Im so bored and lonely.

[Neostarwcc]

So my wife started her job at Walmart on the first. We've been together nonstop for the last 10 years 24 hours a day seven days a week. Now it seems like God has broken us apart and I am barely able to see her anymore. She works 4 am to 1 pm 4 days a week and I'm just getting sick of it. True, I usually wake up at 8-9 am and only have to occupy 4-5 hours out of my day but honestly? I'm just so darn lonely everyday she has to work. I can't really watch TV because everything we watch on TV we watch together and I don't feel like watching the same shows twice in one day. Not to mention she usually doesn't get home until 1:30. So I'm basically doing nothing for 6 hours a day. And then when she comes home from work she will start dinner and we will eat and maybe spend 10-15 minutes together. Then she's asleep until we go to bed a 8:30-9:00. Its... well it's annoying, lonely, and boring. I hate her working but since she got the job through food stamps she can't quit the job ever. So, I'm stuck with this.

What do you guys advise I do with my free time? Usually when she comes home we just talk until she falls asleep. Which is ok. I just wish we had time together to read the Bible, or watch sermons on YouTube, of catching up on the shows that are clogging up our DVR. I mean, that's all we did for 10 years together and quite frankly? I miss it. I miss my wife. We don't spend virtually any time together anymore sexual or otherwise because all she's doing is sleeping her life away. I get it. She's tired and I should be happy for her finally getting a job. But, I'm not happy. I miss my wife. Even on her 3 days off I barely get to spend time with her. I mean, where's the us time. Her life can't just be work most of the day and then sleep. Can it?

 

[Unqualified]

You will feel better when her first paycheck comes.

 

[timf]

Things to do to cure boredom;

1. Get a job
2. Have children
3. Volunteer or minister to others
4. Study the Bible

 

[SavedByGrace3]

A hobby will really fill your time up. One that you love (strong like) and enjoy. The sort of thing you think about even when you are not doing it. When I worked in the mill there was a lot of tedious no-brainer work where boredom was a problem. I was educated in college to do electronic circuit design and logic circuit design, While working I would design computer logic circuits in my head.. occasionally jot down a design. Point is it does not just occupy time, but also the mind. I also write praise songs. I will write and sing songs to and from work. I would leave work on the 20 minute drive home and suddenly realize I was home!

 

[PloverWing]

I agree that it's a big adjustment, getting used to the absence of someone you love, when you're used to having them around all the time. (I felt some of this when my children went away to college and then got homes of their own.)

If I understand your health situation, it's hard for you to leave the house. But I recommend finding some constructive things to do that can be done at home. Some ideas:

1. In many marriages where one spouse works and the other spouse is at home, the stay-at-home spouse does a lot of the housework. You could take on that work. Could you learn to cook, for example? You've said that your wife cooks dinner after she gets home from work. Suppose, instead, that you looked through some cookbooks or online recipes and cooked dinner for the two of you. Then your wife could come home to a dinner that you made for her.

1b. Similarly, some of my friends are into baking, breadmaking, cookie-decorating, cake-decorating, that kind of thing. That could be a creative hobby for you, and you get to eat what you make!

1c. Or, there are household tasks like gardening, woodworking, household repairs, etc., that you could do at home.

2. If you're technically inclined, and you enjoy working with computers, have you considered learning to program? You could get a book on an easy-to-learn language like Python, and maybe write your own games. If you get good at programming, there are jobs you can do without leaving the house. My niece and my daughter-in-law both work IT jobs from home.

3. Computers come to mind, because that's what I do for a living , but there are other skills you could work at and master over time.

My recommendation is to find something like this to fill your time. I feel really satisfied when I've created or fixed something.

 

[Dave G.]

I'm just surprised she's already home at 1:30.

 

[PloverWing]

I'm just surprised she's already home at 1:30.

The job starts at 4am (eek!), so by 1pm she has finished a 9-hour work day.

 

[Diamond7]

What do you guys advise

Most people would say get a job. If you have a disability, then get a hobby.

 

[Diamond7]

A hobby will really fill your time up.

People have gifts, talents and abilities. They are most happy when they develop and use them.

 

[Dave G.]

I'll pray for you that God will place on your heart a hobby and functions to perform, that more than fill the void in time. Because that's your answer. I'd just ask that you pray on it too, ask Him what you could do. I'd be surprised if something is not placed on your heart or a thought given.

 

[Neostarwcc]

You will feel better when her first paycheck comes.

I didn't marry her for the money u married her because I love her and I love being around her. But, you're right having extra money is nice.

 

[Neostarwcc]

A hobby will really fill your time up. One that you love (strong like) and enjoy. The sort of thing you think about even when you are not doing it. When I worked in the mill there was a lot of tedious no-brainer work where boredom was a problem. I was educated in college to do electronic circuit design and logic circuit design, While working I would design computer logic circuits in my head.. occasionally jot down a design. Point is it does not just occupy time, but also the mind. I also write praise songs. I will write and sing songs to and from work. I would leave work on the 20 minute drive home and suddenly realize I was home!

I've been playing video games to kinda pass the time but I don't want to always be playing video games and she is working 32-35 hours a week. Not to mention her naps which are sometimes uo to 3-4 hours. Idk I'm being selfish I get it. She got a job because I asked her to because we needed the money. And I'm a little scared as to how I'm going to bury myself and how if she stayed a house wife how she would support herself after I pass away. I'm on disability and that goes away after I die.


I'd like to get off of disability and us both working whether it's self employment for me or not would be a good way for the government to not tell me how to spend my money,

 

[Neostarwcc]

Most people would say get a job. If you have a disability, then get a hobby.

Yeah I'm disabled but I am good at fixing computers. I was thinking of maybe going back to school for PC repair and fix hard drives and things of that nature for a little extra money. I'm getting sick and tired of just wasting my life with tv and video games. I want to contribute to the household still and I think going back to school and getting my comptia certification would be a good idea. My whole disability check is gone right now but my wife does get paid next Thursday. After buying the essentialls I might sign up for a class. Sounds like a good idea anyway.

 

[Diamond7]

Yeah I'm disabled but I am good at fixing computers. I was thinking of maybe going back to school for PC repair and fix hard drives and things of that nature for a little extra money.

A little bit of advertising can go a long way. Even on social pages. Lots of people need a Geek Squad rescue. I know I do. I have been trying for HOURS to get set up a new modern. Right now I can not find the button on my router to push to get my wifi extender to work. I would be glad to pay someone to help me get this stuff straightened out.

Also if someone could figure out Amazon, I have a lot of stuff I could sell on there. But I do not have the time to figure out how it works. Also, you could sell stuff on Ebay for people to make a bit of money. Right now I have a bunch of track balls I need to get rid of. Some of them new unopened in the box.

There are lots and lots and lots of ways you could be making money and generating income.

 

[Neostarwcc]

A little bit of advertising can go a long way. Even on social pages. Lots of people need a Geek Squad rescue. I know I do. I have been trying for HOURS to get set up a new modern. Right now I can not find the button on my router to push to get my wifi extender to work. I would be glad to pay someone to help me get this stuff straightened out.

Also if someone could figure out Amazon, I have a lot of stuff I could sell on there. But I do not have the time to figure out how it works. Also, you could sell stuff on Ebay for people to make a bit of money. Right now I have a bunch of track balls I need to get rid of. Some of them new unopened in the box.

There are lots and lots and lots of ways you could be making money and generating income.

Definitely! And then there are nerds like me who to save money would buy computer parts refurbished. I could buy broken parts on Ebay fix them and sell them.

I would help you with your problem for free if I knew anything about networking. But sadly, networking is the subject that I flunked out of college on. I know what you're talking about but idk how to fix it. Hopefully you have a computer repair store near you that can fix it for you cheap. I live in such a small town that we virtually have nothing. We're really lucky that they built the Walmart here like 15 years ago. Not only did it give my wife a job but it's literally the only store in town to shop at right now.

 

[Diamond7]

I would help you with your problem for free if I knew anything about networking.

My son is a computer engineer working for Pfizer right now on a computer network. It is difficult to get him to help me because he is so busy with what he is doing and it takes time to figure out how to get things to work.

Half of his class flunked out in college. Even I 50 years ago half the people did not make it in those classes.

You could go on your community Facebook page and tell people what you can do and offer your services for a very reasonable price.

 

[turkle]

It seems unreasonable that she works all day while you play games, and then she starts dinner as soon as she gets home. Why not make dinner yourself? If you don't know how, there's dozens of websites that can help you. It would be a very loving thing to do to allow her to come home to a home cooked meal.

I can't imagine watching TV and playing video games all day. No wonder you're bored...that is simply mind numbing. Instead, learn something new, read lots of books and get out and exercise. Take a walk, go to the library, get some fresh air. If you can take a class, then by all means do so. You need something productive to do, even if you can't work a regular job.

 

[anetazo]

Able body people have to work for living. Disabled people get help from the government.
Marriage is wonderful thing. I don't know if God has anything to do with this.

If Jesus is involved?? Mabey because your supposed to be producing fruit for God, read John chapter 15. Your not Produtive. A servant of God should be planting seeds for God. Understand this. Thiers lost souls headed for hell. Jesus needs servants who will study the bible and plant seeds for God.
Mabey Jesus is trying to nudge you in the right direction.
Think it over.