I still feel empty

[Tammy]

Despite being a very successful pastor for over 20 years, with a big car, a big home and having planted churches in so many villages, I don 't feel that everything is right.

I regret that I never went to a bible school. Now when I teach others, I sometimes wish that I had training. I had attended a bible school, but dropped out because I was already a pastor at the time and I didn't like other teachers correcting me.

I also feel fake sometimes. I never admit my weaknesses to my congregation, but sometimes I feel that people may discover what I really am inside. I confess that I am often very arrogant and boastful and I don't like it when my congregation talks to me like I'm an equal. I also recognize that I'm too money-minded. I wish I knew what my congregation thought about me.

I realize that I need help. But where do I start?

Pst Screeny

I think you are in the wrong field of work...you should never have entered the ministry when you are focusing on how big your house & car is...a minister is there to SERVE, not be served....

I think you need to go back to basics...get a manual job, earn your living by the sweat of your brow and find God....pick up some humbleness along the way and some honesty too...and maybe a few years from now, you might be ready to be a spiritual leader again...maybe...

 

[Kyle Arn]

Exactly i agree. I also encourage you to talk to other Pastors and get there guidance.

 

[BFine]

Despite being a very successful pastor for over 20 years, with a big car, a big home and having planted churches in so many villages, I don 't feel that everything is right.

I regret that I never went to a bible school. Now when I teach others, I sometimes wish that I had training. I had attended a bible school, but dropped out because I was already a pastor at the time and I didn't like other teachers correcting me.

I also feel fake sometimes. I never admit my weaknesses to my congregation, but sometimes I feel that people may discover what I really am inside. I confess that I am often very arrogant and boastful and I don't like it when my congregation talks to me like I'm an equal. I also recognize that I'm too money-minded. I wish I knew what my congregation thought about me.

I realize that I need help. But where do I start?

Pst Screeny

*Start here: You surrendering your whole self
to the Lord and seeking to honor Him in word and deed.
Take your eyes off of: Self, the big house, the big car...none of that will bring
real happiness nor does it mean you are a success...it just shows you have
"stuff". The type of "stuff" that will not last nor will it satisfy.

Matthew 6:20-21
"Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and
rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal.
"But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth
nor rust destroys, and where thieves do not break in or steal;
for where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

Take up your cross and follow Jesus.

 

[Jupiter Drops]

Despite being a very successful pastor for over 20 years, with a big car, a big home and having planted churches in so many villages, I don 't feel that everything is right.

I regret that I never went to a bible school. Now when I teach others, I sometimes wish that I had training. I had attended a bible school, but dropped out because I was already a pastor at the time and I didn't like other teachers correcting me.

I also feel fake sometimes. I never admit my weaknesses to my congregation, but sometimes I feel that people may discover what I really am inside. I confess that I am often very arrogant and boastful and I don't like it when my congregation talks to me like I'm an equal. I also recognize that I'm too money-minded. I wish I knew what my congregation thought about me.

I realize that I need help. But where do I start?

Pst Screeny

Confess to God that you are arrogant and boastful. Confess everything that is flawed about you to God. Ask God to take out the lies that you've planted in your heart for all these years, and replace them with a new one that is Jesus centered and very humble. Can you confidently say that you can go to heaven if you die tonight? Ask Jesus to be your savior and be with you forever.


Give up the things you've always loved and follow Jesus.

 

[tturt]

Screeny, I apologize for a couple of these posts. But since you've been a pastor you know how people can be even believers.

Thanks for your honesty and hopefully someone has offered something that will be useful to you. Praying for you, too.

 

[Goodbook]

Stop serving mammon and start serving the Lord.

If you can't do that, then I suggest you quit and find another job. Maybe an actor?

Your congregation is not interested in your big car or home. You are not above them. They just want to know Jesus.

 

[znr]

Exclude mine. There's room for blunt honesty.

Screeny, I apologize for a couple of these posts. But since you've been a pastor you know how people can be even believers.

Thanks for your honesty and hopefully someone has offered something that will be useful to you. Praying for you, too.

 

[tturt]

A lot of assumptions have been made.

Some pastors are very successful authors. Some work 80+ hours a week and if they were employed outside the church, they would be making a lot more money. Sometimes their spouse also works for the church and puts in that many hours. ETC

It's like he became a target for all the frustrations that some have with pastors.

 

[znr]

Frankly Scarlett..

A lot of assumptions have been made.

Some pastors are very successful authors. Some work 80+ hours a week and if they were employed outside the church, they would be making a lot more money. Sometimes their spouse also works for the church and puts in that many hours. ETC

It's like he became a target for all the frustrations that some have with pastors.

 

[tturt]

As believers, we're not to beat him up.

James 5 says "Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much."

He's confessed his faults. So looking at the rest of the verse - Now the question is can we - The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much.

 

[Goodbook]

But this is shocking.. How can op be a pastor and not know to be filled with the Holy Spirit?! Thats why he's feeling empty..isnt it obvious? You pray and ask God to fill you and you also study the bible to show yourself approved of God. Simple.

You cant serve God and mammon, it just doesn't work that way, and if you do you'll soon be found out. Christians are people of faith, but we're not stupid.

 

[znr]

I don't believe this nonsense anymore. But I do know that the op isn't concerned over his flock so much as he's concerned with what they think about him. That's hardly a confession of faults. But whatever, this whole mess is typical of those who want to get money more than anything else.

As believers, we're not to beat him up.

James 5 says "Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much."

He's confessed his faults. So looking at the rest of the verse - Now the question is can we - The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much.

 

[Tammy]

Exclude mine. There's room for blunt honesty.

And mine, too!

 

[Tammy]

As believers, we're not to beat him up.

James 5 says "Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much."

He's confessed his faults. So looking at the rest of the verse - Now the question is can we - The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much.

I think you are giving him way too much benefit of the doubt....

 

[seeingeyes]

I think you are giving him way too much benefit of the doubt....

Why shouldn't we? Wouldn't you like to be given the benefit of the doubt? Or would you prefer to mention your troubles, seeking a solution, and get hit in the face with someone else's righteousness?

Jesus went to Zaccheus' house for dinner...

 

[paul1149]

But this is shocking.

Yes it is, but still, he came to us and was honest. Either he is a troll or he deserves a measure of respect for doing so. I chose to give him the benefit of the doubt. After all, by his own admission he has no one to confide in. If we are too rash with people who come here with a problem, no one will come here, and rightly so.

 

[aiki]

Despite being a very successful pastor for over 20 years, with a big car, a big home and having planted churches in so many villages, I don 't feel that everything is right.

I regret that I never went to a bible school. Now when I teach others, I sometimes wish that I had training. I had attended a bible school, but dropped out because I was already a pastor at the time and I didn't like other teachers correcting me.

I also feel fake sometimes. I never admit my weaknesses to my congregation, but sometimes I feel that people may discover what I really am inside. I confess that I am often very arrogant and boastful and I don't like it when my congregation talks to me like I'm an equal. I also recognize that I'm too money-minded. I wish I knew what my congregation thought about me.

I realize that I need help. But where do I start?

1Pe 5:5 Likewise, you younger, submit yourselves unto the elder. Yea, all of you be subject one to another, and be clothed with humility: for God resists the proud, and gives grace to the humble.
1Pe 5:6 Humble yourselves therefore under the mighty hand of God, that he may exalt you in due time:

Php 1:21 For to me to live is Christ, and to die is gain.

Selah.

 

[TheyCallMeDavid]

Despite being a very successful pastor for over 20 years, with a big car, a big home and having planted churches in so many villages, I don 't feel that everything is right.

I regret that I never went to a bible school. Now when I teach others, I sometimes wish that I had training. I had attended a bible school, but dropped out because I was already a pastor at the time and I didn't like other teachers correcting me.

I also feel fake sometimes. I never admit my weaknesses to my congregation, but sometimes I feel that people may discover what I really am inside. I confess that I am often very arrogant and boastful and I don't like it when my congregation talks to me like I'm an equal. I also recognize that I'm too money-minded. I wish I knew what my congregation thought about me.

I realize that I need help. But where do I start?

Pst Screeny

First ...Pastor, I appreciate your vulnerability in asking these questions in a public Forum and to admit your weaknesses. I think its time to seek out some Professional Christian Counselling from a seasoned Pastor/Counsellor who can give you many insights as well as working with you on some of your vices along with Gods power to help you be an Overcomer . I find that Pastors especially , are folks that have to be very aware of when they are moving toward a lack of humility in their Leadership role ; im sure its something that many if not all CEO's of large companys face too. As a Pastor, you have a lot of power, decision making latitude , influence over your congregation/wife/family , and I can see where a superiority complex might start to arise to where you think you don't need anyone telling you anything even if its for your personal growth as a Leader and Shepard.

As for formal education, I don't see where its too late for you to undergo this even at this stage of your career (?) . Is there any reason why you couldn't take certain essential Courses either Online , thru Books, or at a local Seminary part time while still maintaining your Church Body that God has entrusted to you ? Even if you didn't enroll in formal education, you could come up to the speed yuou want to be at by commiting yourself to studying and learning from Pastoral Associates of yours .

Finally, the downfall of all the Tele-evangelists has been pride, arrogance, and a falling away from God into worldly activities....so, let these fallen Pastors be an example of what to watch out for because Satan is hot on your trail trying to topple you big time. What id opt for immediately, is, to get into a small Pastoral Accountability Group of trusted individuals where you can pour your heart out and receive help and exhortation to stay on the right path. It will mean sacrificing your pride and ego in exchange for the power of God to chisel you back into right order again where your priorities take precedence and where your personality and character get reformed .

Hope that helped in some small way.

 

[tturt]

Yes.

posted: I think its time to seek out some Professional Christian Counselling from a seasoned Pastor/Counsellor

 

[Emmy]

Dear Screeny. I say this with love, Jesus has the right answer for you
In Matthew 22: 35-40: Jesus tells a Lawyer: " The first and great Commandment is: Love God with all thy heart, with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. The second is like it: Love they neighbour as thyself." Jesus points out to us: " On these two Commandments hang all the Law and the Prophets."
Matthew 7: 7-10: will give you all the Love you ask for: " Ask and ye shall receive." Then thank God and share it all with all around you. Love all you know and all you meet, love them freely with No tags attached. That is what God wants from you, Screeny: " A Pastor Loving and looking after his sheep,
his Congregation." Love is very catching, and soon you will have the people treating you as you treat the people. You will also find that you are gradually
changing into a Pastor who loves his flock, and who is loved by his flock.
Keep asking for Love and keep sharing this Love, then thank God and enjoy being a Pastor. Greetings from Emmy, your sister in Christ.