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I'm at my wits ends, really want to believe that there's a God, but the facts are simply overwhelmin

Discussion in 'Anxiety, Panic & Agoraphobia' started by LostSoulz12, Dec 26, 2016.

  1. LostSoulz12

    LostSoulz12 New Member

    4
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    Atheist
    Single
    Hello everyone. I'm an Atheist who have been recently going to church, perhaps in a desperate attempt to seek resolution and help for my terrible depression and anxiety. I had always have conflicts within myself and others, i didn't quite fit in. Even though it didn't seem logical, i was so depressed that i was willing to try anything to stop my misery. I'm 20, always the awkward guy, never had a girlfriend. I always fear offending people and getting killed, poisoned and harmed in numerous ways. It's very unsettling for me and therapies honestly didn't help me very much.

    Why do would God be awesome?

    Firstly, knowing that there's a God out there looking out for you and putting your life on his hands reassures you much more than you could think. For someone with severe paranoia and anxiety like me it really helps. You would think that your existence is part of a greater purpose and that your life is destined, worrying about it will not change things.

    After going to Church for the past month, I'm honestly astonished by how much faith people have in their God. It's mind-blowing how they could believe with such devotion. The people there are really friendly, despite me being an depressed anxious guy, being the guy always hated in school, work etc. It was one of the first times i felt welcomed. The people there were very warm and welcoming to be despite me saying that me saying that I'm an atheist, and they told me they would look out and pray for me. I really like the community there, tried really hard for the past few weeks to accept Jesus but it was impossible for such a skeptical person like me to accept him. I mean, why would he put me, and others in this world to suffer in agony, only to find him and be saved then? Regardless, even though I didn't really talk much to people there, i still got invited to their gatherings and events. I felt accepted(somewhat?).

    However, my anxiety is getting worse, i keep fearing for my life every time i had an argument with anyone, worrying that they would come after me and do harm towards me. It's terrible. I feel so suicidal...What should i do...??? Accepting that God don't exist has made my depression far worse. It's like there's no light at the end of the tunnel. How do you people stay happy...? I'm having an existential crisis being the worthless person I'm. I don't know how to continue living... Virgin, an idiot and 5'5. I really shouldn't exist at all. I need some advice on what to do... Sorry for the long post... Thanks for reading, happy holidays!
     
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  2. Larnievc

    Larnievc Well-Known Member

    +2,293
    Atheist
    Married
    UK-Labour
    It sounds as if you a describing Generalised Anxiety Disorder.

    Basically that means you spend a significant amount of time engaged in pathological worry.

    I myself used to be crippled by worry: my health, my future, what people thought of me; big worries like catching HIV to whether people thought I was a [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse].

    Then I got access to Cognitive Behvioural Therapy and it's now controlled so well I live a completely normal life.

    Get some CBT. It will change your life.

    All the best.
     
  3. archer75

    archer75 Well-Known Member Supporter

    +3,319
    United States
    Eastern Orthodox
    Married
    I fully agree with @Larnievc in that you should seek direct help for your crippling anxiety. And I sincerely believe that although it feels unfixable...that feeling may not accurately reflect reality.

    I can say from my own experience that going to church can be really helpful. I would encourage you to keep it up. Also suggest prayer. A couple times a day -- morning and evening. Just tell God your concerns and what you are glad about, even if you can hardly find anything. I'm not saying if you do this all your problems will magically vanish. But I have been helped by practices like that.
     
  4. LostSoulz12

    LostSoulz12 New Member

    4
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    Atheist
    Single
    Thanks guys, appreciate your insights!
     
  5. Kenny'sID

    Kenny'sID Well-Known Member Supporter

    +4,883
    Christian
    Single
    You say you have gotten help before and it did little good...have you tried CBT? If not, I would definitely do that, but either way, knowing this is NOT all for naught, there is a God, and we really can live happily forever, has a way of changing our outlook on so many things, so I would certainly recommend becoming a Christian as well.

    What facts from the title of your post, do you consider overwhelming?
     
  6. LostSoulz12

    LostSoulz12 New Member

    4
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    Atheist
    Single
    Hey man, thanks for the reply! Well, I've been raised as a Buddhist before becoming an atheist. However being an atheist did not made me happier, in fact, i felt angrier and depressed more often than not, knowing that there's no resolution for me and everything was just up to luck. For my case, I'm a really skeptical person. I find it incredibly hard to believe something unless it has been proven with facts. Overwhelming evidence given by atheists against God's existence really made it hard for me to accept him. Why would he make certain people suffer so much in life, while giving others happiness from birth. That doesn't make any sense for a benevolent being. If he's all powerful why don't he make Earth a paradise for people? There's no hard evidence that proves his existence either, they all require faith. How could one simply have faith in something one doesn't believe exist? However I'm really holding a glimmer of hope that a God does indeed exist and would make life meaningful for us all... I really wish that is true...
     
  7. archer75

    archer75 Well-Known Member Supporter

    +3,319
    United States
    Eastern Orthodox
    Married
    Hey @LostSoulz12, just a couple brief comments (hope I am not intruding by continuing to reply).

    - I don't think there is or will ever be proof for or against God's existence because this is not the sort of thing (in my opinion) that is subject to proof. I think the arguments offered as proof FOR God's existence are barking up the wrong tree as surely as the ones against his existence are doing the same.

    - For my own usage of words, I don't use "belief" or "faith" regarding something that can be proven as fact. You may not dig this approach, but I'm offering it just in case it's useful to you: use your reason for everything appropriate, but at least consider that some things are somewhat out of the realm of reason and some things may be almost completely outside of it.

    -The world is a rough place, that is so. However, this does not prove anything, it more suggests that people (who have enormous practical power in the world) have been doing a very bad job at running things and managing resources.

    Hope this wasn't useless to you.
     
  8. Kenny'sID

    Kenny'sID Well-Known Member Supporter

    +4,883
    Christian
    Single
    OK, fair enough, the usual reasons.

    First, I'd consider the fact that Atheists are obviously against God. Some because they believed other Atheists arguments, and others because they simply want to do as thy wish, or not live within Gods standards, so they explain God away. IOW, they have a huge agenda. I'm sure there are other reason there are Atheists, but I'll leave it at that.

    As far as the suffering...we bring a lot of that on ourselves, and I do understand some of it just doesn't seem fair....to us. To a point anyway, I look at it as being brought up in a normal family atmosphere...we don't like some of the things our parents did, even though it was all for our benefit (all depending on the parents). When we were a child it was a time of learning...if we listened, we did well, if we did not, sometimes we didn't do so well.

    So take that, and move it to the big picture of God doing the same thing, but he can be more tough, as well as more loving. It's all a process to see if we can hack the life God has set up for eternity, or not. At least those are the basics anyway, and may explains some things to you.

    As for proof against God, as in evolution and such...don't get me started. :)

    But I will say, for me anyway, if I go all the way back to the beginning of the arguments, dump all the confusion, and look at the basics brought forth by both sides, I see one side saying they have no idea how it started or it started from nothing and for no particular reason, or that they don't know how it started. Then the other side saying it was created by God. Then, as I've said often here, I have to conclude, I've seen things created, yet nothing ever just happen completely on it's own.

    It's all the created confusion, flat out lies or unproven "theory" that we have to do away with first, as it can be overwhelming otherwise. There is scripture...Satan is the master of confusion. and that has never been more evident than when it comes to to this particular subject. They will swear it's not, but evolution's main purpose is to get God out of the picture by rendering him unnecessary, so of course so-called evolution goes against a creator. We even have so called Christians that believe whole hardheartedly in evolution, I mean talk about things that can easily confuse some of us, that would be just one. Anyway, you see my point about getting past that first, then gathering your thoughts, and going about things with logic/good sense, and reason...that can make all the difference.

    So with that, I start from a good logical basis, at least as I see it, then move to looking into evolution, only to find that in the end, and though they try very hard to make us believe otherwise, it's all just opinions that they like to confuse us to believe is science, when it is not. It is things they assume are what real science is telling them, and they often assume according to their agenda (you know, like people tend to do a lot in any area) Science says what it does, and theirs is an opinion, an opinion drawn from true science, and often with agenda to prove God isn't there.

    I'd also like to add...as in many areas, people want others to go along with their agenda, especially if it is wrong/made up, as it makes that agenda much easier to justify if they can convince others.

    You get into the Bible enough, and you see these things are predicted, and especially what is happening these days in pulling people away from God. But in the end, I think God wants us all to take a close look, yet he allows us the free will to decide for ourselves if we want to accept what he has for us or not. Just seems like good logical sense to accept it to me. :)

    I tried to keep it short, and hope that helps some, but whether it did or not, I strongly suggest you keep looking into it. The scripture of "Seek and ye shall find" really does provide answers.

    Oh, and you're welcome, happy to reply. :)
     
  9. kodadog1024

    kodadog1024 Well-Known Member

    535
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    Christian
    Married
    You have to remember the suffering that He let His very own son endure. Why would He do that? If He let his own son go through these trials and harsh tribulations, what would make us think He would spare us from the same? Earth "was" once Paradise, until we (all of us) fell short of the Glory of God and sinned against Him. I personally think that if I were to even "audibly" hear God's voice or see Him (which is impossible right now) I probably would STILL question myself. I mean, look at Peter, watching Christ walk across water! And he walked with him for years and yet he still disbelieved He was the Christ. Here is my suggestion, start slow. Maybe with the book of John. I think the best piece of advice I can give you as a follower of Jesus, is that you are building a "friendship", NOT a religion with Him. It's not about obeying a set of rules and regulations. He wants your friendship, and HONEST friendship and even more importantly, your love. He's paid the price for you and me. That's a done deal. We don't have to work hard for it anymore. His yolk is easy and His burden is "light". Watch this very, very carefully. //

    THIS is what Christ is about, for you, me, EVERYONE. He didn't come to condemn the world, BUT to save it. He loves you. He only wants you, nothing more.
     
  10. No.5

    No.5 New Member

    14
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    Methodist
    Single
    Hi LostSoulz12,

    We actually need faith (trust) for all sorts of things. Science can't be done if people do not have faith in the intelligibility of the universe to begin with. When we get on a plane, we have faith it will take us to our destination safely even though that isn't a certainty. If there is sufficient evidence for something, then it is worth trusting. I recommend listening to talks given by people like Prof. John Lennox, Dr. Ravi Zacharias, Dr. William Lane Craig, etc.
     
  11. carrwinn

    carrwinn New Member

    41
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    Christian
    Private
    Jehovah is eternal and He always will be with regard to his purposes. Romans 1:20 says," For his invisible qualities are clearly seen from the world's creation onward even his eternal power and godship for they are perceived by the things made, even his eternal power and Godship, so that they are inexcusable." The Universe and the planets and earth function based on laws, our bodies, and the animals have seeming laws and regulations as well that cause things to function harmoniously.
    The fact that all these things exist- let alone one thing- is evidence of a creator vs an unthinking unintelligent impersonal force or chance.
    Humans unlike animals are further designed to marvel and think about these things and to discover the way and means by which living things and no living operate.
    As the book of Genesis testifies, God Jehovah is the creator and He has made man in his image.



     
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