I could walk you through it and give the right "key" if you like...?
What makes you think you are the one I can get it from? I have done quite a bit of reading of my own.
And I can only start by asking you, "If there was a God, and He was the absolute highest God above and beyond all and everything, etc, what do think that One, or such a One, would have to, out of necessity, be like, etc...?"
That being than which none greater can be conceived cannot not exist.
I honestly don't know what features that being would have. In fact I doubt
any human who tells me they know. The logical difficulties with cases like "God" are so immense.
Some things I
hope are true about this God are:
1. He doesn't like genocide and would never allow 1Samuel 15:3 to be attributed to him or his prophet on his behalf.
2. He would make himself clear and obvious for all. The stakes are so high (eternal damnation is a pretty steep sentence for failure to get the faith perfect in a short 70 year lifespan).
What would such a One "have to be like", etc...?
I like logic. So God is all-merciful and all-just. Those are diametrically opposite.
God loves all the world so much so that he incarnated himself and then arranged to have himself sacrificed
to himself to atone mankind to Him. Blood was necessary. An analogue of the blood sacrifices that were pleasing to the Lord in the Old Testament. The final blood sacrifice. Because God is, at heart, a God who values pain to atone to Him. Because he loves everyone. Unless they fail to accept His gift. And then He is saddened to send those people to damnation. But to damnation they go. The saddest part is that all they had to do was accept that gift. Even the people who, millennia after the blood gift was given, fail to see evidence of such a blood gift.
God would never put a stumbling block in front of anyone. Except to create a world that by every metric looks as if it is very old and life arose and changed and evolved, in direct contradiction to the
words of Genesis. And evidence for the single most important concept in all of human history is...lacking at best. Absent at worst.
God would never create someone for whom worship of Him would cause pain and agony. But the OCD wings of hospitals across the globe are filled with people for whom faith is pain worse than you can imagine (trust me on this one). How cruel would it be to create people who dearly want to worship Him correctly but for whom that task becomes so impossible that life stops being life and becomes a form of hell? Answer: very cruel. Cruel beyond reason. Cruel beyond logic.
Now before you launch into a zillion exegeses and explanations of how these people have "faith all wrong" I will just go ahead and stop you there. This is a likely feature they were born with and it relates to serotonin reuptake in synapses in the brain. Medicines can help. God usually seems to turn a blind ear to the pleas of those who want that cup taken from them.
I'm not saying God is a "bad being". Quite the contrary. I'm saying the concept of God is loaded up with so many logical difficulties as to beggar the imagination as to how God could simultaneously exist and reality be reality.