Pre Nup

[Savage78]

As many know I have a pre nuptual agreement that states that if my wife leaves me for any reason, I keep everything. The children the fixed assets and depending on the reason for leaving it is up to me what I give her if anything at all.

My wife has no intention of ever leaving me, so she signed the pre nup without blinking.

Now, I think that the court system in divorce is very harsh on the men, their ex wives use their money to find other mates. So men need to protect themselves from the very start of the marriage.

I found a few other women that I could consider marrying, they seemed to have good genetics so that my children would be good looking, but they refused to sign any pre nup, so i quit them on the spot.

What are your views on pre nups. I advise all men if you are getting married protect yourself...not all love is forever and you could pay for a mistaken love for the rest of your life.

 

[MooCar93]

I would sign one with my current bf (I have assets of my own I'd like to protect, and he has a son), but I just wanted to point out something - it's not just men who get hurt financially in the divorce process. Actually, statistically speaking, I've heard that men usually make out better financially, whereas women are more likely to keep the kids. Honestly (and this may just be a difference between the cultures we were brought up in, so I apologize in advance if this is harsh), this line of thinking is very Leykis 101-ish to me.

I'm also a bit curious as to why your children's appearance is so important to you. Would you love them less if you didn't find them physically attractive??

 

[quatona]

As many know I have a pre nuptual agreement that states that if my wife leaves me for any reason, I keep everything. The children the fixed assets and depending on the reason for leaving it is up to me what I give her if anything at all.

My wife has no intention of ever leaving me, so she signed the pre nup without blinking.

Now, I think that the court system in divorce is very harsh on the men, their ex wives use their money to find other mates. So men need to protect themselves from the very start of the marriage.

I found a few other women that I could consider marrying, they seemed to have good genetics so that my children would be good looking, but they refused to sign any pre nup, so i quit them on the spot.

What are your views on pre nups. I advise all men if you are getting married protect yourself...not all love is forever and you could pay for a mistaken love for the rest of your life.

Your understanding of marriage and partnership appears to be a technical, functional, mechnistic and material one - in which case a pre-nup makes perfect sense.
Your apparently very fundamental misanthropy (or is it mysogony or plain and simple mild paranoia) also suggests this move as inevitable.

I personally wouldn´t marry a woman whom I would suspect to not consider my interests in case of a split up, and I wouldn´t marry a woman who suspects me not to consider her interests in case of a split up.
Neither would I marry a person who so obviously displays that she is concerned with her own material interests more than anything else, as you do in this post.

Completely different paradigms, I guess.

 

[chipmunk]

Hah! I'm not going to sign any prenuptial aggreements. If some guy goes into a marriage wanting to protect what is his, then he and I have very different ideas of marriage from the start. He probably also thinks very little of me and I'd laugh in his face and it would most likely prompt me to dump him on the spot. If after getting to know me well enough to want to marry me he thinks I am going to want a dime of what he earns after a split up (which may never happen), then he doesn't know me well at all. Also, I'm sure not going to sign a paper giving someone custody to any children we possibly have together in the event of divorce. What if the reason I'm divorcing this guy is something that I don't want the children around? I wasn't predicting a divorce with this guy, but apparently something changed my mind.

If I get married and then something like a divorce occurs I would try to have everything evenly split down the middle. Well, as well as this could be done. I've never experienced divorce, but I have broken up with someone I was living with and we basically worked things out this way. The things we aquired together we gave to the person who would get the most use out of them. We mostly kept the things we came into the relationship with.

 

[billwald]

Would not want to marry a woman that . . . don't want to insult someone I have not met but you invite it . . . simple minded and trusting? If you should flip out and go bjerk? Start messing with the kids?

 

[Angel4Truth]

If you didnt trust her that much, why did you marry her?

Did she know you "quit" so many other women who wouldnt sign your agreement? Is it really that easy to 'love' so many other women beforehand?

 

[Savage78]

I would sign one with my current bf (I have assets of my own I'd like to protect, and he has a son), but I just wanted to point out something - it's not just men who get hurt financially in the divorce process. Actually, statistically speaking, I've heard that men usually make out better financially, whereas women are more likely to keep the kids. Honestly (and this may just be a difference between the cultures we were brought up in, so I apologize in advance if this is harsh), this line of thinking is very Leykis 101-ish to me.

I'm also a bit curious as to why your children's appearance is so important to you. Would you love them less if you didn't find them physically attractive??

True the pre nup should be to protect, so then you should get one if you desire.

However, I do agree sometimes the woman gets hurt. What I have seen is that the woman keeps the children, the house and then the man has to pay her alimoney.

As for my children, well its not that I will love them any less, but more doors open for attractive people then for ugly ones.

 

[Savage78]

Your understanding of marriage and partnership appears to be a technical, functional, mechnistic and material one - in which case a pre-nup makes perfect sense.
Your apparently very fundamental misanthropy (or is it mysogony or plain and simple mild paranoia) also suggests this move as inevitable.

I personally wouldn´t marry a woman whom I would suspect to not consider my interests in case of a split up, and I wouldn´t marry a woman who suspects me not to consider her interests in case of a split up.
Neither would I marry a person who so obviously displays that she is concerned with her own material interests more than anything else, as you do in this post.

Completely different paradigms, I guess.

A marriage is a business arrangement at best. You can live with someone and not be married and not love them any less or once you are merried not love them any more than you did.

 

[Savage78]

Hah! I'm not going to sign any prenuptial aggreements. If some guy goes into a marriage wanting to protect what is his, then he and I have very different ideas of marriage from the start. He probably also thinks very little of me and I'd laugh in his face and it would most likely prompt me to dump him on the spot.

Excellent.

If after getting to know me well enough to want to marry me he thinks I am going to want a dime of what he earns after a split up (which may never happen), then he doesn't know me well at all. Also, I'm sure not going to sign a paper giving someone custody to any children we possibly have together in the event of divorce. What if the reason I'm divorcing this guy is something that I don't want the children around? I wasn't predicting a divorce with this guy, but apparently something changed my mind.

You could change your mind and want vengenace and take him for all he is worth.

If I get married and then something like a divorce occurs I would try to have everything evenly split down the middle.

What if lets say for example, in your joint account you had a million dollars, he contributed $900,000 to it and you only contibuted $100,000 would you still go after half, or 1/10?

 

[Mskedi]

So how is your wife protected should you decide to leave her? And how is your wife protected if you, say, develop an alcohol problem or drug problem and she decides to leave you for her own protection and the protection of your children? I think that's a pretty horrid prenup, personally.

By getting married I've decided I can share everything with my husband. I'm aware that if we split he'll make out pretty good (I make a lot more money), but that's a risk I'm taking by believing that we'll make it. If either of us doubted the other enough to need the prenup, we wouldn't have gotten married.

 

[Angel4Truth]

Marriage is much more than a buisness arrangment for a christian. So the answers on the ethics of a prenuptual agreement would automatically vary quite widely from a believers point of veiw and an atheists point of veiw especially if the atheist sees it as nothing more than a buisness arrangement. But having seen that statement about your views , its apparant why you would need a prenup.

 

[Savage78]

Would not want to marry a woman that . . . don't want to insult someone I have not met but you invite it . . . simple minded and trusting?

No I did not invite insults to the mother of my firstborn legitimate son. However mywife carries several qualifications, so I doubt that calling her simple minded is really correct.

And what is wrong with being trusting...being trustin means no pre nup as well?

If you should flip out and go bjerk? Start messing with the kids?

There are clauses that cover that, a prenup is a huge document. Also she chose her spouse carefully as well.

 

[Savage78]

If you didnt trust her that much, why did you marry her?

The issue is not one of trust, it is protecting what I have for my first born male child.

Did she know you "quit" so many other women who wouldnt sign your agreement? Is it really that easy to 'love' so many other women beforehand?

Yes, I did not lie to her or omit anything. Love is something that grows.

 

[Savage78]

Marriage is much more than a buisness arrangment for a christian.

On the contrary, early christians married into families and children getting married were a way to solidify alliances etc between houses.

So are you saying that if you didnt marry your husband, you would love him any less?

So the answers on the ethics of a prenuptual agreement would automatically vary quite widely from a believers point of veiw and an atheists point of veiw especially if the atheist sees it as nothing more than a buisness arrangement. But having seen that statement about your views , its apparant why you would need a prenup.

As I said I am protecting my assets for my firstborn male child.

 

[Mling]

any pre-nup I sign will go something like this:

barring extreme events, we will not get divorced. When we are 40 and the kids are driving us up the wall and we are in debt and times are tough we will remember "this too shall pass." We will remember that we married for love and both will make a deliberate and conscious effort to meet each other's needs before the other is forced to think selfishly in order to meet them herself. We will remember that mistakes are made and almost no mistake is worth automatically ending the relationship. When severe mistakes are made we will consider what caused them and how they can be fixed.
Above all, even if divorce is deemed necessary, we will remember that we love each other and care for each other to the best of our abilities.

 

[Angel4Truth]

So are you saying that if you didnt marry your husband, you would love him any less?

Of course i would love him less if i didnt marry him , because we would have never become one in Spirit as well as in the physical sense. Again , marriage is much more than a business arrangement to a christian.

 

[Savage78]

So how is your wife protected should you decide to leave her?

I give her money, she invests wisely and that is hers and hers alone.

And how is your wife protected if you, say, develop an alcohol problem or drug problem and she decides to leave you for her own protection and the protection of your children? I think that's a pretty horrid prenup, personally.

I do not consume alcohol, however should I for whatever reason be unable to carry out my duties with a sound mind..all my assets go to estate and are run as I have already stipulated. As I said she has invested wisely withthe money I have given her.

By getting married I've decided I can share everything with my husband. I'm aware that if we split he'll make out pretty good (I make a lot more money), but that's a risk I'm taking by believing that we'll make it. If either of us doubted the other enough to need the prenup, we wouldn't have gotten married.

Pre nups are not about doubt, its about protection. Would you have sex with someone you loved without protection before getting a HIV/AIDS test?

 

[Savage78]

Of course i would love him less if i didnt marry him , because we would have never become one in Spirit as well as in the physical sense. Again , marriage is much more than a business arrangement to a christian.

Well then, your love is not really love if you need a piece of metal and paper to make you fall more in love.

 

[Angel4Truth]

What does metal and paper have to do with the Spirit? you completely glossed what i said didnt you. A Spiritual union in marriage with each other and Christ is something a nonbeliever/skeptic cannot experience. Its no wonder you missed that in what i stated.

 

[Angel4Truth]

You are who only has metal and a peice of paper. (oh and a prenup peice of paper)