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Rarely Depressed

Niffer

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I really am not a depressed person.
I never have been - I'm more like an emotional firecracker. I just kinda explode, it doesn't last long, but its INTENSE, then I settle back down and feel better.

But lately, I cannot shake this icky, like someone is squeezing my heart and stomach, life seems monotonous and sad.
Logically, I know I am SO blessed.

But maybe its this long, freezing, dreary winter that is STILL showing no signs of letting up, or marriage stresses or even just toddler-weariness.

But I kinda just want to curl into a ball and hide under my covers and have a pity party.

I hate this feeling, and I don't really know how to cope.
It's definitely creating more tension in my marriage, and since Remi does have depression, and is the more quiet introvert, he's pretty awful at bolstering my spirits. (Though, bless him, he does try..)

So just some prayers or advice would be great...

Thanks,
~ Niff
 

LoveConquers

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Praying for you...

Have you thought about speaking with a counselor/therapist?

And yes, from my experience the weather can have an affect on your mood...try to let as much sunlight as possible into your home whenever the sun is out. And if the weather is bearable, going outside can help as well.
 
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hijklmnop

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I'm sorry Niffer. The winters really used to get to me too come this time of year (fellow Canadian here), until I started supplementing with vitamin D. Have you tried that? Also, you could try a SAD light...I got one for a client for 70 bucks and his mood has been muh better since. It mimics natural sunlight and you just sit in front of it for 15 mins a day or so. Supposedly can help a lot with seasonal affective disorder. And of course, see a doctor/therapist if it isn't letting up. I also know how difficult it can be living with a spouse who is depressed. Sometimes I swear it's contagious!! (Hug)
 
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ValleyGal

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On one hand, I want to say go and "curl into a ball and hide under my covers and have a pity party." But only do that if you put a time limit on it, like a day. On the other hand, I'm not sure how helpful that would be. I suppose it couldn't hurt if you plan ahead to do some things to lift your spirits after your pity party, like go out for a fun evening with your girlfriends, or have a comedy night with Remi or whatever other fun thing you can think of that is adult (I don't mean xxx, but rather not child-oriented) in nature. What kinds of things do you smile or laugh about? Oh...exercising is good for it - helps release endorphins, makes you feel better.

It really has been a long winter for most of the country. I've had a beautiful winter, but for the last couple of weeks we've been having snow storms. lol. We are having one right now, and it looks so pretty but makes me think today should be a pajama day.^_^
 
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mkgal1

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Prayers for you, Niffer. I think that HIJKLMNOP has some great suggestions. You had mentioned a while back about Remi supplementing with maca.....that may be another thing to try. You've been "the strong and 'happy' one" for so long now........it's bound to drain something out of you (physically even).
 
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ProudMomxmany

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Niffer...my sister...there are times when we, as women, give and give and give and eventually we run out of give. Sort of like a gas tank...you can only go so far before you have to go fill up again. Now, who's filling YOUR gas tank up?

Is there any way you could maybe explain to Remi that you NEED him to "fill your tank" and how to do it? Seeing a counselor definitely wouldn't hurt. Being depressed is not a sign of weakness...it's a sign you've been the strong one for just too long. Find ways to get your tank filled.

((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))), love and prayers from here! PM me if you'd like to talk. I'm a charter member of the "been there, done that" club!
 
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iLove

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I really am not a depressed person.
I never have been - I'm more like an emotional firecracker. I just kinda explode, it doesn't last long, but its INTENSE, then I settle back down and feel better.

But lately, I cannot shake this icky, like someone is squeezing my heart and stomach, life seems monotonous and sad.
Logically, I know I am SO blessed.

But maybe its this long, freezing, dreary winter that is STILL showing no signs of letting up, or marriage stresses or even just toddler-weariness.

But I kinda just want to curl into a ball and hide under my covers and have a pity party.

I hate this feeling, and I don't really know how to cope.
It's definitely creating more tension in my marriage, and since Remi does have depression, and is the more quiet introvert, he's pretty awful at bolstering my spirits. (Though, bless him, he does try..)

So just some prayers or advice would be great...

Thanks,
~ Niff
Pray the Lords prayer daily! When you say, " gives us this day our daily bread", it means God shall supply all your needs according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus. God will do this in the natural and spiritual. In the natural this includes your peace, grace (unmerited favor of God), healing, love, marriage restoration, hedge of protection, no weapons formed against you will prosper, strength where you have been weaken, deliverance, sweet sleep, food, and all your needs according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus. In the spiritual He will give you a word for transformation which is the ongoing sanctification process...my sheep know my voice. For the word of God is living and active and sharper than any two-edged sword, and piercing as far as the division of soul and spirit, of both joints and marrow, and able to judge the thoughts and intentions of the heart. Hebrews 4:12 NASB
 
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Niffer

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I'm sorry Niffer. The winters really used to get to me too come this time of year (fellow Canadian here), until I started supplementing with vitamin D. Have you tried that? Also, you could try a SAD light...I got one for a client for 70 bucks and his mood has been muh better since. It mimics natural sunlight and you just sit in front of it for 15 mins a day or so. Supposedly can help a lot with seasonal affective disorder. And of course, see a doctor/therapist if it isn't letting up. I also know how difficult it can be living with a spouse who is depressed. Sometimes I swear it's contagious!! (Hug)

I think I really should start supplementing with vitamin D, you're right.
And as for the contagious thing...yep, sometimes I feel like: "I was happy 'till you showed up and bummed me out." ..and then of course, I feel guilty about feeling that way.... :(

On one hand, I want to say go and "curl into a ball and hide under my covers and have a pity party." But only do that if you put a time limit on it, like a day. On the other hand, I'm not sure how helpful that would be. I suppose it couldn't hurt if you plan ahead to do some things to lift your spirits after your pity party, like go out for a fun evening with your girlfriends, or have a comedy night with Remi or whatever other fun thing you can think of that is adult (I don't mean xxx, but rather not child-oriented) in nature. What kinds of things do you smile or laugh about? Oh...exercising is good for it - helps release endorphins, makes you feel better.

It really has been a long winter for most of the country. I've had a beautiful winter, but for the last couple of weeks we've been having snow storms. lol. We are having one right now, and it looks so pretty but makes me think today should be a pajama day.^_^

I am one of those people who can't pity party for a day, I'm sorta an all-or-nothing kinda gal. If I let myself do that, I know it'd just make it harder for me to stop. Bizarrely that's why I don't take baths (unless I'm sick and have the chills) Baths make me feel melancholy. So I avoid those too. (lol!)
This winter HAS been beautiful, but frigid. I want to go out and run around so badly, that I've even thought of buying a gym membership so I can go and just move my body for an hour!
I've tried to take walks and such, but with a 2 year old, in -30 degree weather with 3 feet of snow, who refuses to use a stroller because she wants to walk, makes it pretty difficult.
So I feel like I've spent all winter indoors.

I think the body snatchers came and replaced NIffer. WHo is this?!? lol. Seriously though will be praying for you. I'm sure you will feel better in no time! :)

LOL! Thanks, I really appreciate it. Once spring hits, I'm really hoping that will help!

Prayers for you, Niffer. I think that HIJKLMNOP has some great suggestions. You had mentioned a while back about Remi supplementing with maca.....that may be another thing to try. You've been "the strong and 'happy' one" for so long now........it's bound to drain something out of you (physically even).

That's a really good idea too!
I should have been more prepared..Remi is in his own 'downswing' in his moods, and its made life...difficult, of late.
Like you said, I really try to be the "happy one" especially during these times, because I know that's what he needs.
That being said, I spent most of this past weekend crying.
Not because of any real tragedy, but when I feel THIS sad, I just let myself cry, knowing I'll feel better after.
Unfortunately that's not happening this time. I cry and I feel the same, which is why I'm worried. Crying almost always helps, at least for me.

Niffer...my sister...there are times when we, as women, give and give and give and eventually we run out of give. Sort of like a gas tank...you can only go so far before you have to go fill up again. Now, who's filling YOUR gas tank up?

Is there any way you could maybe explain to Remi that you NEED him to "fill your tank" and how to do it? Seeing a counselor definitely wouldn't hurt. Being depressed is not a sign of weakness...it's a sign you've been the strong one for just too long. Find ways to get your tank filled.

((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))), love and prayers from here! PM me if you'd like to talk. I'm a charter member of the "been there, done that" club!

Thanks ProudMomxmany. ((HUGS)) I can't rely on Remi to 'fill my tank' right now - he's having a hard time as it is.
Though he really IS trying, making sure we have time together and talking/cuddling, things to help me feel more 'connected'.

I feel a bit better today, but still kinda cruddy. I just need to get motivated again and rally.

~ Niffer
 
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hijklmnop

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The gym membership is a great idea if you know that getting out and active helps. Or you could just pay the few bucks each time you go if you don't want to commit to a full membership since spring is Getting close. (It is, I swear!!!) daylight savings time is just around the corner too...more daylight is definitely a helpful thing.
FYI I start taking 1000 U of vit D daily as soon as winter arrives and don't stop till spring is in full bloom. It has really done wonders in preventing my usual late winter slump.
And try not to feel guilty about how you feel about Remi. It's only natural. Sometimes I'll have a fabulous day at work, come home to my hubby when he's in a "down" and notice that within a couple hours, my mood has changed. I then struggle with resentment at times. It's hard to stay positive when your life partner isn't there with ya. I recommend chatting with friends, getting out for any reason, watching comedies, whatever helps. I literally keep a list of Happy Things on my phone...ideas of stuff I can do to make myself feel better when I'm struggling.
Hope you start feeling better soon!
 
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Inkachu

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Oh darlin', you're talking to the queen of S.A.D. here, so I know what you're dealing with! It's completely possible that you're feeling some end-of-winter blues, even if you aren't generally prone to S.A.D. like I am. When winter hangs on for an especially long time, it's even worse. Being indoors, the lack of fresh air, sunlight, and exercise, it WILL take a toll on your mental state eventually. Having a hubby prone to depression and a needy toddler are totally legit reasons that could be adding to it.

Advice? Eat healthy, exercise daily (even if it's just walking in place for 30 minutes), sleep enough (but don't oversleep, it screws up your circadian rhythms even worse), keep your house well-lit, engage your brain with happy things (upbeat movies, upbeat music, play family games together). I'm about to replace my PC desktop background with something spring-ish, just to remind myself that spring IS COMING. My ticker says so!
 
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Niffer

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Thanks Ink! I have been trying to 'get out' more and do more walks and such.
What I have found has been really helping me is scrapbooking, I have no idea why, but I do 1-2 pages almost a day, and that creative outlet has been really making me feel so much better.

Plus I'm getting a nice scrapbook out of it too! ;)

~ Niff
 
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ParentofChildren

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Add the vitamin D, are you sleeping enough? How is your diet? Are you skimping on carbs? Are you keeping up with Yoga? Are you exercising. How is your health otherwise?

Are there aspects in your life; finances, home, children, spouse that you may be over thinking. Imagine a glass half full in your hand being held over a table. If you hold for 15seconds, how do you feel? How about 15 minutes? Are you dwelling on something?
 
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mkgal1

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Besides Vit D.....another thing you may want to look into is whether or not your iodine deficient. Most people are in the U.S. and Canada....and a deficiency contributes to depression and low energy.

Summary
Iodine is critical to healthy thyroid function. Its deficiency can cause weight gain, low energy, depression, cardiovascular disease, cognitive decline, and a variety of cancers.

Yet rates of iodine deficiency have reached epidemic levels, increasing fourfold over the past 40 years. A startling 74% of normal, “healthy” adults may no longer be consuming sufficient quantities.~https://www.lef.org/magazine/mag2011/oct2011_The-Silent-Epidemic-of-Iodine-Deficiency_01.htm

It's easy for you to even test yourself (to get a ballpark idea):

If you suspect you might be deficient in this necessary trace mineral you can perform a simple self test, although it may not be completely accurate. Paint a two inch spot on a soft skin tissue area such as your inner upper arm, or upper thigh, with tincture of iodine. If it takes longer than 18 hours for the stain to disappear, it is a good indicator you are iodine sufficient. If it absorbs more quickly, say 2 to 3 hours, you may possibly need to supplement. You may, then, want to have a more accurate, in depth, simple saliva or urine test performed.~Iodine Deficient? A Simple Self-Test Can Show You Now
 
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