This question is for women really. But in any case I'll take advice from anyone who can give it to me. However, as a millitary man I have to constantly leave everything and everyone I know. This doesn't bother me. I volenteered for it. I love what I do. But it is hard to meet people. I have often wondered, what does my situation look like to people who aren't in my shoes. What do woman really think about good christian men who are military. I have always heard "Woman love a guy in uniform." I don't believe it for some reason. Am I wrong?
paul123, Hard for me to answer what all women think because it depends on the woman.
I can answer from my experience in and out of the military (Army - active duty and Air Force Reserve - 11 years total). Before joining I kind of thought army guys were dorks (
it surprised a lot of people I joined because I was a little prissy). Then I realized why, after I got out of active duty and went to college my style was exactly the same as I went in. Some dorm mates pointed it out and I had to revamp my wardrobe and hair. It's not an important thing, but something I noticed because your wearing the uniform all the time.
There are plenty of women that love the guy in the uniform. I knew plenty of good christian men also, but I didn't connect with any of them (
could have been style/hipness?). That's one thing I found in college, but college is more my niche.
The response on hooligans, yes I definitely saw it when I lived overseas far away from bases, this was the reputation that many felt. Those of academia circles especially speak of them as being closed minded and the disrespect done to locals outside military bases.
I myself like someone that is SF, we knew each other when we were active and he got saved not long after me. His style was a bit out of sorts and maybe still now. but as we grew as Christians, I've fallen for him more and more over the years (
13 to be exact). He himself made the same decision as I did, not to marry while in the military. I just feel it's too difficult with the lifestyle, and I surely don't want to marry the Army. He's thinking about marriage now and will retire maybe in another couple years.
So it all depends on the person, and people change, as you see I've changed. Because when we grow in Christ, the outer appearence of things seem less and less important.
oh btw, many women I've talked to also see a BIG difference between the enlisted men's maturity and officers. One woman told me after a divorce she decided to find a pilot and has been happy since, she's in her 50's now.
Thanks for serving our country and serving our Lord as an Ambassador for Christ. Being salt in the military can be very tough, especially if your around some of the guys 24/7. Christ bless and encourage you.
As another guy in the military, I'm gonna lay it down for you bra. A lot of people look at military guys as hooligans, misfits, and whatever else comes to your mind that fits that description. It may not be you but people are pretty stereotypical when it comes to judging people, so if one military guy acts stupid, all military guys must be that way. At least that's what I was told by many women. I'm just happy I found the "one" and am very happy I don't have to go through the whole "process" again. It's just a matter of misjudgement that a lot of good military guys get the shaft end of relationship opportunity. Also the fact that we have to leave a lot doesn't help. Believe me I almost lost my wife when I was in Afghanistan for a year. You just have to keep looking and find someone that is strong willed and can handle military life. Preferably someone with military family background. It also helps if your in a military branch that doesn't deploy as much. Hope this somewhat helps you out and good luck finding someone!!
god1983, yes I think I can agree a little with the hooligans cocept, from talking with other college grads when I lived overseas. I hear from soldiers that are forced to go to countries they don't want and disrespect the culture in the process.
a good man is a good man no matter what he does for a living. I think highly of men and women in uniform. I think if i was with a guy in the military, I would worry a lot about him, but i would be proud of him.
Mina, yes I agree.
depends on the woman and depends on the guy. there's no solid answer for something like this. Yeah there are women who are attracted to military guys and those are special women who wouldn't think twice about getting involved with a military man. Personally i don't think i'd be up to the challenge of being a soldiers wife or girlfriend - i just know i'd worry too much for his safety.
little_tigress, in agreement here too.
I think that what really matters is the "good christian men" part...
Yes, it will take a special woman to handle the fact that you will be away from home a lot or that you and your family will have to move a lot, or that she will worry if you are called to serve overseas somewhere...but the bottom line is that if she loves you then she'll take the fact that you are in the military as part of the whole package.
I know that I would worry if I was married to a military man and he was called to serve overseas...but if he was the man that I fell in love with and that the Lord had chosen for me then I would accept it as part of being married to him...and as far as the moving goes, I for one would see it as an adventure. I love to travel and see different parts of the U.S. and the world...I'm not saying it wouldn't be difficult but if my husband was a strong christian man who loved me and I knew that he was the man that the Lord had chosen for me...then I'd follow him any where...(oh, and the uniform doesn't hurt either
)
And by the way, I admire people like you who are willing to put their lives on the line for our country so
THANK YOU!!!!
dluvs2trvl, well spoken.
