I need advice ASAP

[servant4ever]

My parents forced me to change my major to business last year. This is the first full semester I hvae been a business major. I've been taking 5 business courses this semester. I am totally confused in 3 and I've read all the books, I attend class, I've done the homework, and all that. My heart is still set on majoring in Bible. My parents told me they will take away my financial help if I change my major, especially if it's a "worthless major like Bible." My parents are Christians. What do I do???

servant4ever

 

[dasielady]

Have you considered a double major? Or perhaps a major and a minor? Then you could do both. In the case of your current business courses, I advise you to go see a guidance counselor/academic advisor. It will ruin your GPA and you will be throwing away a semester's worth of tuition if you stay in a full load of classes that you don't understand. (I am a business major, and had this problem sort-of myself at one time. I lost 3 semesters of school because I had my head in my tush.) (Not saying that you have your head in your tush..... just that I understand the concequences of what can happen).

You don't want to disobey your mother and father.
On the other hand, if they are not going to help you with school, and in turn they agree to not claim you as a dependant on thier tax returns, then you can get them to sign a statement for the financial aid office that they are withdrawing thier help, and usually after pestering financial aid, you can get authorized to be considered an independant student.... which would make you ellibible for aid, and then you could pursue what you want to pursue without offending your parents ,,, possibly.

But I would first try to negotiate with them, and maybe do a double major.

Good luck.

 

[servant4ever]

I don't have time to do double major. I would be failing 3 of the 6 business minor courses, so that would be useless. I have talked to all my profs about me being really confused and I'm seeing one of my profs for the 4th time in 2 weeks over this stuff. I seriously do NOT care if the assets and liabilities are equal. Who even looks at this stuff.

 

[allieisme]

How come they MADE you change your major?

 

[MooCow]

First off, your parents can't MAKE you do anything.

The first thing to try in that situation is the, "I'll just go live on the street" argument. Act like you're serious...even go so far as to start packing your bags in your room. Parents will typically crumble under that sort of pressure.

Secondly, dangit, your parents can't MAKE you do anything! I hate parents like that....grrr...

 

[bliz]

Several things to consider...

Becoming finacially independent from your parents is not a matter of pestering a financial aid director. This is a federal matter and colleges have to answer to the feds about what they do with federal money. Generally, you will be considered dependent upon your parents for help with college until age 25.

As for pretending to go live on the streets... well, be careful - they may take you up on it! Emotional blackmail is unattractive and wrong no matter is it's done by parents or children.

While I don't necessarilly apporove of parents forcing the hand of their child to take a particular major (usually it does not end well) if they are paying for your education, they certainly have a right to have a voice in what you study! Parents are not required to pay for a college education for their children in the first place.

I have worked at a christian college and for Christian higher educatin for a great del of my life, and I am no big fan of Bible majors. If one is serious about going into ministry, in my opinion, one needs graduate level studies at a seminary after college anyway, and you can do that with a degree in anything.

If you have a good enough brain to wrap itself around Greek and Hebrew, you can master Business courses. You clearly do not want to, but that's a different matter. Children often like to show their parents that they "can't" do something they are expected to do - usually it's picking up their toys, but sometimes children continue to try and make that point when they are much older. This is a very expensive point to make!!!

Frankly, if you were my kid and you flunked business classes, I'd say "Clearly you are not cut out for college studies. Drop out and get a job." I don't wish to offend any business folk, but undergrad business level courses are not rocket surgery. Yes, business can become much more complex, but not at the undergrad level.

if you want to serve God, then be well prepared to do so. If you want to manage a ministry, or serve on a church board or be a board member at a Christian school,. you had better care about assets and libalities! What's the matter with good stewardship of money? A friend of mine works in missions in Hati. When they would get someone new on the field they would get basic iinformation on them in advance, and they would always pray "Oh, please God! Don't send us a Bible major!" Bible majors tended to not know how to do anything, and they tended to disdain learning about all the real business of keeping a ministry up and running. Almost everyone I know is ministry says the same thing.

If you really can't make a go of it, then I suggest that you switch to a community college where you could probably afford the tuition on a part-time job. Or drop out for a year and work and both you and your parents can re-think your positions.

 

[servant4ever]

A. I am maxed out on loans, so I have to take their financial help to go to school.

B. I am totally lost in my classes and my heart keeps telling me to go back to the Bible major.

C. I am going to seminary directly after college.

D. I am so frustrated with my classes I end up breaking down crying every night.

E. People are gifted with different gifts.

F. I probably do NOT have a gift with business type of stuff.

G. I have aced all my Bible classes I have taken so far.

H. All my Bible professors have told me I would be a great pastor.

servant4ever

 

[fishstix]

A. I am maxed out on loans, so I have to take their financial help to go to school.

If you're studying something that you don't want, then why bother being in school at all? Drop out and get a job. Then after you earn enough you can pay to study what *you* want to study.

B. I am totally lost in my classes and my heart keeps telling me to go back to the Bible major.

Then the logical thing to do would be to take steps towards that. If your parents won't pay for it, you'll have to yourself. That's likely going to mean getting a job.

C. I am going to seminary directly after college.

Are your parents going to pay for that seeing as they won't pay for the major you want now? Again, you may need to get a job so you can fund that yourself.

D. I am so frustrated with my classes I end up breaking down crying every night.

I think a lot of students actually have that experience... I've seen people break down crying right in a lecture theater - not just in first year either... Expecially during midterms and finals...

E. People are gifted with different gifts.

Yes. Good point.

F. I probably do NOT have a gift with business type of stuff.

Then why bother going to business school? Like I said before, there's no point in being there at all if you aren't going to use it.

G. I have aced all my Bible classes I have taken so far.

Good for you That's cool.

H. All my Bible professors have told me I would be a great pastor.

Also cool. So if that's your goal, what are you going to do towards achieving it? You're an adult - you're parents can't make your decisions forever.

 

[JillLars]

I would pretty much have to agree with what everyone else is saying. Your parents shouldn't choose your major for you, you will be the one getting a job when you're done with college, and if its something you don't want to do, then you shouldn't have to.

My suggestion: Get a job, and get a place of your own. It doesn't have to be a big theatrical blowout with your parents. Just tell them you would like to become independent from them, and then do it. My suggestion: Find a job where you can study. I worked overnights as a security guard for my first 2.5 years of college. It paid the bills (including my first 2 years of tuition), and I was able to study all night long and then go to class in the morning or in the evenings. Just a thought. It is good to obey your parents, but this is a decision that will govern a large portion of your life, and you need to take steps to gain control over your own future.

 

[servant4ever]

Here's another thing. I'm disabled and I won't be able to do physical type of jobs. Being a security guard or something like that won't be good for me as I can't chase down people if I need to do so. I do work for the campus switchboard as a work study, but I only get $100-150 a every 2 weeks.

servant4ever

 

[JohnnyV]

First off, your parents can't MAKE you do anything.

The first thing to try in that situation is the, "I'll just go live on the street" argument. Act like you're serious...even go so far as to start packing your bags in your room. Parents will typically crumble under that sort of pressure.

Secondly, dangit, your parents can't MAKE you do anything! I hate parents like that....grrr...

I totally disagree on that note. The poster is 20, any right-minded parent would say "need help packin". Parents may 'crumble' at this kind of stuff for 12 year olds, but not for anyone over 16, especially a 20 year old.

I would suggest, for the poster, to drop one or two classes and pick them up next semester. That way you can focus on the other courses and maybe bring the grades up. You are in college for a reason, thats to learn. You can not learn if you are completely stressed out.
Dropping a class now and then is not a bad thing. You dont fail the class and can re-take it at a later time.
Depending on the Governmental aid you are getting, that could mean some cash back too.
Getting a degree in business isnt a bad thing, even if you do want to go on to be a pastor. I think a pastor should know the workings of business, keep them out of a lot of trouble with finances and running the church.
Good luck and hang in there. I agree that it is hard , but you can do all things through Christ!!

 

[JVD]

I was a Bible Major when I went to college at 18. After graduating I worked as a youth pastor at a church for a few years and realized that I didn't really want to be in full-time ministry ( I won't go into the reasons but I believe tent-making ministries are more biblical).

Anyhow...I realized I had no training for anything else. I agree with the other poster who said Bible Majors are not as useful in real life. What would you do with your Bible major. You can study the bible on your own and you have your whole life to do it. In fact I found the Bible major seemed to take a little of personal discovery away from my own bible study.

Later...when I was 27 I went back for FOUR MORE YEARS and got a degree in education. Very little of my Bible major was transferrable.

If you aren't interested in business...what other career goal do you have? Are you a math whiz? What about engineering? Not into that? How about counseling?

I would talk sensibly to my parents about other possibilities but I would not push them to have you do the Bible Major...They are wiser than you think!

 

[AlanBoB]

I would agree with JVD, talk to your parents. If you truly beleive that you should be studying something else and think the facts lead towards that then present it to them, but do it professionally and respectably. If you gather real and accurate information as a persuasive argument then they probably will respect your decision more. Show them you have put a lot of thought into it, maybe even get some of your prof's to sign a recommendation towards that step. If they see real reasons you should be doing that then they probably will consider it.

If you cannot get enough facts and re-affirmation to back it up, then maybe you should consider their argument.


As others are saying they are paying your way so you must respect their input. If you want to totally disregard their input then as fishstix said, pay your own way *shrug*, don't mean to be harsh but that is the reality of it.

Right now I'm working on my second degree, full time student, work about 30 hours a week in an every day job, about 20 hours a week freelance... and 10-20 hours on a personal venture with classmates... not including homework, along with personal study time... its hard, really really hard, but you gotta do what you gotta do... remember always turn to the Lord, when your too weak to make it, its a reminder of how much you Need the Lord. We all get reminded of that, lol I need the reminder waaaay too often.

Best of luck

 

[servant4ever]

Hello,

Please pray for me now... I did talk to one of my 3 profs and I'm still confused. I ended up emailing my mom and telling her I'm lost in 3 of my 5 classes. I just hope they won't be too upset.

servant4ever

 

[dasielady]

Several things to consider...

Becoming finacially independent from your parents is not a matter of pestering a financial aid director. This is a federal matter and colleges have to answer to the feds about what they do with federal money. Generally, you will be considered dependent upon your parents for help with college until age 25.

I just wanted to clarify that I well,.,,, should have clarified to begin with. I realize that a financial aid director does not make the decision per se, as to whether or not a person is considered financially independant. However, a a fianacial aid director is the person that would see a financial aid appeal, and that person is very useful in advising when a student is petitioning the government (FAFSA people) to reconsider them as an independant student.

One would have to show a thier parents latest tax returns do not claim the student as a dependant, and they would have to have a signed and sworn statement from the parents that they are not giving any aid to the student, and the student has to show proof of income for self support.

I guess basically I was just adding the idea as a last ditch effort to get financial aid if this student is forced to become independant.

But, the case seems here, now that I know more, that this would not be much of an option for this student,,, so never mind!


To the Student:
I am beginning to agree with everyone else here in that you should drop out and get a job for a while, or attend a community college. You must be in an accounting class? It is important for to know the basic accounting equation of "assetts=liabilities-stockholder's equity" because this helps you figure out if you have enough money to pay your debts, how many debts you have, what your "net worth" is, and the list goes on. If you ever need to submit a proposal for a grant for your church, or if you ever want to work on expanding the church budget to incorporate a new youth group, you will have to understand this type of stuff.

If you want to get into ministry, the other posters here are right... you will need to know SOMETHING else in addition to biblical history and philosophy. Especially if you ever hope to have your own congregation.

Is it too late to drop some of your classes? Perhaps if you were only taking 3 classes right now, 2 that you understand and one that you need help with,.... the it would be easier to handel the load right now... or what if you got a tutor?

Otherwise, there is no point in you staying in the program.

Good luck.

 

[Serapha]

Hi there!





You really are looking at this in a very negative way. If God opened the door for you with financial aid to go to college, then why not make the most of it?


God hasn't opened the door for you for Bible studies right now... and perhaps the business major is God's way to lead you into a job where you may continue your education in Bible. There's an abundance of on-line courses that you could use to study the Bible as you work towards a degree that will support you in life.


BTW... I've done the accounting route... the economics route... the government route... that was all to support a family and send kids to college.

Now... I'm on the Bible studies route to work in archaeology. There's not much money in archaeology, so all the years of accounting, economics, and government training will pay for itself in being able to work in archaeology in a year or two.. .







Education doesn't start and end with fours years of college.... learning is a life-long venture.


Go back to God with a sincere heart and ask God where HE wants you to be right now... and ask God to give you the grace to face accounting... and no ultimatums with God... be willing to listen and learn from God instead of seeking what you want to do.


BTW... God's timing may not be the same as you think the timing should be...


Let me get off my pulpit.

~serapha~

 

[Serapha]

.




If you have a good enough brain to wrap itself around Greek and Hebrew, you can master Business courses.

Hi there!




Agreed... learning accounting is much easier than four years of an ancient language.... and any "good" Bible college does require Greek and/or Hebrew and/or Latin and/or Aramaic or some type combination.


~serapha~

 

[servant4ever]

Actually, I do know some Greek. Do you think it could POSSIBLY be that God wired me for Bible and Greek and not wired me for the business stuff? Anyways, I'm thinking of doing an individualized major, like a mixture of management, communication and Bible. I really like the Human Resources stuff and I really like Communication along with the Bible...

servant4ever

 

[EbonNelumbo]

Serapha, I think your comments are very unhelpful. Being optimistic 100% of the time becomes a great pain in the rear. People should be able to post here and NOT be told to make the best of their situation, I mean if this man does NOT want to major in business, then perhaps God is telling him not to eh? I think it is highly possible that satan made the situation to destroy sevant4ever and instead he is trying his hardest to make it work. I think he needs our prayer, not us telling him to be thankful for what he has...

 

[TheMainException]

Do what YOU want...never do what your PARENTS want. Your life is about YOU and YOUR LORD. Remember that and don't let your parents shove you around. Take to heart what they say and consider it, but if you are led towards Bible...then for all means, go for it!