My story - help in any way is appreciated

[Kyoko]

Hi everyone,

This is my first post on these forums. I hope to frequent this place far more. I want to start off by telling you all about my lack of faith.

I have never been baptized, but I have been brought up in a Christian family and have learnt about Christianity and used to attend church. I have always struggled with faith, and would have on and off periods of really believing in Jesus and then I would go off and do something that is sinful.

I have always known what is sinful and what is not, and I am touched that Jesus has died for us and redeemed our sins. Yet i still gamble, struggle with a porn addiction, swear and basically do many things that I know is frowned upon in Christianity.

My girlfriend has a different religion that believes in reincarnation, and I am trying to introduce her to Christianity but it is so hard because I am not very Christian like myself, rather a lost seeker. I'm ashamed to say I have had pre-marital sex and still continue to do so, it seems that I simply cannot help myself. I also struggle with questions that she asks me, such as "Why did God allow some people to be born into poverty and other people get the silver spoon?" and other difficult questions like that, which I am finding very difficult to answer.

At times I feel inspired but I believe that is just a product of me feeling good about myself. I also have anger management issues and I tend to dislike people very much as soon as I meet them. I have drifted between churches and the last church i left, was because I didn't like the people and they would play on their mobile phones while the priest was delivering the sermon and I got really irritated about that and never returned.

I also didn't like hearing about the Planetshakers priest pretending that he had cancer, and things like that. I do understand however that everyone struggles with Christianity at one point in their life.

At this point in time I am still lost, still looking for all the answers that will help me understand Christianity and help me implement His way into my life.

Please, any advice is much appreciated. Thank you so much for taking the time to read this.

 

[aiki]

Hey, Kyoko! Welcome to Christianforums!

I have never been baptized, but I have been brought up in a Christian family and have learnt about Christianity and used to attend church. I have always struggled with faith, and would have on and off periods of really believing in Jesus and then I would go off and do something that is sinful.

Just so you're clear on this important point: Baptism, going to church, paying tithe, attending prayer meetings - none of these things makes you a Christian. As Jesus said to the Pharisee, Nicodemus, when he asked how to be a Christian, "You must be born again." This is a spiritual thing, a matter of the heart, not just of right conduct.

I have always known what is sinful and what is not, and I am touched that Jesus has died for us and redeemed our sins.

You probably meant this, but Jesus didn't "redeem our sins," he redeemed us from the consequences of our sin.

Yet i still gamble, struggle with a porn addiction, swear and basically do many things that I know is frowned upon in Christianity.

You do these things, I suspect, for the same reasons we all do things that are wrong: You want to do them. At least, you want to do them more than you want not to do them. God makes us all a promise, though. He warns us that when we sin, we will suffer - sooner, or later. And this is why God is so careful to command us not to sin. He doesn't want us to suffer!

Its tempting to think God is just interfering with our fun when He says not to do those things we like to do. But, actually, He is simply trying to protect us and to move us toward the kind of life that will be the most rewarding and fulfilling. Often, however, we have to be damaged - sometimes quite a lot - by the destructive consequences of our sin before we see the wisdom in God's commands and are sufficiently motivated to do things His way.

My girlfriend has a different religion that believes in reincarnation, and I am trying to introduce her to Christianity but it is so hard because I am not very Christian like myself, rather a lost seeker.

I appreciate that you're trying to urge her toward Christianity, but doing so in your present condition is just, well, hypocritical. Every word of truth you speak to her is corrupted by the un-Christian things you do. She knows, I'm sure, that what you really believe and value can be seen in what you do, not in what you say.

I'm ashamed to say I have had pre-marital sex and still continue to do so, it seems that I simply cannot help myself.

In a sense, you cannot help yourself. Only God can break the power of sin in a person's life. But you're still going to "reap the whirlwind" of your sin. Don't forget: The more you sow, the more you reap. When the reaping begins, maybe then you'll take God more seriously.

I also struggle with questions that she asks me, such as "Why did God allow some people to be born into poverty and other people get the silver spoon?" and other difficult questions like that, which I am finding very difficult to answer.

The answer is quite simple: Sin. Also, God's interest isn't really in the nature of person's circumstances but in their relationship to Him. A man can "gain the whole world and lose his own soul." Being wealthy often creates a sense of independence from God that can be eternally fatal. Being needy, being poor, actually has some advantages over being rich - at least as far as being dependent on God is concerned, which is a very good thing.

At times I feel inspired but I believe that is just a product of me feeling good about myself. I also have anger management issues and I tend to dislike people very much as soon as I meet them. I have drifted between churches and the last church i left, was because I didn't like the people and they would play on their mobile phones while the priest was delivering the sermon and I got really irritated about that and never returned.

It seems kinda' hypocritical of you to be irritated with folks for using their cell phones in church while you are gambling and fornicating and swearing. Maybe your anger is just misplaced. Perhaps you're really just angry with yourself and this spills over into how you feel about others.

At this point in time I am still lost, still looking for all the answers that will help me understand Christianity and help me implement His way into my life.

Please, any advice is much appreciated. Thank you so much for taking the time to read this.

The answer for you is the answer for all who need God: Jesus Christ. But do you want him? It doesn't yet seem so. Ask God to make you hungry for him.

John 3:36
36 He who believes in the Son has everlasting life; and he who does not believe the Son shall not see life, but the wrath of God abides on him.

I'll be praying for you.

Peace.

 

[ephraimanesti]

I have never been baptized, but I have been brought up in a Christian family and have learnt about Christianity and used to attend church. I have always struggled with faith, and would have on and off periods of really believing in Jesus and then I would go off and do something that is sinful.

MY DEAR BROTHER,

Yes!--i can relate to this experience. i have spent much of my life bouncing back and forth between the darkness and the Light.

I have always known what is sinful and what is not, and I am touched that Jesus has died for us and redeemed our sins. Yet i still gamble, struggle with a porn addiction, swear and basically do many things that I know is frowned upon in Christianity.

i would hazard a guess that one of your major difficulties in this regard is that you "know" and "are touched" by the Truths of Christianity but they have yet to migrate downwards--from your head to your Heart. This "migration" is in large part a gift of God and must be prayed for fervently.

My girlfriend has a different religion that believes in reincarnation, and I am trying to introduce her to Christianity but it is so hard because I am not very Christian like myself, rather a lost seeker.

Yes, you are correct--YOU CANNOT GIVE TO OTHERS WHAT YOU DO NOT POSSESS YOURSELF!

I'm ashamed to say I have had pre-marital sex and still continue to do so, it seems that I simply cannot help myself.

Don't confuse "cannot" with "will not"--this is a very important distinction! If you REALLY wished to--you would. Your problem is that you are not sufficiently motivated to pray for the necessary strength to accomplish what you claim you wish to do. "All things are possible to God."

I also struggle with questions that she asks me, such as "Why did God allow some people to be born into poverty and other people get the silver spoon?" and other difficult questions like that, which I am finding very difficult to answer.

Yes, they would be difficult! To answer questions such as the above and to understand the true answers requires to guidance and wisdom of the Holy Spirit and, as Scriptures tell us, the Holy Spirit only dwells in temples which have been cleansed as per I Corinthians 3:16, 17.

At times I feel inspired but I believe that is just a product of me feeling good about myself. I also have anger management issues and I tend to dislike people very much as soon as I meet them. I have drifted between churches and the last church i left, was because I didn't like the people and they would play on their mobile phones while the priest was delivering the sermon and I got really irritated about that and never returned.

I also didn't like hearing about the Planetshakers priest pretending that he had cancer, and things like that.

Best to leave the judging of others to God and focus STRICTLY on yourself and what you need to do to get yourself connected to God--if, indeed, that is what you wish to do. Judging others just precludes your being able to allow God to do anything for yourself. We are judged by God as we judge others. Tis a huge and lethal trap, bro!

I do understand however that everyone struggles with Christianity at one point in their life.

Yes, this is true. i am, however, wondering exactly how hard you are struggling and what you are willing to let go of in your present "life" in order for God to aid you in winning that struggle.

At this point in time I am still lost, still looking for all the answers that will help me understand Christianity and help me implement His way into my life.

The answers are ALL in the New Testament--just read it and follow directions. So simple a child can do it--in fact, our Lord says we must become as little children to accomplish the task of entering the Kingdom.

Please, any advice is much appreciated. Thank you so much for taking the time to read this.

El gusto es mio! May you be blessed!

ABBA'S FOOL,
ephraim

P.S. You might check out Eastern Orthodoxy--it worked wonders for me!

 

[Kyoko]

Thanks so much for your advice. I will look into it.

 

[ephraimanesti]

Thanks so much for your advice. I will look into it.

MY BROTHER,

It seems that you have already "looked into it." Abba--your Heavenly Father--seeks a relationship which requires action rather than mere curiosity. What is it YOU want in the depths of your Heart?

ABBA'S FOOL,
ephraim

 

[Kyoko]

I want to accept Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior, but I haven't felt any affinity with him nor felt inspired. What's Abba's Fool ???

 

[ephraimanesti]

I want to accept Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior, but I haven't felt any affinity with him nor felt inspired.

MY BROTHER,

Of course you don't feel any "affinity with Him"--you have placed yourself on the outside looking in. How can you possibly feel an "affinity" with a Person you have yet to meet. i don't feel any affinity with the family living across the street whom i have never met. If i wished to "feel affinity with them", i would walk across the street, knock on their door, introduce myself, and invite them over for dinner.

What "inspiration" are you seeking? Have you not read the New Testament yet, have you not evaluated it's desirability, and have you not made a choice as to whether you want the new Life described in the Gospels or whether you would rather keep the old life you have now.

"Inspiration" is just another word for motivation, but i think you are perhaps waiting for a fiery bush to appear on your front lawn before making a move. In all actuality, God has served--about 2000 years ago--and the ball is in your court. What ya gonna do wit it?

What's Abba's Fool ???

"ABBA" is what Jesus called His Heavenly Father. It is roughly translated "Daddy" or "Papa." It is Jesus' description of Who and What God the Father is and the depth of His Love for us, His children. He is so different from the stern judgmental tyrannical Father that many of us tend to picture!

If you knew me better, you would consider the "fool" part self-explanatory!

Actually/seriously, it has to do with Paul's injunction: "If any one of you thinks he is wise by the standards of this age, he should become a 'fool' so that he may become wise." (I Corinthians 3:18)

An interesting sermonette on this subject can be found at:
www.firstparishyork.org/full-backup/sermons/fools.html]Fools For Christ

ABBA'S FOOL,
ephraim

 

[salida]

Why is there poor? Because its a fallen world-thus, there are evil governments and their citizens get oppressed. There is plenty of land to grow food for all of mankind-but evil men get in the way of this and hurt the citizens.

God doesn't stop the wicked because all of mankind has a free will.

Concept of christianity: Are u a good person? The Good Test


But those who are given much-more is required like giving to the poor.

Also, visit www.TheBibleProofBook.com


Ask the Holy Spirit to fill your life. Are u daily praying and reading the bible? Do u surround yourself with friends who are inspirational? If your not doing this, you won't have the power to live a christian life.

 

[Kyoko]

Thanks for all your help. I'm happy to say I've been going to some Christian courses and church with my girlfriend and we've been attending regularly. We've also stopped all the fornication, which is very hard for us (over a month clean now) but we know its right to stop. Of course, I've actively tried to stop other sinful ways which is going alright too.

We both have been praying and reading the Bible and talking to God, and we will continue doing this diligently. There is a problem however, her parents are very strong believers in Buddhism and if they ever found out she was going against Buddhism (she was raised in it), such as eating beef, she will get 'disowned' by her family, as she says.

Thus she found it 'impossible' to fully accept Jesus Christ as her Saviour because she says she doesn't want to let go of her family. I had no answer for this but all I've been doing is pray. Her parents will not approve of me either as a Christian, they want me to be buddhist but I cannot ever reject the truth.

Rarely they want me to do buddha things such as bow to the Buddha shrine, and I have complied which I wasn't sure was the right thing to do, to respect other religions, I have asked God if it was okay to do this because I do not want to offend her parents, but I'm not sure if it's okay or not. I would say it's not but I do not want to offend the parents.

Also my grandparents may or may not have known Christ but I don't think they ever accepted Him, and since their passing many years ago, does that mean they are not saved and therefore are in Hell? Because that is a very hard thing to swallow.

Any thoughts?

Thank you for listening.

 

[seekthelord]

Hi KYOKO,
An unbaptised adult = not a christian

 

[zaksmummy]

Hi KYOKO,
An unbaptised adult = not a christian

Rubbish.

 

[zaksmummy]

You sound like you have come a long way on your spiritual journey since your first post. The most important thing about being a christian is repentance - that is what makes you a christian. Repentance is turning away from sin, asking Gods forgiveness, and going in the other direction, which from what you have said is what you have both done. Baptism is the next step, an act of obedience to God and spiritual purification.

On the matter of doing things like bowing to Buddha. One thing God hates is idolatry, which is probably why you were so uneasy about bowing to the statue. My parents friends were missionaries in India, and often came across idol worship and were asked if they would worship this god or that god. One of the things they would do is politely say to the people "thank you, it is not my custom" and this would suffice as an explanation. I think you need to tread carefully but, with Gods help you can overcome the problems with your girlfriends parents.

Also remind her that just because she now loves God doesnt mean she loves her family any less, God loves her family too.

As to your grandparents, you cannot know whether they are with God or not - no one can - I have similar thoughts about my grandma whom I loved dearly. Just leave them to God - he is a righteous judge, and one who loves mercy above all else.

 

[Kyoko]

Thanks for that zaksmummy

 

[znr]

Rubbish.

Thank you.