I'm done here

[gurneyhalleck1]

A few times I've considered leaving this subforum for various reasons, this time I plan to make good on it. I've had some posters who I consider pharisees jump down my throat recently for posting some of the trials I've been going through. I've mentioned how my priest did awful things to me, and I've brought up the deacon's corruption not only in our church but in his job. This bothered some posters. They think it's somehow defamation of character. One even went off the deep end and posted links to legal ramifications. The saddest thing is, this guy was a poster I always loved in here and respected. Ugh.

I can't take people who blindly check their brains in at the door. It takes the height of naivete to think priests can never sin, deacons can never turn a blind eye to abuse, and that the actions of clergy can ruin a family's church life. I watched all the sex molestation scandal stuff unfold in the Catholic Church, and I was sickened to see some of the apologists who would stick up for the priest at the expense of the victims. I had thought Orthodoxy was a cut above that intellectual and moral dishonesty. I still think generally it is.

I can't post where I'm going to be attacked for sharing my pain and my story and my conflicts. I consider the words of one female poster downright cruel. She almost delights in my pain.

I want to thank ArmyMatt, Antony TX, Kylissa, George95, gzt, Dorothea, Seashale76, Rusmeister, Joseph Hazen (my old friend who first introduced me to Orthodoxy so kindly), my wonderful friend Anhelyna, definitely InnerPhyre, jckstraw, All4Christ, and a host of other kind souls who have been wonderful listeners. You are in my heart and my own prayers with great thanks. You lifted me up when I needed it most.

Thanks to those kind folks for listening and caring. But there are two or three posters in here who beat me down when I need support. I can't take being beaten down right now. I can't deal with any more Pharisees.

God bless you all. Take Care.

Gurney

 

[All4Christ]

Gurney....I was so happy to have you back posting on TAW! You are one of the people that I associate with when I think of TAW. I hope that you are able to keep posting...could you perhaps put those people on your ignore list? There is a big support group for you here...we care about you!

EDIT: As Dorothea said - if you can't stay, I understand as well... you need to do what you have to do... we will just miss you! That said, I hope to see you around more, as I consider you to be a part of TAW. Take care!

 

[Dorothea]

A few times I've considered leaving this subforum for various reasons, this time I plan to make good on it. I've had some posters who I consider pharisees jump down my throat recently for posting some of the trials I've been going through. I've mentioned how my priest did awful things to me, and I've brought up the deacon's corruption not only in our church but in his job. This bothered some posters. They think it's somehow defamation of character. One even went off the deep end and posted links to legal ramifications. The saddest thing is, this guy was a poster I always loved in here and respected. Ugh.

I can't take people who blindly check their brains in at the door. It takes the height of naivete to think priests can never sin, deacons can never turn a blind eye to abuse, and that the actions of clergy can ruin a family's church life. I watched all the sex molestation scandal stuff unfold in the Catholic Church, and I was sickened to see some of the apologists who would stick up for the priest at the expense of the victims. I had thought Orthodoxy was a cut above that intellectual and moral dishonesty. I still think generally it is.

I can't post where I'm going to be attacked for sharing my pain and my story and my conflicts. I consider the words of one female poster downright cruel. She almost delights in my pain.

I want to thank ArmyMatt, Antony TX, Kylissa, George95, gzt, Dorothea, Seashale76, Rusmeister, Joseph Hazen (my old friend who first introduced me to Orthodoxy so kindly), my wonderful friend Anhelyna, definitely InnerPhyre, jckstraw, All4Christ, and a host of other kind souls who have been wonderful listeners. You are in my heart and my own prayers with great thanks. You lifted me up when I needed it most.

Thanks to those kind folks for listening and caring. But there are two or three posters in here who beat me down when I need support. I can't take being beaten down right now. I can't deal with any more Pharisees.

God bless you all. Take Care.

Gurney

Gurney,

I'm sorry to see you go, but I completely understand. I'll be keeping you and your family in my prayers as I have been. Take care, my friend. God be with you.

 

[Anhelyna]

Gurney - possibly I shouldn't comment at this point

BUT


I will.

In a way I've been in a somewhat similar situation , and I DO understand how it leaves you totally bewildered , hurt and wondering how to escape from it all.

Eventually the hurt lessens a bit , but it never goes away completely. You will always wonder how the situation could have arisen in the first place and you will never get to the bottom of it.

You need time - to start healing , to start accepting the things you can't change , and to decide how to move forward for your spiritual health and well being - and that of your family.

God be with you my friend

 

[buzuxi02]

Stick around! Don't go it will get boring here without you. Maybe theres a good heated political topic we can start to keep you around. Well pop in once in awhile, you have my prayers and support.

 

[Jesus4Madrid]

A few times I've considered leaving this subforum for various reasons, this time I plan to make good on it. I've had some posters who I consider pharisees jump down my throat recently for posting some of the trials I've been going through. I've mentioned how my priest did awful things to me, and I've brought up the deacon's corruption not only in our church but in his job. This bothered some posters. They think it's somehow defamation of character. One even went off the deep end and posted links to legal ramifications. The saddest thing is, this guy was a poster I always loved in here and respected. Ugh.

I can't take people who blindly check their brains in at the door. It takes the height of naivete to think priests can never sin, deacons can never turn a blind eye to abuse, and that the actions of clergy can ruin a family's church life. I watched all the sex molestation scandal stuff unfold in the Catholic Church, and I was sickened to see some of the apologists who would stick up for the priest at the expense of the victims. I had thought Orthodoxy was a cut above that intellectual and moral dishonesty. I still think generally it is.

I can't post where I'm going to be attacked for sharing my pain and my story and my conflicts. I consider the words of one female poster downright cruel. She almost delights in my pain.

I want to thank ArmyMatt, Antony TX, Kylissa, George95, gzt, Dorothea, Seashale76, Rusmeister, Joseph Hazen (my old friend who first introduced me to Orthodoxy so kindly), my wonderful friend Anhelyna, definitely InnerPhyre, jckstraw, All4Christ, and a host of other kind souls who have been wonderful listeners. You are in my heart and my own prayers with great thanks. You lifted me up when I needed it most.

Thanks to those kind folks for listening and caring. But there are two or three posters in here who beat me down when I need support. I can't take being beaten down right now. I can't deal with any more Pharisees.

God bless you all. Take Care.

Gurney

Gurney,

That is too bad, since you are one of the posters I most admire and respect here. I find I generally agree with almost everything you say (except for my profound disagreement with your music tastes). I will miss you.

That said, I think there is a fine line between seeking help to lift yourself up and seeking support to put another down. I haven't seen the recent posts, but just because one does not want to join in a very public fulmination against your former priest does not make her a Pharisee or suggest that she is an apologist for your priest. Can you see this?

I personally think this fine line was crossed in the past and I felt complicit in gossip. Maybe that wasn't your intention. If you really think what your priest did was akin to sexual molestation, you should take it up with your Bishop, not an Internet forum.

I wish you very well and pray God would heal you from this deep wound.

 

[Tigger45]

Gurney TAW is one of the best forums here at CF and frankly the Internet as well. No place is perfect this side of heaven even our church congregations can do us wrong at times as you well know. I know the Lord uses our rough edges that we tend to inflict injury on one another just as a by product of our lives intersecting with each other's as chances to grow in our Christ like images. I like people who speak their minds 'as long as it's balanced, fair and there is room for reconciliation' bc then I know who I'm really dealing with.

If you need to put some people on ignore bc your wounds are still to fresh to hear things about it that you feel are out right incorrect then I would suggest that you would be better off doing that then throwing the baby out with the bath water.

Praying for the best for you and your family.

 

[Anhelyna]

Gurney TAW is one of the best forums here at CF and frankly the Internet as well. No place is perfect this side of heaven even our church congregations can do us wrong at times as you well know............

If you need to put some people on ignore bc your wounds are still to fresh to hear things about it that you feel are out right incorrect then I would suggest that you would be better off doing that then throwing the baby out with the bath water.

Praying for the best for you and your family.

There's a lot of really good commonsense stuff in there

 

[xenia]

She almost delights in my pain.<<<

Do you all really believe this? After all the years I have been on TAW, do you people really believe I delight is someone's pain?

The rebuke of a friend is more valuable than flattery.

 

[RobNJ]

She almost delights in my pain.<<<

Do you all really believe this? After all the years I have been on TAW, do you people really believe I delight is someone's pain?

The rebuke of a friend is more valuable than flattery.

Not at ALL

 

[ArmyMatt]

I think you can see that folks on here don't want you to go man. I certainly don't. I agree with putting some folks on an ignore list, or taking some time off, but I do hope you come back.

many prayers for you, brother. hang in there, find a new Orthodox Church, and let off some steam. it does get better, and the trial is always worth the grace in the end.

 

[xenia]

Oh, nevermind.

Who cares.

 

[~Anastasia~]

Hey Gurney - I have to agree with the consensus here that we hope you don't go. Although I understand you've been in some rough places, and you need to do what's best for yourself. I'd miss you though. Please do know that either way you have my prayers!

And I'm not done talking about middle-schoolers! I'm actually developing a fondness for them in some of the better schools! Attitude, hormones, and all! . But your advice has been invaluable as I consider returning to full-time. Maybe. Just as your advice has been very helpful to me spiritually at times.

At any rate, if you decide to take a hiatus, I hope you'll be back. And there's always the possibility of "ignore" if you must. Though sometimes I'm very grateful for those persons in my life who frustrate me the most, as they can be the source of great growth - when we are ready.

Don't take that as criticism, but hopefully encouragement. You do have my prayers - probably permanently, lol. And I hope you stay in touch somehow. God bless you and your family!

 

[rusmeister]

Do whatever you must.
I consider you my friend; I am still amazed at our initial mutual confrontations that turned into mutual understanding!
I'm on FB, e-mail at yahoo (ask for me by name!), and at expat.ru

FWIW, I left and came back, though much warier now.

Go with God!
Rus

 

[E.C.]

Do what you gotta do. I'm more saddened at the fact that a few perfectly grown adults could not hash their issues out in private, but what do I know? I'm just a 25 year-old single sailor.

 

[Isaac32]

Sad to see you go, especially because I just got back, but I wish you well. It might be for the best. I often question what good participation in forums like these does for someone like me, who is so prone to conflict and frustration.

 

[Kristos]

peace be with you.

 

[Mariya116]

Bye Gurney! It was fun reading your posts. Hope your family is well.