John Stott, on singleness

[paul1149]

CT just published a pretty good interview with the late John Stott on his lifelong singleness. It may be worth a read.

John Stott on Singleness | Christianity Today

 

[Verve]

Interesting.

 

[trentlogain2]

hmm. that was pretty short and simple. interesting read though.

 

[Nanopants]

I hate to be a critic, but seriously I've had it with super-spiritual teachings.

Celibacy is a gift... if it isn't received as such then it's not a gift that has been given.

In other words, if you aren't happy to be single I sincerely doubt that that is God's will for you.

 

[paul1149]

I'm not clear on how you got a "super-spiritual" impression from this article. For instance, it starts out with:

We must never exalt singleness (as some early church fathers did, notably Tertullian) as if it were a higher and holier vocation than marriage. We must reject the ascetic tradition which disparages sex as legalized lust, and marriage as legalized fornication. No, no. Sex is the good gift of a good Creator, and marriage is his own institution.

If marriage is good, singleness is also good. It's an example of the balance of Scripture that, although Genesis 2:18 indicates that it is good to marry, 1 Corinthians 7:1 (in answer to a question posed by the Corinthians) says that "it is good for a man not to marry." So both the married and the single states are "good"; neither is in itself better or worse than the other.
​

And goes from there. That sounds pretty down-to-earth to me.

BTW, threadgoers, I mistakenly linked to the second page of the interview. The beginning url is:

John Stott on Singleness

 

[Nanopants]

I'm not clear on how you got a "super-spiritual" impression from this article. For instance, it starts out with:

We must never exalt singleness (as some early church fathers did, notably Tertullian) as if it were a higher and holier vocation than marriage. We must reject the ascetic tradition which disparages sex as legalized lust, and marriage as legalized fornication. No, no. Sex is the good gift of a good Creator, and marriage is his own institution.

If marriage is good, singleness is also good. It's an example of the balance of Scripture that, although Genesis 2:18 indicates that it is good to marry, 1 Corinthians 7:1 (in answer to a question posed by the Corinthians) says that "it is good for a man not to marry." So both the married and the single states are "good"; neither is in itself better or worse than the other.
​

And goes from there. That sounds pretty down-to-earth to me.

BTW, threadgoers, I mistakenly linked to the second page of the interview. The beginning url is:

John Stott on Singleness

The author says don't fight being called to singleness. That may not be as "super-spiritual" as some other teachings, but simply put the words of Christ are:

His disciples say unto him, If the case of the man be so with [his] wife, it is not good to marry. But he said unto them, All [men] cannot receive this saying, save [they] to whom it is given. ... He that is able to receive [it], let him receive [it].

To go any further than this is to attempt to raise the bar beyond what is true.

 

[dewba]

Thanks.

I do agree that both being married and single are good states (have their pros and cons) but I don't agree that one is better than the other...

1 Cor 7:28 those who marry will face many troubles in this life, and I want to spare you this.

It seems to me that being married brings more problems than being single from that scripture. It also seems to me, from that scripture, that it's possible to embrace singleness. From that scripture, it doesn't seem like we were "meant" to be married or single, as God's "gift"/chosen destiny. We have a choice.

 

[dewba]

The scripture in 1 Cor 7 kind of makes it seem like marriage is a sort of masochistic action...like...why would you choose marriage if it brings more problems than singleness? After reading that...why would you choose marriage? choose more pain?

 

[Nanopants]

Not everything Paul wrote was directly from God. The early Christians were expecting to see the end of the world within their life time. If the world is about to end then why even bother with that nonsense?

 

[dewba]

All Christians should expect the end of the world at all times...

 

[Nanopants]

All Christians should expect the end of the world at all times...

True, but, does that mean we should stop procreating?

 

[dewba]

Anyways, it makes sense, though...singleness being less trouble than marriage, I mean.

I believe God gave us the freedom to choose, so I'm not looking down on people who are married or anything. I guess I just feel bad for married people...they do have more problems than a single person...I guess I have to work on accepting things that cannot be changed and moving on...

 

[dewba]

True, but, does that mean we should stop procreating?

Lol; I'm definitely not saying that people should stop having babies. I surely believe in choice. It does make me think, though...perhaps if Christians stopped having babies, the end would come sooner...horrible thought, I know...but it's just a thought. makes me wonder; just a theory. pointless, really.

 

[dewba]

BTW, my last statement stems from thinking that God is waiting for everyone to convert. I suppose that we should keep having babies to spread the Word, then

 

[Nanopants]

Well, if it were God's will I'm sure he would have said so. Instead, in his wisdom he says (in not so few words): don't prohibit these things.

 

[dewba]

true that...

 

[paul1149]

The author says don't fight being called to singleness. That may not be as "super-spiritual" as some other teachings, but simply put the words of Christ are:
...
To go any further than this is to attempt to raise the bar beyond what is true.

What he said was:

if God calls you to singleness, don't fight it. Remember the key text: "Each person has his or her own gift of God's grace" (1 Cor. 7:7).
​

He also says other things such as:

If singleness is a gift, however, so is marriage.​

I see a lot of balance in those statements, and no pressure. If God calls you to singleness, would you want to fight it? Would that be good advice to give?

 

[trentlogain2]

The scripture in 1 Cor 7 kind of makes it seem like marriage is a sort of masochistic action...like...why would you choose marriage if it brings more problems than singleness? After reading that...why would you choose marriage? choose more pain?

The Bible also tells us that all who will live godly in Christ Jesus will suffer persecution. (2 Tim. 3:12)

 

[Nanopants]

What he said was:

if God calls you to singleness, don't fight it. Remember the key text: "Each person has his or her own gift of God's grace" (1 Cor. 7:7).
​

He also says other things such as:

If singleness is a gift, however, so is marriage.​

I see a lot of balance in those statements, and no pressure. If God calls you to singleness, would you want to fight it? Would that be good advice to give?

I would say, if God has called us to singleness, we would find no fight within us. To tell someone not to fight it is to put on the pressure, and strays from God's teaching.

 

[paul1149]

I don't find that reasonable. I'm aware of many people who have fought the call of God, and some have resisted it altogether. It's not an automatic thing, and I simply find Stott's advice to be wise and friendly.

You're entitled to your opinion, of course, but I wanted to be clear on what the article says, so no one would be kept from what they might find to be an edifying read.