Is self pleasuring a sin?

[swordsman]

repressing masturbation while single once you have engaged in it only makes the problem obsessive and problematic.

I don't know how it makes the problem obsessive and problematic. I have abstained from that deed for 257 days and I have no problem. I think Dobson's wrong in this view....bigtime. Masturbation may be 'normal' in this sex-crazed world but it's not 'normal' in God's eyes. Normal means: "Up to a certain level/standard".

Check out some of the people who are abstaining from it, especially the guys in the men/pornographic section. There are a few threads there, which include mine....and there are guys that are abstaining, and have been incredibly blessed by it. I'd encourage you to take their word for it, rather than Dobson's.

 

[droidean]

after reading this thread...i have been inspired to stop....infact...im gunna get out my sharpie and put an x through every day i make it!!! and im not even joking here!!! im seriosly gonna try to stop...it sounds like life is better with out it....but i also have never had a wet dream...and i hope i dont when i try to stop...

 

[Danielof the Island]

I got bored with it, and quit. I can't remember the last time I did it. I think it's been several days...

Thoughts?

 

[swordsman]

QUESTION: My 13-year-old son is at the full bloom of adolescence. I'm suspicious that he may be masturbating when he's alone, but I don't quite know how to approach him about it. Should I be concerned, and if so, what should I say to him?


DR. DOBSON: I don't think you should invade that private world at all unless there are unique circumstances that lead you to do so. I offer that advice while acknowledging that masturbation is a highly controversial subject and parents differ widely in their perspectives on it. I will answer your question, but I hope you understand that better men and women than I will differ radically and emotionally with what I will say.

First, let's consider masturbation from a medical perspective. We can say without fear of contradiction that there is no scientific evidence to indicate that this act is harmful to the body. Despite terrifying warnings given to young people historically, it does not cause blindness, weakness, mental retardation or any other physical problem.

If it did, the entire male population and about half of all females would be blind, weak, simpleminded and sick. Between 95 percent to 98 percent of all boys engage in this practice -- and the rest have been known to lie (1). It is as close to universal behavior as is likely to occur. A lesser but still significant percentage of girls also engage in what was once called "self-gratification." As for the emotional consequences of masturbation, only three circumstances should give us cause for concern. The first is when it is associated with oppressive guilt from which the individual can't escape. That guilt has the potential to do considerable psychological and spiritual damage. A boy may promise a thousand times with great sincerity never again to commit this despicable act. Then a week or two passes, or perhaps several months. Eventually, the hormonal pressures accumulate until nearly every waking moment reverberates with sexual desire. Finally, in a moment (and I do mean "a moment") of weakness, it happens again (2). I am convinced that some teens have thrown over their faith because of their inability to please God on this point of masturbation.

(1)
wrong!!...I know of some guys that haven't done it, and...some that don't even know what masturbation is. Although they are in the vast minority in today's society, they exist.

(2)
Jude 1:24 Now unto him that is able to keep you from falling, and to present you faultless before the presence of his glory with exceeding joy"

Also, Jesus said to His disciples:

Matthew 26:41 "Watch and pray, that ye enter not into temptation: the spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak."

Jesus said: "WATCH"....ie: stay alert for any attack from the enemy...his temptations...

AND...

"PRAY"....ie: Go to God and talk to Him about what is happening.

What really annoys me about Dobson is that he doesn't provide any hope for a person who would be addicted to masturbation. (I'm not referring to the ones who claim to not be addicted to masturbation).

Now, Dobson would surely know that there are millions of teens who are addicted to this fleshy lust, and yet he doesn't provide any hope whatsoever... I find that very disappointing from him. Regardless of whether the fleshy lust involves cheesecakes (gluttony), painkillers, masturbation, cutting, smoking, marijuana, alcohol, porn...etc. We as Christians should be living in FREEDOM!...not with an addiction! Regardless if you're a 14-year-old male in adolescence! (John 8:32) (1Corinthians 7:22)

 

[GQ Chris]

A few verses came to mind when I was reading through this thread. I admit I do it, sometimes 2-3 times a day like clockwork in the morning, but if it came to it I would rather touch than fornicate.


Romans 8:5-13

For they that are after the flesh do mind the things of the flesh; but they that are after the Spirit the things of the Spirit.


6For to be carnally minded is death; but to be spiritually minded is life and peace.

7Because the carnal mind is enmity against God: for it is not subject to the law of God, neither indeed can be.

8So then they that are in the flesh cannot please God.

9But ye are not in the flesh, but in the Spirit, if so be that the Spirit of God dwell in you. Now if any man have not the Spirit of Christ, he is none of his.

10And if Christ be in you, the body is dead because of sin; but the Spirit is life because of righteousness.

11But if the Spirit of him that raised up Jesus from the dead dwell in you, he that raised up Christ from the dead shall also quicken your mortal bodies by his Spirit that dwelleth in you.

12Therefore, brethren, we are debtors, not to the flesh, to live after the flesh. 13For if ye live after the flesh, ye shall die: but if ye through the Spirit do mortify the deeds of the body, ye shall live.

 

[GQ Chris]

You know, I struggle with this problem. But only because if it came down to it I would choose masturbation over fornication.

I am not proud of the fact that I do it, and I really should make a better effort to not do it at all.

 

[GQ Chris]

The spirit is willing but the flesh is weak.

 

[LovesLife]

.

 

[ascribe2thelord]

I've an honest and sincere question. I discovered "self pleasure" in the shower some 2-3 years ago. I've done it ever sinse. However, I don't get "pleasure" out of it... it's more like a release, that's the best word I can think of. I don't know why I do it, I just do. However, I've decided that not knowing if it's a sin is too risky, so as of tonight, I've made the decission to cease in such actions.

My question:

Is it a sin to do it once a day, before bed, to avoid waking up with a "mess" in the morning?

Thanks for your input.

Incase there's any question, this is not a struggle. It's not a temptation, I just do it out of boredom, really... However, if it is a sin regardless, then I have no problem with ceasing to do "it." Thanks again for your input.

Since you're young and probably haven't gotten into porn (from what I can tell, you don't seem to know too much about the guilt some people have from it) I think it's perfectly okay for you.

I mean, I started when I was fourteen and I felt like it was a shameful thing because nobody told me it was normal, that it didn't mean you're gay (or at least I didn't turn out that way), and that it could actually be beneficial to self-esteem and keep you from having sex before marriage (if you might someday end up in that kind of a situation).

Chances are what other people will tell you is that it is self-abuse, or that it defiles. (That comes from a Hebrew myth that sperm cells are dead and that touching anything that is dead is sinful/unclean.) Others might say it's a lust of the flesh. Personally I believe all that guilt is the devil's way of telling spiritual people that they are at odds with God. Best advice is don't fall into the "masturbation is sin" crowd ... because it is only an addiction if you call it one.

You might as well say we're addicted to eating junk food, and that is sinful. Because after all, by classification, that could also be considered a lust of the flesh!

 

[ascribe2thelord]

This is pretty amazing and embaressing but I'm going to go ahead and say it.

My understand is that masturbation is infact a sin and here is how I know..

I was doing it myself and once I had release I went to the bathroom to dispose of it...As I sat down then to use the toilet I wondered to myself God...Is this a sin? Thinking I would skim over the bible to see if I could find anything in there about it I reached to the counter and opened up the book to a random page. The first thing I saw were these words....

"The law concerning bodily discharges"

Just as I had asked God aloud if it was a sin I opened to the EXACT page that it talks about it! I was stunned.

Look it up for yourself...Leviticus 15:01 page 101 of the old testament.

Hmm, well if this is so, then you are committing a sin by wearing a shirt made out of more than one fabric. Polyester and cotton? Not acceptable to God. Unclean. Oh, and do you eat any unclean animals? Pork? That's disgusting! You wicked unbeliever!

 

[ascribe2thelord]

I don't know how it makes the problem obsessive and problematic. I have abstained from that deed for 257 days and I have no problem. I think Dobson's wrong in this view....bigtime. Masturbation may be 'normal' in this sex-crazed world but it's not 'normal' in God's eyes. Normal means: "Up to a certain level/standard".

Check out some of the people who are abstaining from it, especially the guys in the men/pornographic section. There are a few threads there, which include mine....and there are guys that are abstaining, and have been incredibly blessed by it. I'd encourage you to take their word for it, rather than Dobson's.

Um, mikkey, I touch and I'm not some sex-crazed freak. I'm about as normal as anyone else, actually maybe even below average when it comes to lust ... because I don't even look for porn. I think James Dobson might be a bit off with saying that a guy "has to do it every so often" because if not his innards will explode ... I know it's not true, because of all the people who have stopped.

I think we need some sort of middle ground in this thread ... because there will always be some people actively promoting masturbation, and some who loathe the "sin of self-pleasuring" because they are obsessed with trying to get rid of it, because it causes them to feel guilty before God.

My suggestion is that if you're young like the guy who first posted ... don't try to remove the masturbation entirely from your life, but don't let it consume every waking moment either. If you do feel guilty about it, make sure those convictions actually do come from God, and not just from social pressure around you. And make sure it's not the devil accusing you, putting all your focus on masturbation because he wants to distract you from a serious area of sin in your life. (Prayerlessness, an unloving spirit, hate - that's murder you know - and lying especially can be ignored if you are concerned about masturbation keeping you from a close relationship with God.)

I remind everyone that sexual immorality, by definition, requires two people. You cannot defile the temple of the Holy Spirit - your body - with your own body. It doesn't work that way!

I hope this clears things up for all the worried teenagers here. You might continue believing that what you've accidentally "discovered" is a sin, but I find no place in the Bible where fathers are instructed to keep their children from masturbating. (Trust me, if God considered masturbation a sin, he would have put a provision somewhere in the books of the Law calling it an offense or an abomination, and telling fathers to warn their sons against it. The closest the Bible gets to actually speaking about masturbation is "unclean" bodily discharges and there's nothing wrong at all with that, except in ritualised, Orthodox Jewish worship.)

And I think we all know that as Christians we who now worship the Father in spirit and in truth are above the lexicon of "clean and unclean." If it's okay for us to eat pork and then worship God the same day, then likewise, it's okay to touch and then worship God the same day.

 

[Komplex001]

I still don't see how you could possibly touch without lust. Even if you did not, why risk it?

 

[GQ Chris]

I like what Richard Foster says about masturbation in his book, "Money, Sex, and Power". I think he has the right view of it.

 

[melvaughn]

I've taken classes on "Human Sexuality" in college, and learned that many sexual dysfunctions and orgasmic problems can be cured with masturbation. I just think if you never touch yourself, you will get married and not have a clue how your body works and will have definite problems learning to relax and enjoy sex. According to this class, masturbation is a remedy for these problems, because it makes you comfortable with your body. It makes complete rational sense to me and has benefited myself in many ways. As long as you don't let it control your life, there is no harm in discovering your body. If I hadn't touched myself, I would have never even known I had a vagina opening!!! And since I want to wait until marriage, if I hadn't learned how my body worked or how to give myself pleasure, I can see that it would have presented huge problems... And why would God create the [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse]-that has no reproductive functions except for pleasure and is on the outside of the vagina---mind you, very conveniently placed to make masturbation tempting. Why is that? It doens't make sense to me. I just don't want to 'never' touch myself and then be all uptight when I get married and derive no pleasure from sex because I never learned to give myself pleasure. How can you 'teach' a guy what 'works' for you, if you don't know yourself?

 

[melvaughn]

Isn't it also a sin to let guilt control your life? All of these posts I've read seem guilt-ridden, and I don't think God intended for one to be walking around in state of constant guilt. Sure we are are living in sin, but one can't become too paranoid to the point where you can't enjoy your life! I think people should feel good about themselves, not hating themselves because of the unrealistic 'rules' they couldn't follow at every moment of their life.

 

[swordsman]

Um, mikkey, I touch and I'm not some sex-crazed freak. I'm about as normal as anyone else, actually maybe even below average when it comes to lust ... because I don't even look for porn. I think James Dobson might be a bit off with saying that a guy "has to do it every so often" because if not his innards will explode ... I know it's not true, because of all the people who have stopped.

I never even had an iota of a thought to consider you or anyone else who masturbates a 'sex-crazed freak'. re-read my post...

 

[LovesLife]

I like what Richard Foster says about masturbation in his book, "Money, Sex, and Power". I think he has the right view of it.

OK, so what DOES he say?!?!

 

[swordsman]

Dr Dobson is a realist. Many others have done a real injustice to many teenagers.
Young guys do need a release. I thought it was so noble to abstain. I was wrong, wrong. I refer young men to Dr Dobson. today's movies leave many young guys
in a quantry. Simply masterbating within reason takes a lot of pressure off for them, rather than hitting upon someone's precious daughter and all of its sad after affects.

Men can touch excessively and then can hit on someone's precious daughter. That is more of a matter of choice for that person. Whether a person masturbates or not isn't the issue here...it's what in the person's heart.

This 'taking off pressure' excuse, is all that it is...an excuse, and it's a withdrawal syptom of the body, because the body is craving to be fed...again. Many guys that are abstaining are feeling perfectly fine, like me. I don't have this 'pressure' anymore, because now my body is used to operating without masturbation.

tell me...what does this verse mean to you?

1 Peter 2:11 Dearly beloved, I beseech you as strangers and pilgrims, abstain from fleshly lusts, which war against the soul

 

[OttawaUk]

I think the key to whether or not it is a sin is this:

"You have heard that it was said to those of old, 'You shall not commit adultery. But I say to you that whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart." (Mat 5:27-29)

These are the words of the Lord Jesus Christ.

I don't know if its possible to touch without lusting in one form or another, so technically each time it is done, we're committing adultry in our hearts with the person we are fantasizing about.

That's what caused me to ask the Lord to help me get it out of my life and its been gone for months now. Praise the Lord!

 

[swordsman]

I've an honest and sincere question. I discovered "self pleasure" in the shower some 2-3 years ago. I've done it ever sinse. However, I don't get "pleasure" out of it... it's more like a release, that's the best word I can think of. I don't know why I do it, I just do. However, I've decided that not knowing if it's a sin is too risky, so as of tonight, I've made the decission to cease in such actions.

My question:

Is it a sin to do it once a day, before bed, to avoid waking up with a "mess" in the morning?

Thanks for your input.

Incase there's any question, this is not a struggle. It's not a temptation, I just do it out of boredom, really... However, if it is a sin regardless, then I have no problem with ceasing to do "it." Thanks again for your input.

Masturbation is not mentioned in the bible to be a sin or not. It is silent on that topic. However, I do encourage you to stop doing the act, and I believe in future your body will thank you for it. Flee youthful and fleshy lusts (1Peter 2:11 and 2Tim 2:22), as said in the bible.

As for the mess in the morning...well, that's unfortunate and it does happen. If you don't touch, the sperm either comes out via nocturnal emmisions or it'll be dumped in your urinary tract. My body has chosen to use the urinary tract about 90% of the time.

Also, if you or anyone else is addicted to it...they should certainly stop.