My relationships never work out... Is this Jesus way of telling me I am to be single?

[Ave Maria]

Hi everyone. My relationships never work out for me. I've had a lot of relationships and none of them ever worked out for me. Is this God's way of telling me that I am meant to be single?

 

[Memento Mori]

No, this is God's way of telling you to figure out why your relationships suck. When you're in a relationship, how is the communication? What kind of guys do you get with? Those are the kinds of questions it's time to ask.

 

[Ave Maria]

No, this is God's way of telling you to figure out why your relationships suck. When you're in a relationship, how is the communication? What kind of guys do you get with? Those are the kinds of questions it's time to ask.

Hmmm, ok. But how do you know it's not God's way of telling me that I'm meant to be single?

I always seem to end up with people who controlling and I hate it. Thing is, I don't really know how to tell someone whose going to be controlling and someone who isn't from the beginning.

 

[mg0086]

Hmmm, ok. But how do you know it's not God's way of telling me that I'm meant to be single?

I always seem to end up with people who controlling and I hate it. Thing is, I don't really know how to tell someone whose going to be controlling and someone who isn't from the beginning.

I've been wondering that myself. I've had a nice boyfriend whom I would still be with if...well...if he were still alive. I've had one that cheats, one that appearantly I turned gay...and my most recent was my ex-fiancee who let his arrogance get in the way...

But I don't think it means I'm doomed (I know...I did write a poem on this...). And one way to keep from getting controlling men is to gain some independance. Don't let anyone walk all over you or try to keep you from doing the things you want to do.

Sure you found you loved him when you first met him, but then red flags go up when he begs you to stay home from church to pay attention to him. Or when you go with the girls shopping and he can't seem to stop calling you every three seconds.

One way to stop that is tell him "don't you trust me?"..."If you don't it's over..."

Initiative is important. BE strong! I start getting suspicious once they start keeping me from things I really want to do....

 

[mg0086]

Try...try again my friend. Don't give up and God won't keep you single when you don't wanna be...

Remember, ask and you shall recieve!

 

[Memento Mori]

Hmmm, ok. But how do you know it's not God's way of telling me that I'm meant to be single?

I always seem to end up with people who controlling and I hate it. Thing is, I don't really know how to tell someone whose going to be controlling and someone who isn't from the beginning.

This is just my opinion, but I think failed relationships signal a need for insight and self-knowledge more than a call to celibacy. While God could communicate in that way, I don't think that should be assumed. Perhaps someone else could comment on discerning the call to celibacy. I only know that I am called to be celibate because to be anything else would be a sin for me.

 

[mg0086]

This is just my opinion, but I think failed relationships signal a need for insight and self-knowledge more than a call to celibacy. While God could communicate in that way, I don't think that should be assumed. Perhaps someone else could comment on discerning the call to celibacy. I only know that I am called to be celibate because to be anything else would be a sin for me.

I think the way that works when you consider being in clergy or staying celibate. When you get that feeling that says, "I think I really could do that...yeah...that really seems like that kind of thing I wanna do for the rest of my life!" then I think you've found your calling.

I could never be that strong tho.....geez...when you think of it...I'm really pretty weak...

 

[N67896]

I pass a billboard on the way to work every day. It makes some claim that Edison failed 9,999 times before he got a lightbulb that worked.

Imagine what would have happened if, after the 4th or 5th attempt, Edison threw up his hands and said, "Maybe Heaven intends that I should be a (insert denomination name here; I chickened out)."

 

[KeenanParkerII]

I pass a billboard on the way to work every day. It makes some claim that Edison failed 9,999 times before he got a lightbulb that worked.

Imagine what would have happened if, after the 4th or 5th attempt, Edison threw up his hands and said, "Maybe Heaven intends that I should be a (insert denomination name here; I chickened out)."

Then we'd be forced to congregate around bonfires and BBQ's for light (which is much cooler than light bulbs)!

But hey, good point.

 

[Michie]

Hi everyone. My relationships never work out for me. I've had a lot of relationships and none of them ever worked out for me. Is this God's way of telling me that I am meant to be single?

No.

I think we have relationships that don't work out when we try to do things our way or rush things. Look for a relationship for our fulfillment.


I think if you get involved in Church activities or a Catholic singles group God will direct who He chose your way in His time.

 

[JCFantasy23]

Some relationships happen to show you things God wants you to know, to grow better for future relationships, to have support during a critical time of your life or theirs, or to learn how to be a better partner for the right one. This is how I see it anyway. I've been in many relationships as well, most of them quite different from others. I don't end up with the same type of people really. I have had wonderful experiences from all the relationships, and some bad, but I have learned from each one as well.

 

[oldfashionedbelle]

Ave Maria,

I understand how you feel, sometimes I have the same worry. I have dated men who were controlling, abusive, selfish, indifferent, etc. I have never experienced a healthy relationship. Though I have been engaged and been told many times I have no idea what it feels like to be truly loved in a romantic way. I don't feel as if I am meant to be single, I have too strong a desire to have a family. But in the past few months I have become much more independant, I secured a job with which I can completely support myself and it has lifted a huge weight off of my shoulders. I feel in control of my own life at last! I do not need a man to pay for me, but I would like to meet a like minded gentleman to fall in love with and start a family with. I am just a very shy person so I have a hard time meeting people, I have often settled for less in the past because those cruel men were the types that approached me. I am at a disadvantage because I do not have any friends outside of my family and no members of my family are close enough to my age so I do not have any one to introduce me to someone appropriate. I have visited so called Catholic dating websites but there were no men in my area. I tried Match.com for awhile but most of the men were not gentlemen. I went out with one man who called himself Catholic but he was very rude on the date and obnoxious and was already talking about having children on the first date, I was very uncomfortable and ended up leaving. So I have sort of given up on dating I do not know what to do. I pray to God in hopes that he will reveal to me the man he has intended to be my soul mate, but although I trust in His wisdom, it is hard not to be a little impatient sometimes.

 

[Meelahd]

It is God telling you to become a Nun.