• Welcome to Christian Forums
  1. Welcome to Christian Forums, a forum to discuss Christianity in a friendly surrounding.

    Your voice is missing! You will need to register to be able to join in fellowship with Christians all over the world.

    We hope to see you as a part of our community soon and God Bless!

  2. The forums in the Christian Congregations category are now open only to Christian members. Please review our current Faith Groups list for information on which faith groups are considered to be Christian faiths. Christian members please remember to read the Statement of Purpose threads for each forum within Christian Congregations before posting in the forum.
  3. Please note there is a new rule regarding the posting of videos. It reads, "Post a summary of the videos you post . An exception can be made for music videos.". Unless you are simply sharing music, please post a summary, or the gist, of the video you wish to share.
  4. There have been some changes in the Life Stages section involving the following forums: Roaring 20s, Terrific Thirties, Fabulous Forties, and Golden Eagles. They are changed to Gen Z, Millennials, Gen X, and Golden Eagles will have a slight change.
  5. CF Staff, Angels and Ambassadors; ask that you join us in praying for the world in this difficult time, asking our Holy Father to stop the spread of the virus, and for healing of all affected.

Featured Questioning if I'm really saved/born again

Discussion in 'For New Christians' started by Sunflower Garden, Mar 10, 2020.

  1. Sunflower Garden

    Sunflower Garden New Member

    34
    +18
    United States
    Lutheran
    Private
    I’ve been questioning if I have been really born again at all lately. When I converted my freshman year and had genuine positive change / fruit / felt connected to God in my life, I still justified and defended homosexuality (saying it wasn’t a sin, but there was mistranslation issues) without any conviction. I did the same with watching horror movies, reading creepy stories, listening to some bad music, reading Harry Potter...well, there was some, but I denied and ignored it. I continued on like this for two years until now…would a true believer really do that?

    What if I was saved for a really short time but then my name was quickly blotted out of the book of life? When I first stumbled upon the Romans verses that condemn homosexuality, I was shook because I didn’t know they were in there, and I was flat out angry at God. I felt like I felt hatred towards Him.

    I backslid so bad my sophomore year, too. Not just sexual sin, but idolatry too. (Will elaborate more if needed). I repented of this backsliding but I keep questioning if it was truly sincere because I’m struggling to feel bad or convicted about anything I do. I think I have mental assent…I feel like my faith is merely a mind thing and no longer a heart thing anymore. I think I lost my faith/salvation because of the blatant sin I was living in for a while without true repentance until (I hope) recently.

    I also feel like I’ve been becoming too spiritually apathetic/neutral and hard-hearted lately.
    I feel hopeless. “It’s so unlikely you’ll end up saved anyway, so why even try?” I already feel like it’s too late for me, that faith has left my heart, that I’ve lost my relationship with God. And I feel like I don’t care enough about it. I keep seeing 6 appear three times in a row and I’m scared it means there are demonic omens following me.

    What if I’m not elect, not one of God’s chosen people? What if that’s why I’m getting no results from all this striving?
    I also fear I may have blasphemed the holy spirit (unpardonable sin) when I was younger, I was very angry at God, full of hate, and I think at one point I told Him I wanted nothing to do with Him or at least thought it in my heart.

    I know fear and doubt are sins…I don’t know how to get out of this. I feel like I’ve lost all my faith, all my trust, all my belief that He loves me…and that I can’t ever restore that now. I'm still trying to seek God daily but it feels so dry now, and that discourages me from trying to seek real spiritual change because I feel like nothing WILL change. I feel like I’m going to die forever and there’s nothing I can do. I can’t feel better no matter what.
     
    We teamed up with Faith Counseling. Can they help you today?
  2. yeshuaslavejeff

    yeshuaslavejeff simple truth, martyr, disciple of Yahshua

    +10,865
    Anabaptist
    perhaps key.

    Whatever someone follows, that is their god.

    i.e. they are a true believer in something, even though for most they never find the truth - they believe in all the lies.
     
  3. miamited

    miamited Ted Supporter

    +4,145
    United States
    Christian
    Married
    Hi SG,

    I believe that one should follow all the counsel of God's word. His counsel is that we should constantly renew our minds with the washing of His word. How are you doing on that?

    God bless,
    In Christ, ted
     
  4. Maria Billingsley

    Maria Billingsley Well-Known Member Supporter

    +1,909
    United States
    Christian
    In Relationship
    This type of thinking is the work of the deceiver. The elect are those who stay the course. Sanctification is a process. God knows your heart however ignorance to "His will" leads to the quenching of His Holy Spirit working in your life. We all have seasons of quenching the Holy Spirit but He never leaves us. If you genuinely seek Him, He will not forsake you.
    Blessings.
     
  5. yeshuaslavejeff

    yeshuaslavejeff simple truth, martyr, disciple of Yahshua

    +10,865
    Anabaptist
    Jesus told His Own disciples/ the apostles too/ to use everything within themselves, every nerve, every part of their mind, every hope, every thought, every action ? //
    to continue seeking to enter God's Kingdom - He said because many are trying to enter His Kingdom and are not able to.
     
  6. Sunflower Garden

    Sunflower Garden New Member

    34
    +18
    United States
    Lutheran
    Private
    I don't know. I'm trying my best to read 3 chapters of my bible daily and turn away from my sin. I go to Church / fellowship as often as possible. I pray but it feels like I'm just talking to myself. It all feels like nothing. It didn't use to be, though. I used to feel genuine closeness to and growth in God but now I doubt if that was ever real. Or if it was real, then I've lost it, and can't get it back. My heart is a heavy, unfeeling rock.
     
  7. Sunflower Garden

    Sunflower Garden New Member

    34
    +18
    United States
    Lutheran
    Private
    That's what worries me...I'm scared I'm not really living all out for God...I'm going to to an expensive art school right now and ever believer around me tells me this is God's plan for me, but I can't stop thinking that if I don't make religious art, then I'm just following selfish ambition. I just feel like no matter what I do I will never be able to please God because I'm so focused on myself. I feel like I'm not truly a slave to God like I should. Please pray for me.
     
  8. yeshuaslavejeff

    yeshuaslavejeff simple truth, martyr, disciple of Yahshua

    +10,865
    Anabaptist
    Jesus never said to follow, trust, or be led by feelings. They are very misleading daily.
     
  9. yeshuaslavejeff

    yeshuaslavejeff simple truth, martyr, disciple of Yahshua

    +10,865
    Anabaptist
    Who told anyone, ever, that any art was okay with the Creator at all ? See? Get to the root, and not looking at the 'leaves' (outwardly) ...
     
  10. Sunflower Garden

    Sunflower Garden New Member

    34
    +18
    United States
    Lutheran
    Private
    Everyone tells me that but I feel like there's some truth in feeling. Ever since I backslid last year, everything spiritual wise is going downhill for me and I can't help feeling like I'm going to be on the wrong side of God that day...
     
  11. Sunflower Garden

    Sunflower Garden New Member

    34
    +18
    United States
    Lutheran
    Private
    Wait, do you think art is bad? I don't understand.
     
  12. Tolworth John

    Tolworth John Well-Known Member

    +2,540
    United Kingdom
    Non-Denom
    Married
    Someone who is not a Christian would not be seeking God, or angry at discovering the Bible says.
    Please reexamine what caused you to be a Christian.
    It may have been an emotional moment but what Facts cause you to say that you accepted Jesus as Your Lord and Saviour.
    Christianity is not a feel good experience. As you have found out it challenges many of our ideas, it imposes God's morality on to us and it is based on historical facts.
    Jesus really did live, die a horrible death and was raised to life.

    Part of being a Christian involves meeting up with other Christian regularly either at church or in some other Christian student group.
     
  13. Goodhuman

    Goodhuman New Member

    78
    +41
    Bulgaria
    Christian
    Single
    Born again or saved means you become new creature, if you are completely new and changed inside you, your thinking then you are born again. Bible say born again cannot sin. So, if you feel you are new creature then you are new!
     
  14. Athanasius377

    Athanasius377 Is a little right of Atilla the Hun Supporter

    +1,180
    United States
    Lutheran
    Married
    US-Constitution
    Where you baptized? If yes, then you born again of water and the Spirit. Recall the Small Catechism:

    The Small Catechism - Book of Concord

    I'm not sure where you picked up some of these ideas but some of the things you write are not Lutheran. Of course we struggle daily in our sanctification. its the New man struggling against the Old man. The Old man knows his time is up and is in survival mode. Do not despair, remember Christ bled and died for your sins so trust in Him and His ability to save you. Pray daily for forgiveness and continue the struggle.

    Also, have you spoken with your pastor? Do you have a solid Lutheran pastor nearby you could speak with? I think that his counsel will do far more for you then anything you will read here on CF.
     
  15. Sunflower Garden

    Sunflower Garden New Member

    34
    +18
    United States
    Lutheran
    Private
    I agree, it's not supposed to be a feel-good experience. I'm learning that the hard way now. I was angry at that verse in the Bible once...but now I've come to accept it. I do believe the Bible is the infallible Word of God and have ever since.

    I'll tell you about what prompted me to become a Christian. I was raised Lutheran but became agnostic at age 12 because I didn't like what the religion taught about my sexuality. I lived that way for two years, but was really depressed and hopeless. I remember one night sitting in the car, and feeling compelled to pray to God. Because of my pride, I didn't answer. But it kept pulling at me. I kept researching Christianity, looked up what a reprobate was, etc. I stumbled across a band I like (because their music has helped me with my mental health) and saw that they were Christians (I didn't know that before). I remember thinking to myself, "if faith helped them, maybe it'll help me too." That wasn't the main motivation though, because I kept seeking, and I learned about sin, and why we need Jesus, etc. One night, I decided to accept Christ as my savior and I asked to start a relationship with Him. I felt so close to Him at first. I used to be a bully and bitter, but I became optimistic and forgiving. I could go into more details, but yeah. I felt like I was genuinely growing, I loved reading the Bible and talking to God. It was mainly just homosexuality I struggled with. I still questioned my affirming beliefs and tried to seek truth about it. I remember telling God that if I ever came to find out if I was wrong, I would become celibate. The fact that it took me two years to really accept it though...that scares me. What I had my chance and blew it? Should I just give up? I feel awful.
     
  16. Sunflower Garden

    Sunflower Garden New Member

    34
    +18
    United States
    Lutheran
    Private
    That's another thing I forgot to mention, I was baptized but I don't think it was valid. It was before I became a true believer (age 11, became agnostic just months after) and pouring, not immersion. I'm trying to find immersion baptism near me but I wanna figure out if I'm really born again yet.

    I'm struggling to trust Christ as I should, I used to feel really connected to Him and now I don't and I question if there was ever a relationship at all. I'm so focused on what I feel, but fruit feels absent in my life lately too.

    I have talked to my pastor (currently going to a presbyterian church because I can't attend the lutheran one in my area, but it's biblical and teaches the gospel including the harder parts so I like it). He says he thinks I'll be fine and the fact that I'm worried means the Spirit is working in me, but truth be told I don't think I've sensed the Holy Spirit in a long time..
    Besides, I don't wanna keep bothering people with the same old thing.

    I am talking to way too many people about this actually, like, multiple people. I wonder if this has gotten to a point where I seek the counsel of men over the counsel of God, mostly because I don't feel like I can hear God right now...I wonder if this is a matter of repentance.
     
  17. Tolworth John

    Tolworth John Well-Known Member

    +2,540
    United Kingdom
    Non-Denom
    Married
    Peter publicly denied Jesus, swearing that he did not know him.
    Jesus forgave him.

    Here is a difficult thing to do.
    Investigate what was involved in crucification, what the victim suffered, how they died, etc etc
    It is horrific reading and can give you nightmares, yet Jesus suffered that for you.

    He said'My Father has given you to me and I hold you in my hand. Nothing can snatch you out of m hand.'

    Please read 1John1:9 over confess our sins he (Jesus) is faithful and just and will FORGiVE us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.

    A few questions, doubts and sins is not going to cause him to let you go.
     
  18. Dave G.

    Dave G. Well-Known Member

    +3,322
    United States
    Christian
    Married
    Sunflower, the highest form of worship is being in scripture. But, right up there is in whatever you do you do it with your mind set towards God.

    When we backslide, we back in fellowship with God when we realize it, confess it and turn back on path. It may be some time before you feel anything but that doesn't change the truth in the matter. You're looking for experiential evidence but truth already is under way.

    We all struggle in the flesh, the apostle Paul included.
    Romans 7:15-20 New King James Version (NKJV)
    15 For what I am doing, I do not understand. For what I will to do, that I do not practice; but what I hate, that I do. 16 If, then, I do what I will not to do, I agree with the law that it is good. 17 But now, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells in me. 18 For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh) nothing good dwells; for to will is present with me, but how to perform what is good I do not find. 19 For the good that I will to do, I do not do; but the evil I will not to do, that I practice. 20 Now if I do what I will not to do, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells in me.
     
  19. Sunflower Garden

    Sunflower Garden New Member

    34
    +18
    United States
    Lutheran
    Private
    Is it normal for a Christian to find it hard to comprehend God's love like that? Like, even when I first became a Christian, I could never fully wrap my head around that. That I was known and died for before I was even born. That I'm loved that much. Like, it's been hard for the truth to truly penetrate my heart and soul...why? Does this mean I'm not elect? Why do I feel like Jesus died for a select group of people, but not me?
     
  20. Athanasius377

    Athanasius377 Is a little right of Atilla the Hun Supporter

    +1,180
    United States
    Lutheran
    Married
    US-Constitution
    If you baptism was done with water thrice times in the name of the Trinity it was valid. You don't need to be fully immersed. Also, how could you be a true believer if you were dead? I mean, how dead is dead? Read the following passage and tell me who is the one "doing" and who is the object of that action?

    11 In him also you were circumcised with a circumcision made without hands, by putting off the body of the flesh, by the circumcision of Christ, 12 having been buried with him in baptism, in which you were also raised with him through faith in the powerful working of God, who raised him from the dead. 13 And you, who were dead in your trespasses and the uncircumcision of your flesh, God made alive together with him, having forgiven us all our trespasses, 14 by canceling the record of debt that stood against us with its legal demands. This he set aside, nailing it to the cross.

    The Holy Bible: English Standard Version. (2016). (Col 2:11–14). Wheaton, IL: Crossway Bibles.

    So there is nothing you "do" here and in this context.

    This is good news. I would still keep talking with him because you need his counsel. And he is correct. If you really had blasphemed God the Holy Spirit we wouldn't be talking right now.
     
Loading...