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Never been.....

peteey

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Okay I am kind of ashamed to come out and say this, especially in a society that is so based on this kind of thing, but I am 23 almost 24, and never have been really offically kissed! i've dated a couple of times, but it never got to far....is that a total turn off to guys?
Is there something wrong with me? Do i have my standards set to high? I get really self conscious around guys that I like, so a lot of guys probably think I am snotty. But I am totally normal around guys that I know are "taken" and can be the total goof that I am....how do i loosen up around guys? :confused:
 
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Echoes Peak

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peteey said:
Okay I am kind of ashamed to come out and say this, especially in a society that is so based on this kind of thing, but I am 23 almost 24, and never have been really offically kissed! i've dated a couple of times, but it never got to far....is that a total turn off to guys?
Is there something wrong with me? Do i have my standards set to high? I get really self conscious around guys that I like, so a lot of guys probably think I am snotty. But I am totally normal around guys that I know are "taken" and can be the total goof that I am....how do i loosen up around guys? :confused:

You are SOOOOOOOOO not weird. I think its kinda cool personally. Then maybe you will truly appreciate it when it happens. I've kissed people and I can't say all were enjoyable necessarily.

Also, I think quite a few people have a hard time around people they like. I would just relax and just be yourself. Realize you don't have to be in the business of impressing people with your dazzling good lucks and incredible wit in order for them to like you. They should be able to see that for themselves whether you're goofy or serious. :D
 
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Higgaion

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Hey, I can relate to what you're sayin'. I'm rather introverted and never kissed anyone or really dated for that matter. And now that I have some of the perspective that age brings, I think that if and when I'm ever married I'll be glad that I saved everything (including smooches).
 
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peteey

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That is what a lot of my married friends say....some who didn't have a relationship before their spouse said it was worth the wait, and ones who did have a different relationship before their spouse said they felt they wasted a lot on the wrong person. But if it's all racked up as experience can it be wrong? :)
 
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stubbornkelly

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It's a turn off to some, but not to others. Most guys I know, when they're being really honest, like the idea that they might be someone's first. It won't be a turn off to the guy that's right for you.

As for loosening up around guys you're interested in, that's something you just have to force. I know that sounds weird, but you have to work on opening up. I'm not a very extroverted person at all, and had to just make myself be more outgoing. It wasn't working the way I was doing it, after all.
 
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wvmtnkid

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Don't sweat it peteey! I wasn't "officially kissed" until I was 25. If the fellow really loves you, this doesn't matter to him. What matters to him is that he loves you and wants to make you happy and he will take your feelings into consideration.

If he gives you a hard time about it or makes fun of you because of it, he is probably someone you don't need to be with to begin with. Just my .02 cents.
 
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LifeInYou

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ack! my first kiss was awful! I was fifteen and I made my boyfriend wait 3 months to kiss me because i wanted to see if he was willing to wait and plus- i was SO nervous!! bleh...i feel bad for him, i had no idea what I was doing!! haha... well, all I can say is- I was in your shoes! It's okay to want it to be meaningful. In my mind, that's the only way to go about relationships....(engaging yourself ONLY when it is meaningful)
 
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ps34_18

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you're better off waiting until it's meaningful. I didn't realize how meaningful it's actually supposed to be until I was kissed and it wasn't meaningful, and I ended up feeling very used. And even though I had wanted the guy to kiss me because I'd never been kissed before, I realize now how big of a mistake it was, and I totally regret not waiting until I met that special someone.
 
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hamster_head

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peteey said:
Okay I am kind of ashamed to come out and say this, especially in a society that is so based on this kind of thing, but I am 23 almost 24, and never have been really offically kissed! i've dated a couple of times, but it never got to far....is that a total turn off to guys?
Is there something wrong with me? Do i have my standards set to high? I get really self conscious around guys that I like, so a lot of guys probably think I am snotty. But I am totally normal around guys that I know are "taken" and can be the total goof that I am....how do i loosen up around guys? :confused:


It's actually a huge turn on to me to know a girl hasn't been kissed. There is a lot of emotional stress you have to go through hearing about someone's "Ex", so it's great whenever you can skip that. ^_^
 
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Buskanaka

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It's actually a huge turn on to me to know a girl hasn't been kissed. There is a lot of emotional stress you have to go through hearing about someone's "Ex", so it's great whenever you can skip that. ^_^
I agree totally! :D I think it's more of a turn off to have been kissed and been in lots of relationships before. The guy that is right for you will like you because of everything you are, ESPECIALLY the unique ways you are different from everybody else. But never having been kissed or been in a dating relationship before is definitely a good thing!
 
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Grommit

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peteey said:
Okay I am kind of ashamed to come out and say this, especially in a society that is so based on this kind of thing, but I am 23 almost 24, and never have been really offically kissed! i've dated a couple of times, but it never got to far....is that a total turn off to guys?
Is there something wrong with me? Do i have my standards set to high? I get really self conscious around guys that I like, so a lot of guys probably think I am snotty. But I am totally normal around guys that I know are "taken" and can be the total goof that I am....how do i loosen up around guys? :confused:
There is no need to be ashamed. I think that's totally cool! :p

I perfer to marry a virgin but I also knew in this day and age that would be hard to come by and I thought my wife would be partly soiled, but, wow. As a guy, I must admit, I think it's awesome to know there are still pure girls around. ;)

Go ahead and keep your standards high but keep them realistic. There is no perfect guy so don't waste your time looking for him. there are only real people with real problems. Just make sure the guy is walking with the lord. It will help in many ways.

As for loosening up around guys, well... kissing them might help! (heh, Kidding!) Just be yourself. I like girls who are themselves. What more can I say? (really, what more can I say? I just dont know. Sorry. heh)

Oh btw, I'm 25 and never been kissed either. I've never dated anyone as well let alone held a girls hand on a romantic level. maybe I am the freak?

Just be sure you can cook well and you will be ok. :D
 
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wvmtnkid

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Grommit said:
There is no need to be ashamed. I think that's totally cool! :p

I perfer to marry a virgin but I also knew in this day and age that would be hard to come by and I thought my wife would be partly soiled, but, wow. As a guy, I must admit, I think it's awesome to know there are still pure girls around. ;)

Go ahead and keep your standards high but keep them realistic. There is no perfect guy so don't waste your time looking for him. there are only real people with real problems. Just make sure the guy is walking with the lord. It will help in many ways.

As for loosening up around guys, well... kissing them might help! (heh, Kidding!) Just be yourself. I like girls who are themselves. What more can I say? (really, what more can I say? I just dont know. Sorry. heh)

Oh btw, I'm 25 and never been kissed either. I've never dated anyone as well let alone held a girls hand on a romantic level. maybe I am the freak?

Just be sure you can cook well and you will be ok. :D

Awwwww, that is a nice post. I wish I would have known that guys felt like this years ago. It would have sure taken some of the heat off of dating pressure. The girl that wins your heart will certainly be blessed, Grommit!
 
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wvmtnkid

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Rainbow. said:
I think your lucky!
If i could turn back the clock and never have kissed a lot of the guys i did, i would be very happy right now!!
Save yourself for the wonderful man that God blesses you with! ;)
:amen: Good advice!
 
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