Not sure where to post this, it is quite sexual in nature and a past sexual problem for me. I recently got into a relationship with a young lady. I'm 35, she's 26. I have never been in a relationship. I have never kissed anyone. I don't even kiss my mother on the cheek. I've been looking all over trying to find the exact problem I have and haven't been to successful. I'm finding out that even just holding hands will get me aroused. I'm not thinking anything lustful. I'm just aroused. I'm confused. Is it that most people who do kiss and hold hands have those feelings of arousal, but don't act on them? Or if you do have those feelings you shouldn't be doing those things at all? When I see other Christian couples engaging in physical affection I'm wondering how do they do it? I've seen it many times where the GF sits on or between the BF's legs. This doesn't bring on arousal? I can't see how not? Anyway, last night I talked about these issues with my girlfriend and we have different opinions. She believes just don't act upon them (feeling aroused) and I believe don't do it at all. Last night we were going crazy, wanting really bad to kiss, but not doing so (on my part). We both believe no sex before marriage, I told her to slap me if I passed boundaries. She has had experience with an Ex. And unfortunately I've always wanted the women to take control, since, I'm inexperienced. I also have repressed feelings (love, infatuation,etc) for years. Telling myself I don't need them. Now these feeling are coming out and making it very difficult. Any thoughts, suggestions or similarities?
-
Starting today August 7th, 2024, in order to post in the Married Couples, Courting Couples, or Singles forums, you will not be allowed to post if you have your Marital status designated as private. Announcements will be made in the respective forums as well but please note that if yours is currently listed as Private, you will need to submit a ticket in the Support Area to have yours changed.
-
CF has always been a site that welcomes people from different backgrounds and beliefs to participate in discussion and even debate. That is the nature of its ministry. In view of recent events emotions are running very high. We need to remind people of some basic principles in debating on this site. We need to be civil when we express differences in opinion. No personal attacks. Avoid you, your statements. Don't characterize an entire political party with comparisons to Fascism or Communism or other extreme movements that committed atrocities. CF is not the place for broad brush or blanket statements about groups and political parties. Put the broad brushes and blankets away when you come to CF, better yet, put them in the incinerator. Debate had no place for them. We need to remember that people that commit acts of violence represent themselves or a small extreme faction.
Need advice
- Thread starter Aspireman
- Start date
- Aug 30, 2008
- 6,877
- 3,139
- Country
- Australia
- Gender
- Male
- Faith
- Christian
- Marital Status
- Married
Upvote
0
dayhiker
Mature veteran
- Sep 13, 2006
- 15,562
- 5,307
- Gender
- Male
- Faith
- Charismatic
- Marital Status
- In Relationship
- Politics
- US-Others
Hi Aspireman ....
What your experiencing is pretty common. That's what happened to me when I was young.
Once the newness of holding hands wears off then it wouldn't be so bad. I want to say that I think
its great that you two talked about who you were feeling. I think that is very healthy.
What your experiencing is pretty common. That's what happened to me when I was young.
Once the newness of holding hands wears off then it wouldn't be so bad. I want to say that I think
its great that you two talked about who you were feeling. I think that is very healthy.
Upvote
0
Sounds like you need to gain confidence, Aspire, and not only in yourself but in God. Stay much in communion with the Lord Jesus, and if you have confessed Him as your Savior who loves you and died for you, then make Him lord of your life and best Friend. He will show you how to manage life and interpersonal relations if you stay in communion with Him.
Upvote
0
Similar threads
