I don't think my difficulties fit very neatly into OCD, but my doctor in the past has said to me he didn't think my 'obsession' had gone. I never asked what he meant by obsession at the time, and I can't recall clearly if I had said something to him previously to give him the impression I had an obsession. I do recall being a bit fussy about things like stacking magazines very neatly in my teens, and maybe wondered about myself a bit. Is it possible to give oneself a condition by thinking one might have it? I have read a bit about the classic form of OCD and how it affects people.
I suspect I have a religious personality. I have been told I am not schizophrenic, or bi-polar however.
Another thing my doctor has said was that I had a personality disorder, that I "lashed out"... To be honest I don't want to think that about myself in case it ends up in my doing so. I think I have lashed out at times in the past, and seemingly for no reason. I have tried to analyse why I did, but I don't think it I can get behind it.
I'd like to get help, but I honestly am not sure what sort psychotherapy is going to help, I feel I need the right therapist and modality, and I am not sure how motivated I am. I have gone for christian counselling, non-christian group psychotherapy, and CBT in the past and it hasn't helped a lot. In fact on occasion its been quite unbearable because don't feel I can talk about what's behind the intense anxiety, because its related to ideations about myself that I am not sure they would understand.
My problems and my ways of coping seem to me unbelievably complicated and then some, that I doubt whether anyone could grasp what is going on.
I am on a couple of meds, escitalopram, and quetiapine, but wonder at times if I would be better on something like valium, or xanax? but its pretty much at the doctors discretion, and they just say we find this works for a lot of people so first we try this, then if we need to we up the dose, etc.
What exactly is a "obsessional personality", or obsessional neurosis? And what sort of help is there for it?
I suspect I have a religious personality. I have been told I am not schizophrenic, or bi-polar however.
Another thing my doctor has said was that I had a personality disorder, that I "lashed out"... To be honest I don't want to think that about myself in case it ends up in my doing so. I think I have lashed out at times in the past, and seemingly for no reason. I have tried to analyse why I did, but I don't think it I can get behind it.
I'd like to get help, but I honestly am not sure what sort psychotherapy is going to help, I feel I need the right therapist and modality, and I am not sure how motivated I am. I have gone for christian counselling, non-christian group psychotherapy, and CBT in the past and it hasn't helped a lot. In fact on occasion its been quite unbearable because don't feel I can talk about what's behind the intense anxiety, because its related to ideations about myself that I am not sure they would understand.
My problems and my ways of coping seem to me unbelievably complicated and then some, that I doubt whether anyone could grasp what is going on.
I am on a couple of meds, escitalopram, and quetiapine, but wonder at times if I would be better on something like valium, or xanax? but its pretty much at the doctors discretion, and they just say we find this works for a lot of people so first we try this, then if we need to we up the dose, etc.
What exactly is a "obsessional personality", or obsessional neurosis? And what sort of help is there for it?