I am turning 18 this sunday (23rd) and so my grandparents on my mothers side are having a little get together thing at their house on Saturday. Well my mom called me this morning to tell me that she might not be able to come because her and her boyfriend have a lot of "stuff" to do. She wouldn't tell me what that "stuff" was but if I know them right its probably just cleaning and going grocery shopping. Am I wrong to take offense from this? I just think its kind of unfair for my mother, who never calls me to talk or visits me, to miss out on my 18th birthday. It's kind of a big thing. I don't really understand because she just keeps trying to distance me from her because of her boyfriend, I can't understand how someone could care more for a person that treats them like **** then their own daughter.
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my mother...
- Thread starter Acickea926
- Start date
I think I probably understand (as much as is possible) My own mother told me years ago when I graduated, that she couldn't come because she was "busy". When I asked why--she said she had to "mop the kitchen". If there's one thing that I've learned it's that we can't help the way people act or don't act. We just can't control that. But we also should not take the blame for it either. Sometimes people are selfish and insensitive toward the very people they should cherish. And I know it's hard, but I hope you won't dwell on it. No it's not fair, but people let us down. It's the way life is. Pray for her. I will as well. And remember the One Who does love and cherish you. Enough to give His very life for you. Now there's the definition of love. I pray you will find comfort in Him knowing He will never leave you or forsake you. And that He cherishes you more than you could ever know.
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Hi Acickea926 ,
I too have struggled with feelings of rejection regarding family members .
This verse leapt out at me one day -
When my father and my mother forsake me, then the LORD will take me up. <-----> Psalm 27:10
Also there are these ...
Then one said unto him, Behold, thy mother and thy brethren stand without, desiring to speak with thee.
But he answered and said unto him that told him, Who is my mother? and who are my brethren?
And he stretched forth his hand toward his disciples, and said, Behold my mother and my brethren!
For whosoever shall do the will of my Father which is in heaven, the same is my brother, and sister, and mother. <-----> Matthew 12:47-50
And Jesus answered and said, Verily I say unto you, There is no man that hath left house, or brethren, or sisters, or father, or mother, or wife, or children, or lands, for my sake, and the gospel's,
But he shall receive an hundredfold now in this time, houses, and brethren, and sisters, and mothers, and children, and lands, with persecutions; and in the world to come eternal life. <-----> Mark 10:29+30
May you find your consolation in God's abundant grace .
wm
I too have struggled with feelings of rejection regarding family members .
This verse leapt out at me one day -
When my father and my mother forsake me, then the LORD will take me up. <-----> Psalm 27:10
Also there are these ...
Then one said unto him, Behold, thy mother and thy brethren stand without, desiring to speak with thee.
But he answered and said unto him that told him, Who is my mother? and who are my brethren?
And he stretched forth his hand toward his disciples, and said, Behold my mother and my brethren!
For whosoever shall do the will of my Father which is in heaven, the same is my brother, and sister, and mother. <-----> Matthew 12:47-50
And Jesus answered and said, Verily I say unto you, There is no man that hath left house, or brethren, or sisters, or father, or mother, or wife, or children, or lands, for my sake, and the gospel's,
But he shall receive an hundredfold now in this time, houses, and brethren, and sisters, and mothers, and children, and lands, with persecutions; and in the world to come eternal life. <-----> Mark 10:29+30
May you find your consolation in God's abundant grace .
wm
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Rafael
Only time enough for love
Although others will let you down in life, even parents who are human, we can't afford to let a root of bitterness come into our life. It leads to anger which the devil can use, so fight it off with prayer and resist thoughts of bitterness. Tell Jesus about it, and ask for His help to make you a light to your parents that overcomes darkness for Love's sake - for God's sake, because you love Him and those others that disappoint you.
Remember, every time someone does you wrong, it is an opportunity to bless them and the Lord.
Ro 12:21 Be not overcome of evil, but overcome evil with good.
1 Corinthians 13:4 Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud
5 or rude. Love does not demand its own way. Love is not irritable, and it keeps no record of when it has been wronged.
Eph 4:31 Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of malicious behavior.
Remember, every time someone does you wrong, it is an opportunity to bless them and the Lord.
Ro 12:21 Be not overcome of evil, but overcome evil with good.
1 Corinthians 13:4 Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud
5 or rude. Love does not demand its own way. Love is not irritable, and it keeps no record of when it has been wronged.
Eph 4:31 Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of malicious behavior.
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I dont know the entire situation, but on your birthday, be thankful for the people who are there...sounds like you have more people that care about that some people only wish for. Be thankful for whats there and don't let the rest bother you as much as possible 
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I am so sorry. I understand your feelings compleatly and they are justified in feeling the way that you do. Your mother is wrong. There is nothing wrong with you. You are not unloveable. You have done nothing to cause her to make this choice. Your mother is wrong. She is making a big mistake and hurting you in the process.
There is nothing you can do or say to make her change. Only she can do that. She is making a most unwise choice.
But God will not abandon you, and He will not leave you without family (biological or otherwise) that do love you and will care for you. I know this hurts, but try and focus on what you do have. I know that sounds rough... but the truth is there is no point in telling you fairy tales... you are 18 and you wouldn't believe them anyway.
There is nothing you can do or say to make her change. Only she can do that. She is making a most unwise choice.
But God will not abandon you, and He will not leave you without family (biological or otherwise) that do love you and will care for you. I know this hurts, but try and focus on what you do have. I know that sounds rough... but the truth is there is no point in telling you fairy tales... you are 18 and you wouldn't believe them anyway.
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Acickea926 said:
Are you wrong to take offense? No. But what will you gain from becoming offended and bitter? If you choose to be offended the only person you will end up harming is yourself. Have you tried explaining to her how important this is to you and how much you want her to be there?
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I know I'm about an hour early but I'm not sure what I'll be doing tomorrow. Just wanted to wish you a Happy Birthday Acickea926. So......
[pong]
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!! [/pong]
[pong]
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!! [/pong]
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forgivenmuch
christ is the answer
i know how you feel.. and theres alot of people that go thru this. sorry about your hurt. but do not let it contunue to bother you. your 18 now.. that thats wonderful.. i hope you had a wonderful birthday. just be thankul of people being there.. and talk to your mom how it bothers you.. be open to her..that would help.
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thank you! All the advice is really nice..I will be talking to her tomorrow (couldn't today because she wasn't there).
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Ave Maria
Ave Maria Gratia Plena
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Caelum said:I dont know the entire situation, but on your birthday, be thankful for the people who are there...sounds like you have more people that care about that some people only wish for. Be thankful for whats there and don't let the rest bother you as much as possible
Amen Caelum! Although I admit I would be disappointed if my Mom hadn't showed up for my 18th birthday too.
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Well l wouldn't be upset too if my mom didn't come to my birthday l would talk to her and ask why thats not right for her not to come. Just talk to her about it and tell her how you feel about this situation l hope everything works out for you bye
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