I messed up big time

[troubled heart]

I know that my husband wants nothing to do with me now, and it's killing me inside. I went out during the weekend and got drunk, I wanted the pain to just go away. I met up with a guy and we danced and it felt good being held. I am struggling with the rejection from my husband and am angry that he does not want to work things out. I was feeling strong and in control for a while but now am feeling hopeless, and lonely. I feel unwanted and ugly.
For seven years I allowed my husband to walk all over me and I recieved no respect from him. I acted stupid and out of controll this weekend and did not respect myself. I feel bad because I promised God that I would become a new person and a true believer of Him. But yet continue to do my will and not His. Am I just a hopeless case or what?

 

[Blessed2003]

John 14:1
"Let not your heart be troubled: Believe in God, believe also in Me. (2) In my Father's house are many dwellling places; if it were not so, I would have told you; for I go to prepare a place for you, (3) And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again, and receive you to Myself; that where I am, there you may be also. (4) And you know the way where I am going."

You are going through a really hard time right now, but don't get discouraged, God promised to NEVER leave you, or forsake you. I recommend that you do NOT go out and get drunk anymore, you are only covering up with a temporary solution, no man you meet out there will be good for you. Your not hopeless, and your no worse then the rest of us, welcome to the human race, (no sarcasm intended) you just try to do what's right, for all, not just for yourself, and put off temporrary satisfaction while giving this to God, and let Him fix what has been broken, put your Trust in Him, He alone is worthy. I prayed for you, and I know God causes all things to work together for the good, for those who Love Him.
Be Blessed
B

 

[tonya]

I tend to agree with Blessed2003....ok...you made a mistake..ask for frogiveness and shake it off and stay away from tempting places like bars and parties and alcohol..they only magnify the problem...be by yourself or with close true friends and immerse yourself in the Bible and church!!!!

 

[Mr.Cheese]

You're not a hopeless case. You're just human.
Your pattern of behavior is something you definitely need to correct though.
But that's the story of all of our lives.

 

[bliz]

Are you seeing a counselor or therapist? I think that you would find it very helpful right now. Seek out a pastor who is trained in counseling or a mature woman in your church who you respect. You can do little to change the circumstances in which you find yourself. But you can change the way you react to these events. As you know, how you reacted last weekend only made you feel worse. GEtting some counseling and a better understanding of what's going on ind\side you can help you make better, wiser, choices in the future.

 

[troubled heart]

I am seeing a counselor, but continue to struggle with the thoughts of my husband leaving me. A friend of mine, saw my husband with a women and a guy. She didn't know for sure if the women was with my husband but my thoughts are that he is with someone new. For I feel that for all these years I could never please my husband, he always found fault in me, even when I would get upset at him for staying out late and drinking, he would make me out to be the one at fault for getting upset at him.
I know that my reactions at times were not right, but I know that I didn't deserve this. I did everything for him and always stood by him when things got bad, and he never looked at the good things I tried to do for him he only focused on the things I did wrong. Now knowing that there might me someone else in his life is painful, because I was never good enough for him.