There's nothing to be afraid of love,
You are a child of God. You are a matter of steps away from heaven and being with your Lord.
Whether that means ten steps or ten thousand doesnt matter, the time it takes to get there is not the priority, what matters is that you are right now, living in an eternal life and this worldy state is just a small, tiny portion of it, a blink of the eye compared to your eternal reality.
( 2 Cor.4:16 )
" Therefore we do not lose heart. Even though our outward man is perishing, yet the inward man is being renewed day by day. For our light afflictions, which are but for a moment, are working for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory; while, we do not look at the things which are seen but at the things which are not seen, for the things which are seen are temporary but the things which are not seen are eternal. "
What you are fearing right now are your senses, the things you can see and feel, but as this passage reveals, the truth is that our suffering here is just a second in time compared to the weight of ternal glory we really exist in.
So before you go to sleep my friend let your last thought be NOT on your body or your doctors or even your family, let it be on who and what you really are, an eternal child of God, on your way to wherever He chooses to send you, whether that be back here to this life for a little longer, or on to soke glorious adventure with Him in Heaven.
If I were you I would be more excited than scared. Yes it is certainly exhilarating and nervewracking, but it should not be scary if you can get your head on straight.
God bless you and look to the things of God in Heaven, not to the things of the earth, and your fears will subside.
( Col. 3:1-4 )
" If then you have been raised with Christ, seek the things which are above where Christ is, sitting at the right hand of God. Set your mind on the things above, not on the things of the world, for you died, and your life is hid with Christ in God. And when Christ, who is our life appears, so we also shall appear with Him in glory. "