My girlfriend is Wiccan, it's hurting her, and I don't know how to help her.

[logmantm]

As you read in the title, my girlfriend is Wiccan, and it's hurting her. Before I explain the situation, let me just say that I found out about her religion through twitter a few hours ago, and she doesn't know that I know. I honestly don't care what religion you're in as long as you aren't hurting anyone because of it, and for the most part for her that is true. However, my girlfriend is experiencing severe psychological trauma because of it, I'll explain why later.
Basically what's going on is that she had to go to a psychiatrist for her problems. She now is on an anti-depressant that's supposed to help her, but it isn't. She tells me that it's because "it's weak to rely on the pill to get through it", but I'm pretty sure she doesn't want me to figure out she's Wiccan because of the general opinion between Christians of Wiccans (I read up on them from the point of view of an actual Wiccan, and I think they're fine for the most part). Through my research, I leaned about their principals on medicine. I may be wrong about this, but I think the reason that her situation upsets her, but from what I can find, she's upset because most Wiccans believe in using herbal medicine over synthesized medicine because it's sacred to them. I don't know how I can help her or if I can try to help her without her getting mad at me. Please help, this is tearing me apart inside and I don't know what to do.

 

[EzekielsWheels]

She might be suffering from oppression due to the occult and need deliverance. I pray she comes to Jesus Christ and faith in him. He can be the healing she needs.

 

[Thriftypassenger]

Praying for her to encounter Christ.

 

[☦Marius☦]

As you read in the title, my friend is Wiccan, and it's hurting her. Before I explain the situation, let me just say that I found out about her religion through twitter a few hours ago, and she doesn't know that I know. I honestly don't care what religion you're in as long as you aren't hurting anyone because of it, and for the most part for her that is true. However, my girlfriend is experiencing severe psychological trauma because of it, I'll explain why later.
Basically what's going on is that she had to go to a psychiatrist for her problems. She now is on an anti-depressant that's supposed to help her, but it isn't. She tells me that it's because "it's weak to rely on the pill to get through it", but I'm pretty sure she doesn't want me to figure out she's Wiccan because of the general opinion between Christians of Wiccans (I read up on them from the point of view of an actual Wiccan, and I think they're fine for the most part). Through my research, I leaned about their principals on medicine. I may be wrong about this, but I think the reason that her situation upsets her, but from what I can find, she's upset because most Wiccans believe in using herbal medicine over synthesized medicine because it's sacred to them. I don't know how I can help her or if I can try to help her without her getting mad at me. Please help, this is tearing me apart inside and I don't know what to do.

No offense, but having been a previous wiccan myself its going to be pretty difficult to maintain a relationship since Christianity and Wicca are about as far opposite theologically and spiritually as you can get. Unless neither of you EVER talk about religion and just ignore each other's practices- then I can't see that being a very successful relationship.

 

[archer75]

How is she your girlfriend if you just found this out?

I ask because I wonder how seriously she even takes it.

 

[Serving Zion]

As you read in the title, my friend is Wiccan, and it's hurting her. Before I explain the situation, let me just say that I found out about her religion through twitter a few hours ago, and she doesn't know that I know. I honestly don't care what religion you're in as long as you aren't hurting anyone because of it, and for the most part for her that is true. However, my girlfriend is experiencing severe psychological trauma because of it, I'll explain why later.
Basically what's going on is that she had to go to a psychiatrist for her problems. She now is on an anti-depressant that's supposed to help her, but it isn't. She tells me that it's because "it's weak to rely on the pill to get through it", but I'm pretty sure she doesn't want me to figure out she's Wiccan because of the general opinion between Christians of Wiccans (I read up on them from the point of view of an actual Wiccan, and I think they're fine for the most part). Through my research, I leaned about their principals on medicine. I may be wrong about this, but I think the reason that her situation upsets her, but from what I can find, she's upset because most Wiccans believe in using herbal medicine over synthesized medicine because it's sacred to them. I don't know how I can help her or if I can try to help her without her getting mad at me. Please help, this is tearing me apart inside and I don't know what to do.

I think that like most religions (including Christianity), it is easy to get lured in bit by bit, thinking it is a good thing you are getting into, but gradually we encounter beliefs that if we accept those beliefs, it becomes a foundation for a whole belief system that ultimately leads us to be at odds with the truth, and therefore at odds with Christ. (I included Christianity in this generalisation specifically, because it is our place to do so (1 Corinthians 5:12-13).

.. So far as the Wiccan beliefs go in her plight, it isn't as though we can say that she is specifically targeted for spiritual attacks because of her religion, because there are a great number of Christians who experience the same problems she is having, and who turn to medical professionals instead of God. So, it is that her philosophy (belief system, sense of authority in the trauma), that is her weakness. We who are Christian, who are on the path of fighting the war spiritually, we learn the techniques of prevailing through coming to see God's judgement, and knowing that turning the other cheek is ultimately giving Him the reward (eg: Romans 12:19, Matthew 5:12).

.. however, in order to offer more useful advice, I haven't understood the specific problem she is having, as to why you say she is suffering severe psychological trauma because of her religion.

 

[logmantm]

I think that like most religions (including Christianity), it is easy to get lured in bit by bit, thinking it is a good thing you are getting into, but gradually we encounter beliefs that if we accept those beliefs, it becomes a foundation for a whole belief system that ultimately leads us to be at odds with the truth, and therefore at odds with Christ. (I included Christianity in this generalisation specifically, because it is our place to do so (1 Corinthians 5:12-13).

.. So far as the Wiccan beliefs go in her plight, it isn't as though we can say that she is specifically targeted for spiritual attacks because of her religion, because there are a great number of Christians who experience the same problems she is having, and who turn to medical professionals instead of God. So, it is that her philosophy (belief system, sense of authority in the trauma), that is her weakness. We who are Christian, who are on the path of fighting the war spiritually, we learn the techniques of prevailing through coming to see God's judgement, and knowing that turning the other cheek is ultimately giving Him the reward (eg: Romans 12:19, Matthew 5:12).

.. however, in order to offer more useful advice, I haven't understood the specific problem she is having, as to why you say she is suffering severe psychological trauma because of her religion.

She is depressed, she removes herself from friend groups constantly whenever she feels like she's said the slightest thing wrong, and she generally feels very upset a lot.

 

[logmantm]

No offense, but having been a previous wiccan myself its going to be pretty difficult to maintain a relationship since Christianity and Wicca are about as far opposite theologically and spiritually as you can get. Unless neither of you EVER talk about religion and just ignore each other's practices- then I can't see that being a very successful relationship.

How is she your girlfriend if you just found this out?

I ask because I wonder how seriously she even takes it.

Yeah, we don't talk about religion a lot, as I like to focus more on a person that what they believe unless their beliefs harm others. Our conversations about religion have never gone further than me offering to pray for her, and I don't use twitter very often. As for how seriously she takes it, I don't know how I can figure that out because I don't know how to bring it up.

 

[Serving Zion]

She is depressed, she removes herself from friend groups constantly whenever she feels like she's said the slightest thing wrong, and she generally feels very upset a lot.

Would you say she is perceiving a judgmentalism, condescension, mockery from those, or would you say she loses self-esteem and shies away in order that she wouldn't get to see such things? .. is there other behaviours of concern too?

 

[logmantm]

Would you say she is perceiving a judgmentalism, condescension, mockery from those, or would you say she loses self-esteem and shies away in order that she wouldn't get to see such things? .. is there other behaviours of concern too?

The latter is true.
Yes, she feels like she's a bother to everyone else. She says she doesn't like it when people worry about her, which always makes me worry about her more.

 

[paul1149]

You might stress some basic Christian truth on the matter. God charged man with being fruitful and subduing the earth. He has hidden riches that can only be discovered by diligent seeking, and that is true of the physical realm also, as well as in His word. Inventions, including medical discoveries, are found and developed by the God-given intelligence He has invested in us. And according to the Bible, He wants us to be faithful in the little things, even in "unrighteous riches".

I wouldn't be here except for medical advances, because I was an rH baby and would have died shortly after birth. The third full transfusion finally took, and the rest is history.

If your gf were in an accident, would she decline to have a broken bone attended to? Or in agony from an intestinal problem, would she eschew pain killers?

Plenty of Christians also favor natural remedies, and I am one of them. But when you need modern medicine, you need it.

God promises to heal our diseases, in Ps 103. And the Gospel of Matthew makes clear that Jesus' healings are a fulfillment of Isaiah's promise, "by His stripes you are healed". We have every right to pray expectantly for healing in Christ.

This situation is an opportunity to talk to your gf more about the Bible and the God it describes. This is something that seems to be lacking in your relationship, so maybe this crisis is your opportunity. You might be able to do your gf far more good than you currently are contemplating.

 

[sunshineforJesus]

I will be praying for her salvation.

 

[logmantm]

You might stress some basic Christian truth on the matter. God charged man with being fruitful and subduing the earth. He has hidden riches that can only be discovered by diligent seeking, and that is true of the physical realm also, as well as in His word. Inventions, including medical discoveries, are found and developed by the God-given intelligence He has invested in us. And according to the Bible, He wants us to be faithful in the little things, even in "unrighteous riches".

I wouldn't be here except for medical advances, because I was an rH baby and would have died shortly after birth. The third full transfusion finally took, and the rest is history.

If your gf were in an accident, would she decline to have a broken bone attended to? Or in agony from an intestinal problem, would she eschew pain killers?

Plenty of Christians also favor natural remedies, and I am one of them. But when you need modern medicine, you need it.

God promises to heal our diseases, in Ps 103. And the Gospel of Matthew makes clear that Jesus' healings are a fulfillment of Isaiah's promise, "by His stripes you are healed". We have every right to pray expectantly for healing in Christ.

This situation is an opportunity to talk to your gf more about the Bible and the God it describes. This is something that seems to be lacking in your relationship, so maybe this crisis is your opportunity. You might be able to do your gf far more good than you currently are contemplating.

I have no idea what to answer that question with.
I know that this might be an opportunity, but at the same time, I don't know any way I could bring it up. I think that's what I need help with the most.

 

[Thriftypassenger]

I have no idea what to answer that question with.
I know that this might be an opportunity, but at the same time, I don't know any way I could bring it up. I think that's what I need help with the most.

Praying for God to give you the words and the timing to gently bring Christ into the situation. Praying for her to have peace and to experience His love. I would just be gentle. Praying

 

[Serving Zion]

The latter is true.
Yes, she feels like she's a bother to everyone else. She says she doesn't like it when people worry about her, which always makes me worry about her more.

What is her living situation? It seems that she is a hyper sensitive type. If a person apologises for being a bother when it isn't expected of them, it only shows that they themselves would have been bothered if they were on the receiving end. It is a heart of wrath (see Ephesians 2:1-3), which is the nature of the world: "you shouldn't have done that so you need to be punished". I have seen that nature within Christian families, btw, so as to reduce the blame of the stereotype (although religion does have some part of individual cultures). This is why I am asking what her living situation is - does she live with her folks, where the power balance gives them an unnatural advantage to exaggerate her fear of wrath?

 

[logmantm]

What is her living situation? It seems that she is a hyper sensitive type. If a person apologises for being a bother when it isn't expected of them, it only shows that they themselves would have been bothered if they were on the receiving end. It is a heart of wrath (see Ephesians 2:1-3), which is the nature of the world: "you shouldn't have done that so you need to be punished". I have seen that nature within Christian families, btw, so as to reduce the blame of the stereotype (although religion does have some part of individual cultures). This is why I am asking what her living situation is - does she live with her folks, where the power balance gives them an unnatural advantage to exaggerate her fear of wrath?

She does live with her parents.

 

[Sketcher]

Sounds like her stance on medicine is exacerbating the problems that got her in the psychiatrist's office in the first place. Not that a rejection of modern medicine is good, but those problems are very likely much worse, whatever they are. Has she been to a psychologist as well?

And yes, her being an unbeliever and in a religion that dabbles with witchcraft are spiritual problems that may be exacerbating the situation. Show her a better way than she knows - follow Jesus yourself, so you will have light to give her.

How long have you been together, anyway?

 

[logmantm]

Sounds like her stance on medicine is exacerbating the problems that got her in the psychiatrist's office in the first place. Not that a rejection of modern medicine is good, but those problems are very likely much worse, whatever they are. Has she been to a psychologist as well?

And yes, her being an unbeliever and in a religion that dabbles with witchcraft are spiritual problems that may be exacerbating the situation. Show her a better way than she knows - follow Jesus yourself, so you will have light to give her.

How long have you been together, anyway?

I don't think she's been to a psychologist.
We've been together for about a couple months.

 

[FireDragon76]

She probably needs therapy and someone to talk to. Psychiatric medicine often does little more than a placebo effect for depression. People with depression need tools to help them cope cognitively with the negative thinking that is involved in depression, as well as developing a sense of self-acceptance.

Malnutrition can also cause depression. Vitamin D deficiency is extremely common and since vitamin D is involved in most organ systems in the body, it's hard to feel good when you have a deficiency. I speak from personal experience here.

 

[Sketcher]

I don't think she's been to a psychologist.
We've been together for about a couple months.

A psychologist may be more helpful if she refuses to rely on meds. She needs to be open to what the psychologist would suggest, of course.

It sounds like you'll be learning a lot about each other. Don't get me wrong, I do not endorse relationships with unbelievers at all. You two may grow apart, and that wouldn't be a bad thing, though it may be a painful thing. I'm just saying to exploit this situation to leave her a good testimony and help her if you can, but don't hold on tight.