Marrying young

[tigercub]

I got married for 20 dollars. Being poor doesn't keep you from getting married here. However, I have lived with a girl before I got married when I was an atheist. Though it was do to a lot of pressure from this person and a lot of personal insecurity on my part.

Obviously it's different over there.

I don't think marriage should be limited to those who are able to have a formal ceremony. Some are not, whether for financial reasons or something else, like location.

 

[Leanna]

I highly doubt that most people who cohabitate (while legally unmarried) have the same level of committment and devotion that legally married couples have. My point is that most people who cohabitate do it for the very reason that they lack true committment for a standard marriage. I don't believe these shack-up marriages are legitimate. I believe they are half-hearted and uncommitted.

Exactly.... if you're really committed, you get married legally. Its not that hard.

 

[crusadernoel]

Is there any couples in here that either are very young and married or married young? What kind of problems has this made, or did it make while you were young?

I'm sorry if I'm not allowed to post here, but I've always been very curious about this.

I married my wife when we were both 17.
You are a very different person at 21 to the person you were at 17.
Accordingly we have drifted apart over the years and now hate each other.
However, because divorce is a sin we stay together and tolerate one another.
She has her affairs, I concern myself with the care of our dog Geoffrey. It's not great but it's our life.

 

[RedTulipMom]

I got married at 18 and was divorced by the time i was 24. We THOUGHT we knew everything. We THOUGHT we were so old and mature. We hadnt a clue. It was a huge mistake. I was "madly in love" and thought thats all that mattered...lots of other things mattered..like maturity! i wouldnt advise getting married so young. Thankfully i found another husband and got married at 27 and this time its great..our 10 yr wedding anniversary is this sept.

 

[Lead]

Is there any couples in here that either are very young and married or married young? What kind of problems has this made, or did it make while you were young?

I'm sorry if I'm not allowed to post here, but I've always been very curious about this.

Ok, I am not married, however, I do have some fresh insights on the enormous changes that occur between the ages of about 16-20. There are some serious maturity changes throughout those years so right off the bat my advice would be to wait at least a few years. But here are a few other things to consider.

You are 17, you are not even out of high school yet, most likely. Have you ever held a steady job? Have you ever dealt with your own finances? Have you ever bought all your own meals or cooked for yourself and paid all the bills? Do you make, or can you make enough to support you and your wife and a kid or two? What do your parents think of the whole thing? What does your pastor think of the whole thing? What does godly counsel think for the most part?

You don't need to answer these questions on here, I just am throughing them out there. I don't even know if you have someone in mind or not.

However, as a side note, and please don't take offense at this, you have a UN flag as your flag. That basically tells me that you don't have a clue about the world (unless you are from UN controlled, there is an oxymoron, part of the world). I say that in love. Before you start thinking about getting married, you need to start thinking about prepairing for marriage.

I will say this to. When I was 17 or right when I turned 18 I began to think about getting married, and I realized that I had a lot to get done before I should even consider getting married.

 

[SarcasmDispenser]

However, as a side note, and please don't take offense at this, you have a UN flag as your flag. That basically tells me that you don't have a clue about the world (unless you are from UN controlled, there is an oxymoron, part of the world). I say that in love. Before you start thinking about getting married, you need to start thinking about prepairing for marriage.

You don't say that in love, don't even kid yourself. How am I supposed to not take offense to you claiming I don't have a clue about the world?

I'm from the US, but at times like these where cowboy diplomacy rules (however, Bush has made a few less-stupid foreign policy decisions recently) I fly the UN flag to represnt my distaste with the current administration.

 

[sjdennis]

I don't see how someone's political opinion / patriotic feelings are supposed to affect their preparedness for marriage.

 

[tigercub]

Ok, I am not married, however, I do have some fresh insights on the enormous changes that occur between the ages of about 16-20. There are some serious maturity changes throughout those years so right off the bat my advice would be to wait at least a few years. But here are a few other things to consider.

You are 17, you are not even out of high school yet, most likely. Have you ever held a steady job? Have you ever dealt with your own finances? Have you ever bought all your own meals or cooked for yourself and paid all the bills? Do you make, or can you make enough to support you and your wife and a kid or two? What do your parents think of the whole thing? What does your pastor think of the whole thing? What does godly counsel think for the most part?

You don't need to answer these questions on here, I just am throughing them out there. I don't even know if you have someone in mind or not.

However, as a side note, and please don't take offense at this, you have a UN flag as your flag. That basically tells me that you don't have a clue about the world (unless you are from UN controlled, there is an oxymoron, part of the world). I say that in love. Before you start thinking about getting married, you need to start thinking about prepairing for marriage.

I will say this to. When I was 17 or right when I turned 18 I began to think about getting married, and I realized that I had a lot to get done before I should even consider getting married.

If you are going to question another person's maturity, do a spell check on your post first (not being nasty )

 

[Lead]

If you are going to question another person's maturity, do a spell check on your post first (not being nasty )

Woops, That is prity bed.

About the UN thing. Yes I do say it in love. I think that it is very sad that a fellow Christian and American would prefer the UN to the elected U.S. gov. If you want to debate the UN start another thread and PM me about it.

I wasn't trying to say that politics was a determining factor about being ready for marriage. However, if you would rather have the UN than the elected government then that raises questions about your loyalty and honesty.

You have most likely pledged allegiance to the Flag and to the Republic of the United States. Yet you are willing to throw out that Republic, that you pledged allegiance to, on a whim because you didn't get what you wanted on Election Day. That is immature, disloyal and dishonest. If you can't keep a simple pledge because you didn't get wanted, how will you be able to keep a major pledge in marriage?

My recommendation, read less Time magazine (couldn’t resist).

 

[SarcasmDispenser]

That is immature, disloyal and dishonest.

You called me immature, yet you are the one who began by making character attacks because I have a UN flag.

You have most likely pledged allegiance to the Flag and to the Republic of the United States. Yet you are willing to throw out that Republic, that you pledged allegiance to, on a whim because you didn't get what you wanted on Election Day. That is immature, disloyal and dishonest. If you can't keep a simple pledge because you didn't get wanted, how will you be able to keep a major pledge in marriage?

My recommendation, read less Time magazine (couldn’t resist).

You're right, every day I do pledge allegiance to the flag. That is exactly why I can not support the current administration whole-heartedly, where cowboy diplomacy and neo-conservatism (which isn't really conservatism) reign.

It has nothing to do with getting what I wanted (you see things as GETTING from the Republic where I see it as GIVING to the Republic), I would safely bet I am more involved in the political spectrum than you are, so we can go toe-to-toe for a debate if you would like.

But please, leave the flaming out of my thread, have some respect, I'd rather not get the mods involved.

I don't see how someone's political opinion / patriotic feelings are supposed to affect their preparedness for marriage.

They don't, some people just have it out for others that view things differently than they do, so they present subtle character attacks. It's sad to see that type of immaturity continues on into adulthood.

 

[SarcasmDispenser]

Double.

 

[Lead]

Ok let's do it. I will edit this post with a link to debate.

I went back and read my post and you are right. It was a character attack and I apologize for that.

http://www.christianforums.com/t3176207-un-debate.html#post25379955

 

[sjdennis]

Woops, That is prity bed.

About the UN thing. Yes I do say it in love. I think that it is very sad that a fellow Christian and American would prefer the UN to the elected U.S. gov. If you want to debate the UN start another thread and PM me about it.

I wasn't trying to say that politics was a determining factor about being ready for marriage. However, if you would rather have the UN than the elected government then that raises questions about your loyalty and honesty.

You have most likely pledged allegiance to the Flag and to the Republic of the United States. Yet you are willing to throw out that Republic, that you pledged allegiance to, on a whim because you didn't get what you wanted on Election Day. That is immature, disloyal and dishonest. If you can't keep a simple pledge because you didn't get wanted, how will you be able to keep a major pledge in marriage?

My recommendation, read less Time magazine (couldn’t resist).

Americans. Everything comes back to politics. Everyone must have "pledged allegiance to the Flag and to the Republic of the United States". Everyone must support the elected US government.

Every action movie is America saving the world from <insert terrible disaster here> - The Core, Independance Day, Men In Black, Deep Impact etc. The US President is always portrayed as the most important person in the world. I can't wait till a major blockbuster is made where China saves the world for a change. The only bright light in this line at the moment is Doctor Who, when the US President wanted to take over an alien situation and the Prime Minister of the UK told him that "he is not my boss and he certainly isn't turning this into a war". Good - we need more of this in the mainstream media. Probably some censor has decided it won't screen in the US though in case it offends someone.

What is wrong with someone having a wider loyalty than just to the United States? I can't see anything wrong with that. It is probably commendable at the moment, considering the current international warmongering that the US administration could be considered to be doing. If someone disagrees with what the US government is doing, who cares whether they live in the country or not, they are entitled to state their opinion and state that their allegience lies elsewhere as well.

If you want to do something politically, you will do much better protesting the wrongs and trying to change them than being another sheep bleating "four legs good, two legs better" (Animal Farm) and blindly following whoever is in the current government.

I know full well that putting a post like this in a forum so dominated by Americans is bound to cause a stir, but it is my opinion and I am just as entitled to it as you are to your own.

 

[seebs]

FWIW, I do not believe I have ever validly pledged allegiance to the flag. I know I got in a lot of trouble for refusing once I was old enough to understand the words.

FWIW, the pledge is idolatry, pure and simple. It is nothing else. It is not better, it is not different. It is idolatry.

If you took out the flag, and pledged to the country, it would still be incompatible with the unambiguous commands of my Lord and Savior, so I still couldn't swear.

If you took out the swearing/pledging language, and just had it be a claim of allegiance... It would still run afoul of my allegiance to Christ.

However, that's not the bad part.

The bad part is all the kids being encouraged to say words they cannot understand and thus cannot genuinely mean. These words are forsworn by their very nature; they are vacuuous oaths. And, thanks to Mr. McCarthy, every one of these vacuuous oaths has the phrase "Under God" in it. Which is to say, it is formal blasphemy.

Every school day in America, millions blaspheme under the watchful eyes of the state. Those who refuse are chastised and ostracised, and told they are wrong to make such a big deal about saying a few words.

Every day, millions are taught that oaths are meaningless and empty, that you should just say whatever it is and get on with life.

Amazingly, when they grow up to commit perjury, people act as though this is somehow other than what we taught them.

The whole thing is disgusting on that ground alone; throw in the idolatry and blasphemy, and you have one of the greatest organized evils I have ever seen in my life. It's not that it does more damage to our society than, say, our insanely high divorce rate. It's that the divorce rate, like every other form of broken promise, is the whirlwind we reap from the empty words we have sown.

 

[Lead]

Mike Newdow is that you? Oops wrong forum. But your arguments are similar in some ways. By the way the pledge has a lot of hystorical meaning woven through it. What it is saying is that this nation is under God. Therefore, God comes first, country second.

Sjdennis: If you don't like our movies, go make Some Ausie movies. Oh I forgot, we have all of your actors over here. Suggested movie for you - Day After Tomorrow. In that one the president is portayed as an idiot and America causes all sorts of problems. I think you would like it. By the way, in Core, the US created the problem, and it was a multi-ethnic team that saved the world.

I do not blindly follow the elected government. I agree with my elected leaders on some issues and disagree on others. However, when Bill Clinton was president I didn't start flying the flag of Israel. I stayed committed to my country knowing that our system of government works. See above post. Yes there is a lot wrong with our country but there is a lot right with it also. Same with yours by the way.

Anyway, I did create a new thread to discuss the UN but I see that this one has been threadjacked. SJ even you should be able to comment on the UN even though the US is the primary contributor of funds. I am kinda joking with you in case you didn't get it.

 

[Leanna]

I thought this was about marrying young, not politics. Am I on the wrong thread? okay bye.

 

[sjdennis]

seebs, that is one of the best posts I have read for a long time. Very true, and I really didn't realise how blasphemous the US school system was, although I had suspected it a little. What I can't stand is the idea of swearing on the Bible in court. The bible clearly states within it not to swear by anything!

Leanna, you're right, we should probably get back on track. On the other hand, the original topic has been discussed to death for over 100 posts, so it doesn't matter too much if we start discussing something else now.

Lead, I'm a New Zealander, NOT an Australian. You Canadians don't know anything about geography. I do much prefer Aussie and NZ movies to American, the humour is much better, and I do watch them when I can. The film industry here is just a bit smaller, but has the odd triumph (eg The Lord of the Rings). Completely off topic though!

 

[tigercub]

Sjdennis: If you don't like our movies, go make Some Ausie movies. Oh I forgot, we have all of your actors over here. Suggested movie for you - Day After Tomorrow. In that one the president is portayed as an idiot and America causes all sorts of problems.

I must interrupt here.

Here is Australia we believe in quality over quantity when it comes to movies
If you are after some titles of good Australian movies please PM me. Other than that, quit bagging my country

 

[seebs]

Mike Newdow is that you? Oops wrong forum. But your arguments are similar in some ways. By the way the pledge has a lot of hystorical meaning woven through it. What it is saying is that this nation is under God. Therefore, God comes first, country second.

Simply incorrect. The "under God" thing is not part of the history of the pledge; it was tacked on very recently. It does not have that meaning.

Nonetheless, even if it were to mean that, it'd still be idolatry, and it'd still be blasphemy to encourage people to say it who don't genuinely mean it.

 

[InTheFlame]

Lead, I'm a New Zealander, NOT an Australian.

... but if he becomes famous for anything, he'll become an honourary Aussie by default.