Interfering Strangers!

[£amb]

You may not be able to control how someone talks or acts towards you, but you can control how you react to someone. I work in a Preschool and hear the most obnoxious things froms mothers. Instead of me reacting and snapping back I kill them with kindness. It's amazing what kind words can do to someone's mood or attitude. I've built trusting relationships with mothers who I thought were nutty upon the first time talking and meeting with them.

 

[Leanna]

Okay, so my hubby and kids were at Home Depot this weekend picking out paint. It was a nice family trip, deciding on colors, etc. As they were mixing our paint, we walked over to choose our paint brushes, tape, etc. I noticed my shopping cart was a bit in the way, so I moved it over some. Two of my children were in the cart, the third was standing next to it. They were entertained with various circulars, paint colors on papers, etc. My husband was pretty close to them, so I decided to walk a little further down the isle. I saw a few people starting to walk down the isle, so I decided to go and make sure the car was not in the way. Then this lady says to me "are these your kids?" and I said "yes" and she says, "well, you really shouldn't leave them so far away" so I said "why don't you mind your own business, I am right here!" and she says "I could have walked away with them" and I said "oh no you couldn't!"

Then I took the cart to go to then next isle and she passes by me again and gives me a mean look and so I said "at least I have my kids with me, where are yours!" She said absolutely nothing to my face, then proceeded to say "irresponsible parent" as soon as she started walking away.

My husband said that she probably didn't realize he was with me, so it looked like I really was far away, but still, it's not that big of a deal!

Comments? Opinions?

 

[Leanna]

Hmm well I would have just said "They're my children, and my responsibility, you're here to shop" and then there wouldn't be anything else to be said.

 

[Diane_Windsor]

A kind word turns away wrath.

Hurting people hurt others. Yes, she was in the wrong. But maybe you could have smiled and told her you love your children dearly and that is why your husband was right next to them. Then thank her for her concern and say a silent prayer for what ever is causing her pain.

Mark Strohm, Jr.

I concur.

DIANE

 

[Leanna]

I concur.

DIANE

Personally I feel that helping them understand the situation (my children, you're shopping) can be done in a very gentle way. Some people forget their place.

 

[Ashlynn]

Yes, the woman was nosy, but if you know you are doing what is right, you should never feel the need to have defend yourself, especially to a stranger. I think asking her about her kids was equally out of line.

I know there are some moms out there who have a bed that no child sleeps in now, because they are gone. Those moms too thought "Oh no you won't", and they too were mad about nosy people interferring in their business. But I guarantee that they wished someone had interferred the day their kid was snatched away from them.
It'll never happen to me, is the most dangerous attitude anyone can take about anything.

 

[mrsperez]

Yes, the woman was nosy, but if you know you are doing what is right, you should never feel the need to have defend yourself, especially to a stranger. I think asking her about her kids was equally out of line.

I know there are some moms out there who have a bed that no child sleeps in now, because they are gone. Those moms too thought "Oh no you won't", and they too were mad about nosy people interferring in their business. But I guarantee that they wished someone had interferred the day their kid was snatched away from them.
It'll never happen to me, is the most dangerous attitude anyone can take about anything.

I'm not sure if you thought that I had the "it would never happen to me" attitude or if that was a general comment. But just to make myself clear, I know to never say never, and I definately don't know what would happen tomorrow. But, she upset me, and I let her know that. Was I right? I don't know, maybe not. But it's just the way I felt at the moment, and I really don't regret it.

 

[mrsperez]

Personally I feel that helping them understand the situation (my children, you're shopping) can be done in a very gentle way. Some people forget their place.

That is the exact reason I said what I said. I have my family and friends and church members that help me day in and day out with advice, etc. But it was not her place, a complete stranger, to butt in, insult me, etc.

Have any of you seen any of those 20/20 shows where they put a couple out in a park somewhere and have them "act" as if they are arguing, as if the man is abusive, and the woman is in distress??? How many people come to her rescue? Did any of you see last week? They had two couples, one caucasian and one African American. It was horrible. Only one woman came to the African American woman's rescue. But yet, people are stopping me at the store and telling me I'm too far away from my children. Come on man!!!!!