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[MOVED] Struggling with transgenderism

Discussion in 'Struggles with Sexuality' started by Hypen, Oct 23, 2020.

  1. Hypen

    Hypen New Member

    4
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    I have a lot to say, but I will keep this brief.

    I am a former transgender who is struggling. I don't want to be. I thought that phase was finally behind me. I decided this year that it is my moral obligation to someday become a family man, and to keep my children safe from the indoctrination that did this to me. But lately, I haven't been so well. Maybe it's reality setting in. The harm done to my body and mind are catching up, and I'm convinced I'll never have a normal life no matter how hard I try.

    Another big challenge is that the world is full of people who wish to normalize mental illnesses like transgenderism, and they never respect my boundaries. They unapologetically remind me of the easy route. I blocked it out for a long time, but lately it has been nagging at me. I could selfishly go back on hormones, but I resist. This must be how former drug addicts feel when surrounded by users.

    A healthy life is looking like a pipe dream. I'm the type to stop wanting something if I find it unrealistic. So I'm finding it a challenge to even want a healthy life anymore, let alone try for it.

    I don't have a support network, and even if I did, I don't know what anyone could do to help. Praying hasn't helped. What should I be doing?
     
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  2. BobRyan

    BobRyan Junior Member

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    Do you have a church family?
     
  3. JackRT

    JackRT Well-Known Member Supporter

    +15,987
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    What you are experiencing is known as "cognitive dissonance". This is the mental and spiritual tension that results when your beliefs are in contradiction with reality. One way or another reality always wins.
     
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  4. JackRT

    JackRT Well-Known Member Supporter

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    Dr. M. Scott Peck --- One should accept reality no matter the consequences.
     
  5. kingsdaughter85

    kingsdaughter85 Well-Known Member CF Ambassadors

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    Welcome brother. I will pray for you❤️
     
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  6. Kenny'sID

    Kenny'sID Well-Known Member Supporter

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    Then you are saying the OP should give in?
     
  7. GDL

    GDL Well-Known Member

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    Your identity says "other religion." What is your "religion"?
     
  8. JackRT

    JackRT Well-Known Member Supporter

    +15,987
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    All I am suggesting is that he needs to find a way to confront the reality of what he is, Denying that is what is tearing him apart.
     
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  9. Kenny'sID

    Kenny'sID Well-Known Member Supporter

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    A drug addict trying to get off drugs gets torn apart as well, but suggesting they just give in would be horrible advice.

    You really aren't helping this person who happens to be on a tough struggle as it is.

    Wow, Jack.
     
  10. Anthony2019

    Anthony2019 Pax et bonum! CF Ambassadors Supporter

    +7,698
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    I have a very close friend who is transgender.
    I am very aware of the many challenges she faces and experiences on a day to day basis.
    I don't have any easy answers to give her, but she knows I am her friend and I will always be there for her and will listen to her.
    Her journey through life has by no means been an easy one and yet I have strong admiration for her courage. I have witnessed first hand much of the verbal abuse she has had to tolerate from cruel and cowardly people on a daily basis and have been humbled by her kindness and forbearance, often at tremendous cost to her own personal mental health and wellbeing. And yet she still continues to live her life selflessly, looking after her frail mother and taking care of her needs every day.
    I am not qualified to tackle the subject of transgenderism from a theological or ethical standpoint. All I will say is that I am very honoured and privileged to be a friend of one of the kindest souls I know.
     
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  11. NerdGirl

    NerdGirl The untamed daughter

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    I'm so sorry for the struggle you're going through.

    I have friends who are transgender. I know the torment and despair that can plague someone who doesn't feel at home in their own body and mind. Sadly, our current culture doesn't offer a lot in the way of support for those who want to work through these issues rather than give into them.

    If you don't currently have a therapist or counselor of some kind, I would encourage you to seek one out. Someone who is trained specifically in dealing with gender and identity issues, and someone who is not blatantly resistant to those who want to detransition or otherwise reclaim their biological gender.

    I can completely understand how challenging and tiring the fight must be for you. And how a healthy, happy life must seem so distant and out of reach. But I promise you, it isn't.

    No matter what you've been through, or done to your body, you are still God's beloved child. There is no mistake, no choice, no experience, no regret, that is bigger than His grace and mercy. He still loves you. He's still got a purpose for you.

    You mentioned that you've prayed, but are you keeping deep in His word as well? That's where we find the truth about Him, and ourselves. It's where we get the ammunition to fight against all the lies that the world, Satan, and even we, tell ourselves. I'd encourage you to start reading it regularly, and don't stop.
     
  12. JackRT

    JackRT Well-Known Member Supporter

    +15,987
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    I agree completely but this is not an addiction problem.
     
  13. Blade

    Blade Veteran Supporter

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    Only here to share what I know and will be bold about it. Not here to speak negativity about any one. I do not truly know what you believe. I have seen to many that do not go on living with this or the like as in homosexuality. Seen the power of God through what Christ has done. Where they can't explain it.. those desires? Gone.. I mean gone.

    Yeshua/Jesus Christ is real. Not going to make this long. I do not do this lightly nor offten.... for its not me its Him. There are many times in this life we need a little help to boost our faith. He has heard you... I as others will be praying for you. Not what i want but what you said here. You will walk up soon and wonder.. where did all those desires go. See HE IS ALIVE AND REAL! Yeshua/Jesus Christ king of kings lord of lords. Again seem to many wonders and would have to lie to say different.

    Have faith in Him. If I said something to offend please forgive me. Your not alone.. there is no one in all creation that loves you more then He. Praise GOD glory to JESUS!
     
  14. Kenny'sID

    Kenny'sID Well-Known Member Supporter

    +6,404
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    Of course it is, the OP even likens it to that. It's something he's so used to doing it is tough to stop.

    Anyway, sorry to be so rough on you but what you said...well, nevermind.
     
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  15. JackRT

    JackRT Well-Known Member Supporter

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    I am quite used to that and I completely stand by what I have said. Reality must be faced even though the cost be dear.
     
  16. Kenny'sID

    Kenny'sID Well-Known Member Supporter

    +6,404
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    What do you mean reality must be faced....just give in?

    I mean it seems to me he has faced the reality already, so I dont get what your saying he should do.
     
  17. JackRT

    JackRT Well-Known Member Supporter

    +15,987
    Canada
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    The OP seems to indicate that he is still not accepting reality.

    God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
    The courage to change the things I can,
    And the wisdom to know the difference.
     
  18. Kenny'sID

    Kenny'sID Well-Known Member Supporter

    +6,404
    Christian
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    Then you are saying he should give in. Aside from going on the record as saying that is very bad advice, I'll try to leave it at that.
     
  19. JackRT

    JackRT Well-Known Member Supporter

    +15,987
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    I'll leave it there as well.
     
  20. Hazelelponi

    Hazelelponi Well-Known Member Supporter

    +5,655
    United States
    Baptist
    Married
    Hello and welcome. I pray you'll find a home with the faithful, and ease in your struggles through Christ.

    Yours is not an easy journey most especially how some have politicized your struggle, but many people who come to Christ come from backgrounds not easy to overcome and they find peace in Christ - even in the struggle.

    I agree with the posters who mentioned finding a church family that you can not only be honest with but who can support you when trying to overcome this.

    Also, I agree with the one who suggested a counselor who is knowledgeable in and supportive with those who want to detransition... (more difficult to find in some states and if that's the case in your state, perhaps a move in the future if possible so you can get the help you need)

    Other than that, look for books written by former transgender individuals who found salvation and freedom in Christ.. There is A Transgender's Faith by Walt Heyer that shares one man's journey, he also has a website as well as a blog you can check out also.
     
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