the scale.

Years ago me and a friend had an excel spreadheet for our rating system. Girls could get partial points and bonus points then we graphed it out and determined benchmark and her name was Diana.

EDIT: The rating system wasn't just looks either.

 

[*StarGirl*]

I think it seems kind of hurtful to rate a girl only by her looks. I mean, even you start to like her it's still qualified by her atractiveness rating. "She's a four but she's really funny" It's like throwing a dog a bone. It sort of makes girls a commodity if you think about. It lessens them as people a little.

 

[Spicy McHaggis]

I think it seems kind of hurtful to rate a girl only by her looks. I mean, even you start to like her it's still qualified by her atractiveness rating. "She's a four but she's really funny" It's like throwing a dog a bone. It sort of makes girls a commodity if you think about. It lessens them as people a little.

I think the funny thing about that is girls will do the same thing "Well he's not as cute as so and so but he's really funny..." but they only admit it to their friends and don't assign numbers, so they can maintain the illusion that they're not just as bad as men when it comes to this stuff.

Cause really, if a girl ever sat down with a friend and discussed or compared one or more guys she might be interested in she's doing the same thing, just, without the numbers.

Or in my case without the charts and graphs either.


or the March Madness style brackets.


or the steel cage death match.


but you get what I'm saying, it's hard to decide which girl you like.

 

[*StarGirl*]

So you use numbers to figure it out? You can't just follow your heart? Having to weigh out stats about someone is how you choose who you like? What if there was a girl who averaged out really low do to her looks but was everything you ever wanted based on her personality. Would you let her go because she didn't rank? Or would you not even consider it?

 

[Spicy McHaggis]

So you use numbers to figure it out? You can't just follow your heart? Having to weigh out stats about someone is how you choose who you like? What if there was a girl who averaged out really low do to her looks but was everything you ever wanted based on her personality. Would you let her go because she didn't rank? Or would you not even consider it?

I think you might be assuming my rating scale is too heavily weighted on looks.

Religion, personality, intelligence, charisma, etc. are all considerations, I just have no problem admitting to it.

If she didn't have what I was looking for in those areas, good looks aren't enough to bring her up the scale.

Just like guys get lower ratings, even if there aren't numbers assigned, for "not being able to provide for a family".

Which is just a nice (well not to the other person) way of saying "doesn't make enough money" in the same way a guy will say "takes care of herself" so he doesn't have to say "not fat".

It's all the same, everyone does it.

 

[Spicy McHaggis]

So you use numbers to figure it out?

Oh, and no.

It doesn't neccessarily dictate actions, it just, exists.

And it depends on how involved you want to dig into the systems. I mean, say you raank and actually prefer a 7 to an 8. That means you either need to re-work the rating system or look at yourself and realize what characteristics you really care about.

Like, if the 8 is non-Christian but good looking and you go with the 6, then you know her faith is more important than the way she looks, you learn that about yourself and adjust the ratings to give more weight to religious prefernece.

In that instance, wether the system exists or not, the person you end up with with most likely fall very high on your personal scale.

 

[ido]

The spreadsheet sounds slightly more normal than the guy in HS that asked my sister for some hair from her hairbrush so he could put a spell on his neighborhood - any girl that walked past his house would fall in love with him.

 

[*StarGirl*]

I must be assuming on the looks thing, because the thread is about rating based on looks. My bad.


I guess I'm not getting into the cool kids club now.

 

[*StarGirl*]

Oh, and no.

It doesn't neccessarily dictate actions, it just, exists.

Nothing just exists, everything influences everything

 

[ido]

I think you might be assuming my rating scale is too heavily weighted on looks.

Religion, personality, intelligence, charisma, etc. are all considerations, I just have no problem admitting to it.

If she didn't have what I was looking for in those areas, good looks aren't enough to bring her up the scale.

Just like guys get lower ratings, even if there aren't numbers assigned, for "not being able to provide for a family".

Which is just a nice (well not to the other person) way of saying "doesn't make enough money" in the same way a guy will say "takes care of herself" so he doesn't have to say "not fat".

It's all the same, everyone does it.

I'm a 10, right? RIGHT? I thought so.

 

[Spicy McHaggis]

Nothing just exists, everything influences everything

unless you flip the cause and effect around.

I like pizza more than I like pumpkins.

Not because pizza is a ten and pumpkins are a 1, but because I prefer one, I assign it a higher ranking as a way to explain to other people just how much I like pizza and how much I hate pumpkins.

 

[Spicy McHaggis]

I'm a 10, right? RIGHT? I thought so.

well duh.
















































(my scale goes to 100)


zzzZZZING!!!1

just kidding I heart you.

 

[*StarGirl*]

You hate pumpkins? Maybe I don't want in your club

 

[Spicy McHaggis]

You hate pumpkins? Maybe I don't want in your club

Just the taste. and that goes for all gourds(sp?) actually.

carving pumpins into jack-o-lanterns is a hoot though.

And I enjoy the music of Smashing Pumpkins.