On nice guys:
Unless deliberately breaking the pattern, people often replicate their childhood environments. Many find comfort in the familiar. If a woman's father treated her mother badly, that becomes her impression of manliness. Although she may say she doesn't like it (and mean it!), to her the abuse is comfortable. Or maybe she feels unworthy of better treatment. Either way, she doesn't know what to make of a truly nice guy. She finds the concept alien and confusing.
Let's say a man from a caring family falls for a beautiful woman whose father beat her mother. The woman may push the caring man away because, according to her, he isn't masculine enough unless he exhibits similar tendencies. After all, if he was a real man he wouldn't care so much.
Of course, he may not really "care so much" as he was simply raised that way. It's just the bare-bones status quo for him. He doesn't expect to woo her with his common decency, but he may expect her to be cordial. After all, that's what he's used to, and something he's looking for in a partner.
You won't find many men who, when confronted with the idea that they're "too nice", ever thought being a wimp or lacking a spine was virtuous. Not unless they're a little slow on the uptake. Most boys are raised with the idea that strength of character and bravery are good things, and make it part of their identity as men.
