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servantsheart4God

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to AWorkInProgress:
Sitting on the floor with a high ceiling and 4 white walls surrounding me, trying to figure out where i go wrong, realizing my apparent EAD syndrome (emmediate attachment and dependancy)...going back to my music playlist to remind myself of my joyful heart...

"my EAD syndrome affects the heart and leads me to depend on others for what my spirit seeks in God: encouragement, affirmation & reassurance. When i dont get my 'fix', i have withdrawals of feeling abandoned and deserted to fend for myself, leaving me with a sense of no self worth...again....(sigh), and end up crying."

"In the process of an episode of EAD, my spirit (truth-my phone line to God) doesnt intervene, it stands aside, and instead allows the heart (feeling- desires, emotions overcome) to step in and do what it wills. My spirit is so dead that it cant be allowed to take over my heart, hence the emediate need for encouragement in others, rather than God."

"I didn't find it in you at the time, which means i am looking only to you for it, which i know i shouldn't. When i least expect it that's when you encourage me, but my heart gets used to it and looks for it when an episode approaches. Thats where i have to let my spirit come in and intervene in telling me that even though God will use you, He is the lifter of my head..."

to me:
"No offence, but it sounds like over detailed version of loneliness."

"Inner self needs love and affection, as well have a swelling need to give it. If we don't build bridges and keep it all inside, that void will effect us. I know it all too well, it saps the strength...feel so dead inside. I learned how to feel nothing, but we need love."

"Natural feeling is that seeking love in a mate will fill it, but really it doesn't. Learning how to find joy from within and sharing ourselves with each other is only cure I know."

"If I didn't be myself, help others and you. I still be writing more lyrics about why I am so empty inside. Because I listen to my heart, that I have the abundance of love I share with you."

"We grew up emotionally strong and afraid of ourselves. Lord will give us the courage, understanding, and love to help our wounds heal."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
If you're reading this honey, thank you for your insight and helping me to see what I couldnt.

luv u,
your other wing
 
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Sindyan

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to AWorkInProgress:
Sitting on the floor with a high ceiling and 4 white walls surrounding me, trying to figure out where i go wrong, realizing my apparent EAD syndrome (emmediate attachment and dependancy)...going back to my music playlist to remind myself of my joyful heart...

"my EAD syndrome affects the heart and leads me to depend on others for what my spirit seeks in God: encouragement, affirmation & reassurance. When i dont get my 'fix', i have withdrawals of feeling abandoned and deserted to fend for myself, leaving me with a sense of no self worth...again....(sigh), and end up crying."

"In the process of an episode of EAD, my spirit (truth-my phone line to God) doesnt intervene, it stands aside, and instead allows the heart (feeling- desires, emotions overcome) to step in and do what it wills. My spirit is so dead that it cant be allowed to take over my heart, hence the emediate need for encouragement in others, rather than God."

"I didn't find it in you at the time, which means i am looking only to you for it, which i know i shouldn't. When i least expect it that's when you encourage me, but my heart gets used to it and looks for it when an episode approaches. Thats where i have to let my spirit come in and intervene in telling me that even though God will use you, He is the lifter of my head..."

to me:
"No offence, but it sounds like over detailed version of loneliness."

"Inner self needs love and affection, as well have a swelling need to give it. If we don't build bridges and keep it all inside, that void will effect us. I know it all too well, it saps the strength...feel so dead inside. I learned how to feel nothing, but we need love."

"Natural feeling is that seeking love in a mate will fill it, but really it doesn't. Learning how to find joy from within and sharing ourselves with each other is only cure I know."

"If I didn't be myself, help others and you. I still be writing more lyrics about why I am so empty inside. Because I listen to my heart, that I have the abundance of love I share with you."

"We grew up emotionally strong and afraid of ourselves. Lord will give us the courage, understanding, and love to help our wounds heal."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
If you're reading this honey, thank you for your insight and helping me to see what I couldnt.

luv u,
your other wing
Thanks for sharing Servant!
 
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Sindyan

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Small Prayer Request:

I have a doctor's appointment tomorrow morning for a follow up about my meds. Just pray all goes well. I'm not too worried about it so yeah.

Of course my friend!

lol!^_^ That'd be a negative! I was talking about the shaving of the head.


Hahaha, I can give you lots of tips!!!

-anthony
 
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servantsheart4God

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Thanks for sharing Servant!

yeah well, didnt even see it to be as 'simple' as loneliness, as apposed to as complex as i made it to be. that's how i thought to post it here...

isnt that like a woman to turn it into something complex???? :doh:... :sorry:
 
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Sindyan

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yeah well, didnt even see it to be as 'simple' as loneliness, as apposed to as complex as i made it to be. that's how i thought to post it here...

isnt that like a woman to turn it into something complex???? :doh:... :sorry:
Hahaha,
This thread is not simple at all. We have had people dealing with self esteem issues to disabilities even to depression. Your struggle is a very important to all of us. It's not "complex" it's you...and your struggle...even more so your story.
 
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Sindyan

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Not when logical men cn understand your feelings and emotions!

Sindyan, you know the song, "O Lord it's hard to be humble when you're perfect in every way! " Try that one on for size! :D ^_^ ^_^

That's our theme song for our amazing, and beautiful bald people.

I don't think it's hard to be humble when you're perfect, I personally don't have this problem.

Hahaha^_^:p

Haha...Singing....we hijacked your thread again.
 
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PeculiarTreasure

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Haha...Singing....we hijacked your thread again.


It's quite alright guys! I'm just glad to see us all so happy for a change!:clap:


The doctor went well btw! I don't have to go back for 6 months! Thanks for the prayers everyone!:groupray:
 
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AWorkInProgress

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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
If you're reading this honey, thank you for your insight and helping me to see what I couldnt.

luv u,
your other wing

My pleasure babe,

Months back I did the same with other issues. I would think and think and think and think. As well I burnt out and burnt out and burnt out. Finally one day I tried tackling the problem with a clear mind. And Rush's philosophy is that answers are usually very simple, just sometimes we don't want to believe it is. So I applied it and he was right.

Answer usually very simple, problem is understanding the answer. Think it more of a fear/control thing, but understanding gives you a clear picture of problem and the answer.

Proverbs 19:8
To acquire wisdom is to love oneself;
people who cherish understanding will prosper.
 
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servantsheart4God

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My pleasure babe,

Months back I did the same with other issues. I would think and think and think and think. As well I burnt out and burnt out and burnt out. Finally one day I tried tackling the problem with a clear mind. And Rush's philosophy is that answers are usually very simple, just sometimes we don't want to believe it is. So I applied it and he was right.

Answer usually very simple, problem is understanding the answer. Think it more of a fear/control thing, but understanding gives you a clear picture of problem and the answer.

Proverbs 19:8
To acquire wisdom is to love oneself;
people who cherish understanding will prosper.

o-i-c...but, please explain to me again the fear/control concept. How would that play its part in this?...and why?
 
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AWorkInProgress

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Fear/control concept can be found here.

As for it's relation to wisdom seeking... just an assumption or something for me to ponder. I not given it the proper energy and time to develope.

It started with thought about how people accept wisdom. Jesus asked Simon Peter to throw his net over, there was some rebellion but he did it. Now for me, I can't do that or not that offen. I need to understand why before I do follow a direction. I know I lived a life of fear. Peter on the other hand was braver than the rest of the bunch.

Faith vs Fear? umm.. Trust vs fear? Someone with little to no fear is more willing to try something different than someone who is full of fear and wants control.
 
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servantsheart4God

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Fear/control concept can be found here.

As for it's relation to wisdom seeking... just an assumption or something for me to ponder. I not given it the proper energy and time to develope.

It started with thought about how people accept wisdom. Jesus asked Simon Peter to throw his net over, there was some rebellion but he did it. Now for me, I can't do that or not that offen. I need to understand why before I do follow a direction. I know I lived a life of fear. Peter on the other hand was braver than the rest of the bunch.

Faith vs Fear? umm.. Trust vs fear? Someone with little to no fear is more willing to try something different than someone who is full of fear and wants control.

thanks honey!
 
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PeculiarTreasure

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I feel like well...crap today.:( Read my "What a night" thread for more info. If ya'll can pray that I can just get through this school day that'd be most awesome. I would'nt have come but I have two tests.:sigh:
 
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servantsheart4God

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I feel like well...crap today.:( Read my "What a night" thread for more info. If ya'll can pray that I can just get through this school day that'd be most awesome. I would'nt have come but I have two tests.:sigh:

be praying peace, clarity of mind and contentment in your day, dear friend - walk with Jesus today :hug:
 
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