Lusting again...............

[TriptychR]

You, are an awesome man and a vision of maturity.
Do you have accountability?

Thank you, but I don't deserve any praise.

And yes, I do have an accountability partner; a friend who never made masturbation a habit for himself in the first place.

 

[Mϋzikdϋde]

Thank you, but I don't deserve any praise.

And yes, I do have an accountability partner; a friend who never made masturbation a habit for himself in the first place.

God get's the praise...but He has still made you awesome. Nothing wrong with that my Brother.

 

[FireRock]

For real,TriptychR, that's awesome!

Mϋzikdϋde, what you've said in your posts has been so great and encouraging. Thank you so much for all your input!

 

[Mϋzikdϋde]

It's love...and God. He showed me the truth.

 

[Vilnius]

It so great to be able to communicate with a group of people who have their heads on straight regarding the issues on this thread. I think you all Rock!

I am very lucky to have a wife who wants to actively hold me accountable. Most, if not all, of the books dealing with sexual sin advocate accountabilty, but they suggest you use other men. I was very happy to see a woman on this site who said it worked better in her case to be the main one holding her husband accountable--obviously it is not the best for all couples. My wife and I have come up with an accountability plan, taken from suggestions from several books, that we would be happy to share if you are interested.

 

[oneiric]

I figured we're all sinners anyway no matter what we try to do to stop it,

Not true. Jesus Christ said go and sin no more. He wasn't kidding. Don't use that as a cop out because that is exactly what you are doing. Christians are capable of so much more, not sinning included.

 

[Sign Of The Fish Burger]

It's love...and God. He showed me the truth.

You rock brother

 

[redemption song]

GIVE IN GIVE IN GIVE IN GIVE IN!!!!

but honestly, a lot of this is really unhealthy when you consider that you forever live in a state of guilt. doesn't anyone else see something wrong with that? i don't mean to go out and live some sort of perceived heathen life style. just stop feeling guilty everytime "feelings" arise. it's natural. what's not natural is the urge to surpress your feelings in such a way that makes them certain to return stronger time and time again.

 

[Vilnius]

GIVE IN GIVE IN GIVE IN GIVE IN!!!!

but honestly, a lot of this is really unhealthy when you consider that you forever live in a state of guilt. doesn't anyone else see something wrong with that? i don't mean to go out and live some sort of perceived heathen life style. just stop feeling guilty everytime "feelings" arise. it's natural. what's not natural is the urge to surpress your feelings in such a way that makes them certain to return stronger time and time again.

One should not feel guilty about having feelings of arousal upon seeing an attractive woman--it is normal. The issue is: What does a guy do in response to that arousal? Does he flee from the temptation to lust or does he indulge it?

A husband and wife team from the Fellowship of Christian Athletes put it this way when discussing what to do when aroused:

" As we see it there is a continuum of acts that might begin on the most aggressive end of the spectrum with a sexual assault of some kind. Moving down the spectrum would include fantasizing about the female who aroused you, or women in general, leading to masturbation. Further down the continuum would be to transfer the arousal to your relationship with your wife. All of these entail dwelling on the stimulating image, allowing the arousal to be a focus in your mind. That is where the lusting process begins. A significant change is when you come to the point where you acknowledge, 'Wow, didn't God do well when he designed women' then look away. That may include changing channels or walking away."

The idea is not to deny our God-given sexuality, but to bring it under God's control. And remember, sins are not a list of petty irritations drawn up for the sake of a jealous God. They are, rather,a description of impediments to spiritual growth.

 

[Peculiarone]

What if you think on having sex with your boyf everynight.?

 

[FireRock]

Um, way too much first of all, and sex is to be saved for marriage.

Aren't there amusing, entertaining, and better things to do than just have sex everynight? That would get old, I would think... maybe I'm just naive...

 

[Sketcher]

I am very lucky to have a wife who wants to actively hold me accountable. Most, if not all, of the books dealing with sexual sin advocate accountabilty, but they suggest you use other men. I was very happy to see a woman on this site who said it worked better in her case to be the main one holding her husband accountable--obviously it is not the best for all couples. My wife and I have come up with an accountability plan, taken from suggestions from several books, that we would be happy to share if you are interested.

That IS unusual. From what I've read, it's too much for a lot of women to take. I can see how that would be very convenient for you. Hope it continues to work out! Do you also have deep friendships with other men? Because they are good for far more than accountability.

 

[Living4Him03]

Um, way too much first of all, and sex is to be saved for marriage.

Aren't there amusing, entertaining, and better things to do than just have sex everynight? That would get old, I would think... maybe I'm just naive...

I wanna have sex with my husband every night when I get married...or at least as often as possible, but maybe I'm just naive

 

[FireRock]

Don't get me wrong, if I ever get married me and my husband are going to have sex until we've perfected it.

I guess I'm just saying in the context of a bf+gf relationship it seems kind of pointless or something, 'cause what's left for marriage then? Bills?

 

[Vilnius]

That IS unusual. From what I've read, it's too much for a lot of women to take. I can see how that would be very convenient for you. Hope it continues to work out! Do you also have deep friendships with other men? Because they are good for far more than accountability.

I would like to have male accountability partners, but that is not a concept my church is familiar with. My wife and I are in charge of starting a purity ministry at our church, so hopefully that will change.

What I read also suggests most wives can't deal with being their husband's accountability partner. Even so, I feel it is important for wives and mothers to be fully informed on the nature of male lust so they can at least monitor what is going on with their husbands and sons. They need to be aware of danger signs and aware of what should be done as far as keeping the home free of lustful images, accountabilty, modesty, etc. Even the author of "Every Man's Battle", who cautions against using one's wife as an accountabilty "partner", states that his wife still watches him for slip ups. Most importantly regarding accountability, women need to know that their husband's or boyfriend's or son's lustful actions are unacceptable to God and they should require them to cut this sin out of their lives for everyone's sake.

 

[Atrus]

I have a lot of thoughts on this subject of touching yourself. But first, I wish to give an example of what happened to me.

When I was 13 years old I had NEVER even heard of touching yourself, in fact, I hardly knew what sex was. Then one day I was in the shower....and....yeah....whamo, I did it. I was SOOOO confused. I didn't really feel guilty or convicted or anything. I sat in the bathroom for possibly two hours, confused, scared, unsure, etc...Some other day, I became even more curious, so I researched information. And found out about the emphamous "sex".....I started to realize why I was aroused when I saw beautiful women....Eventually, I masturbated to women.....I began to hate myself....I almost committed suicide because I hated my sin....Gladly the Lord began to get a hold of my life...So, I have fought for some time now. I am still struggling today.
I read some posts by some Herev guy, in the men's section. He is a pastor who doesn't believe touching yourself is wrong?!....He says if you abstract lust and selfish desires from the act. There is then nothing wrong with it!!???...
I really am not sure I agree. But he pointed out that touching yourself is NEVER discussed in scripture and cannot be proved as wrong.......Anyway, I am in the stage of my life where, I was ready to go to the doctor for surgery. I am not kidding.....I will do whatever it takes to end this sin....
Someone please HELP me...?......!....

 

[Living4Him03]

There are many things that are sin that the bible doesn't explicity clearly black and white point out for you. There are many things that God's Word does point out as sin, but there are also other areas that aren't as black and white. However, just because something isn't specifically mentioned as sin in the Bible doesn't necessarily mean it's not. Or, something that isn't specifically mentioned by name in the bible, like masturbation, may involve sinful components, which are specifically mentioned (like fornication, impurity, etc.).

 

[Byhisgrace21]

As human beings, we have to touch. Especially guys. If you don't touch, you'll eventually develope a testosterone build up which causes cancer and other sexual related diseases. Its in our divine nature to touch. That's the way that God intended it. Although, He didn't intend for us to use sexual lust, its quite hard to touch to anything else.

I don't agree with with God intending for us to touch. Masturbation is something that i stuggled with also and trust me i used every excuse to justify it. No matter what i still felt guilty. Thats why you are feeling guilty cause you are sinning. As far as the "cancer" you can get from not doing it there are alot of other more effective ways to combat it. and its not from a testosterone build up, its just that when you [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse] its helps flush out your prostate and keep it clean but if you eat alot of antioxidants like from blueberries or tomatoes its just as effective. You are looking to man for answers and as christians we have to look to our father and Lord. Masturbation isn't like all the other sins sexual sins are sins against the body and remember that your body is occupied by Christ now so when you touch you are sinning against him and making him go through that. Its kinda weird to see that but its true when you are masturbating he is there watching you and trust me when you realize that it will be harder to do and easier to let go of. I think that anyone that says they can do it without lusting is lieing to themselves because just to get an erection you have to have some mental stimulus having to do with lust or sexuality lets be honest you can't think of Mickey mouse and touch. I don't wanna sound like i'm coming down on you but i went throught the exact thing you are going through and its still hard to watch tv and see hot women and not have lustful thoughts but i just change the channel and ask the lord to help me through it cause the devil is always tempting us and remember that. So just pray and ask the Lord to deliver you from this and give you freedom and look for him and you'll get through this but the first step is wanting to let go. if you don't want to let go there is nothing he can do cause just like when you recieved Christ you have to LET him work in your life. if you want to talk more about this even if you dissagree with me just email me rxpower@hotmail.com or on aim i'm nsrxpower and msn is my hotmail sn. God Bless

 

[oneiric]

I agree byhisgrace. With every sin we try to justify it in order to keep doing it. It's a ploy by none other than the greatest of all Liars. Don't fall into it, it can destroy you.

 

[fiveinjuly]

I wanna have sex with my husband every night when I get married...or at least as often as possible, but maybe I'm just naive

Amen to that!