My career goal was to be an RN, I started taking pre reqs for it last year. My parents were pressuring me saying that this nursing thing is going to take too long. They thought you just go straight into nursing school. I was doing good early this year when my mom heard about this new LPN program that had just opened, i told her that I'd rather stay at the college I was at, and RN's tend to get more respect and make more money than LPN's anyway.
She got very angry wtih me, and demanded that I go and get started. She accused me of not wanting to better myself if I don't do what she said. She threatened me, cursed me out, the whole works. She can get very volent.
So I ended up going through a bunch of rings just to get a position in this latteral program. I had doubts from the beginning and my instinct told me that this program was probably crap. First they make you go through several courses before you even get to the LPN, and then they pick the ones they like or the ones who score the highest on the test even though the majority fail
I had studied my hardest for the test given the little time they gave me. And I missed it by 10 points. Initially the counselor said that I could take the test again, but she changed it midstream and said now they don't let students retake it. And her words were, "if you took it over again I doubt your score would go up anyway" She advised me to turn in the test scores and see if I will have a shot a getting into the program.
I cried when I found out that I could not retake the test. I just knew that if I scored higher it would give me a better shot. I called my mother up and was crying my tears out, just feeling like my life was coming to a dead end. My mother does not always make a situation better, she started saying things like "welll you know you weren't ready to take the test so why did you?" "I knew you wouldn't pass that test when I saw it myself. I thought how can y ou ever know this stuff" Just making the situation worse and blaming me for taking the test before I was ready. But I could not take the test any other time, my counselor told me that I either take it now or never.
I sent in my portfolio with my test scores and weeks later I contacted the counselor to see how things were going. She basically told me that looking at my test scores compared to their top 25 I might not be getting in, and that in a few weeks they'll be calling people to let them know if they will be accepted into the program.
She told me that I could take a CNA class (I am already certified in my state as one) just to brush up on my skills. I was offended. That CNA class is 5 weeks long and for 7 hours a day. I need to get my life on track and this is only setting me BACKWARDS. I told her that I could be using tha time towards something more beneficial like pursuing a career in nursing
A lot of people in this program are failing the test left and right. They even discourage new students who come into the program by reminding them that out of 200 students only 3-4 people officially pass. They don't give you any tutoring to help you build your skills to pass, they do recommend study guides that might help, but they c laim those books are of no use just look at how many fail.
When I left the counselor's office I was so angry, another male counselor who has a crush on me stopped to speak but I couldn't. I was on the verge of tears I jsut told him that they'll never see my face back here again. I was so upset and mad at myself. I sat in the car crying for about an hour just not knowing where my life will go. I wish I could have just stayed at college and taken four classes. But no, I wasted a significant portion of my life thinking that I was a step closer to being a nurse only to be set back. I am getting older and I cannot be living with my parents taking pre reqs and then waiting to get accepted into nursing school. I thought I could do it now while I am young and have the time. If I go back to college in January I won't even be able to get accepted into nursing school next year. and when I move out on my own which I am going to have to do being a nurse is just out of the question. No way I can go to nursing school 5 days a week 8 hours a day and afford to pay tent
Basically my parents are looking at me like a failure. Particularly my dad, I overhead him say one day that he knew I was never going to amount up to anything and look at just what happened. These low test scores just prove to him that I am nothing. He doesn't even speak to me by the way.
I don't know maybe being a nurse is just not my calling. I don't know what other career I could do to make ends meet. The job market out here is rough. I went looking for jobs today and got turned away without even being given an application. They all said that they are not hiring at the moment.
I have been having suicidal thoughts. I feel like if I don't get accepted than I'd rather just die. I don't want to be a secretary or work mininum wage jobs for the rest of my life to support myself. I don't want my calling in life to be a cashier or work in a factory. I guess I am not as smart as I thought I was. I can't believe I ever thought that. I keep thinking about parking myself in the garage, leave the car running and to just fall asleep forever. I really don't see things getting better for now
She got very angry wtih me, and demanded that I go and get started. She accused me of not wanting to better myself if I don't do what she said. She threatened me, cursed me out, the whole works. She can get very volent.
So I ended up going through a bunch of rings just to get a position in this latteral program. I had doubts from the beginning and my instinct told me that this program was probably crap. First they make you go through several courses before you even get to the LPN, and then they pick the ones they like or the ones who score the highest on the test even though the majority fail
I had studied my hardest for the test given the little time they gave me. And I missed it by 10 points. Initially the counselor said that I could take the test again, but she changed it midstream and said now they don't let students retake it. And her words were, "if you took it over again I doubt your score would go up anyway" She advised me to turn in the test scores and see if I will have a shot a getting into the program.
I cried when I found out that I could not retake the test. I just knew that if I scored higher it would give me a better shot. I called my mother up and was crying my tears out, just feeling like my life was coming to a dead end. My mother does not always make a situation better, she started saying things like "welll you know you weren't ready to take the test so why did you?" "I knew you wouldn't pass that test when I saw it myself. I thought how can y ou ever know this stuff" Just making the situation worse and blaming me for taking the test before I was ready. But I could not take the test any other time, my counselor told me that I either take it now or never.
I sent in my portfolio with my test scores and weeks later I contacted the counselor to see how things were going. She basically told me that looking at my test scores compared to their top 25 I might not be getting in, and that in a few weeks they'll be calling people to let them know if they will be accepted into the program.
She told me that I could take a CNA class (I am already certified in my state as one) just to brush up on my skills. I was offended. That CNA class is 5 weeks long and for 7 hours a day. I need to get my life on track and this is only setting me BACKWARDS. I told her that I could be using tha time towards something more beneficial like pursuing a career in nursing
A lot of people in this program are failing the test left and right. They even discourage new students who come into the program by reminding them that out of 200 students only 3-4 people officially pass. They don't give you any tutoring to help you build your skills to pass, they do recommend study guides that might help, but they c laim those books are of no use just look at how many fail.
When I left the counselor's office I was so angry, another male counselor who has a crush on me stopped to speak but I couldn't. I was on the verge of tears I jsut told him that they'll never see my face back here again. I was so upset and mad at myself. I sat in the car crying for about an hour just not knowing where my life will go. I wish I could have just stayed at college and taken four classes. But no, I wasted a significant portion of my life thinking that I was a step closer to being a nurse only to be set back. I am getting older and I cannot be living with my parents taking pre reqs and then waiting to get accepted into nursing school. I thought I could do it now while I am young and have the time. If I go back to college in January I won't even be able to get accepted into nursing school next year. and when I move out on my own which I am going to have to do being a nurse is just out of the question. No way I can go to nursing school 5 days a week 8 hours a day and afford to pay tent
Basically my parents are looking at me like a failure. Particularly my dad, I overhead him say one day that he knew I was never going to amount up to anything and look at just what happened. These low test scores just prove to him that I am nothing. He doesn't even speak to me by the way.
I don't know maybe being a nurse is just not my calling. I don't know what other career I could do to make ends meet. The job market out here is rough. I went looking for jobs today and got turned away without even being given an application. They all said that they are not hiring at the moment.
I have been having suicidal thoughts. I feel like if I don't get accepted than I'd rather just die. I don't want to be a secretary or work mininum wage jobs for the rest of my life to support myself. I don't want my calling in life to be a cashier or work in a factory. I guess I am not as smart as I thought I was. I can't believe I ever thought that. I keep thinking about parking myself in the garage, leave the car running and to just fall asleep forever. I really don't see things getting better for now
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