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Pregnant Again

Bumble Bee

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It has been a roller coaster ride. My husband and I were in a good place a few months ago. Both of us had good jobs, we were beginning to save for a house. We thought, why not skip the condoms and see what happens? That week, he lost his job due to wrongful termination and I was informed that my program was being cut for lack of funding. And then I found out I was pregnant. Pregnancy isn’t very kind to my body, but I thought that the timing was perfect. I would be able to get an office job or even just be a sub and make my own schedule so I could focus on the kids and the pregnancy. And then I started bleeding. Not a ton, but I never bled with my boys so I went to the doctor. They said there was nothing they could do at 5 weeks and told me to go home. They said that if the bleeding increases, it was likely a miscarriage. They told me to test again the following week and that if it was positive we would evaluate from there. Otherwise, the pregnancy was over. I tested negative the following week.

I am pregnant again and kind of reeling. My hormone levels are a lot higher this time, if the dark lines are any indication. Husband is working a low wage job, and I’m waiting to hear back about the office job I interviewed for last Friday. I’m kind of having a hard time processing. I believe that I am five weeks along, with a due date of august 22, but that won’t be confirmed until I see my OB January 11. Her nurse thinks I am 10 weeks and that the bleeding in November was an anomaly, but I disagree. I would love it if that was the case, but I don’t believe it is. I’m just hoping to carry to term. I have had two early deliveries and two miscarriages.
 

Bumble Bee

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I don’t remember the last time I was so tired… my house is a disaster and my children running amok because I have barely the energy to sit upright with eyes open.
 
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