Well, I am without Him and I'm not gonna make it.
Moses went to the desert for 40 years with no sign from God ( imagine 40 years in the desert all alone, not even a sign of God and living by yourself, are you even 40 years old yet?), then God moved and we read about all that he did in Moses after that.. God is not revealing Himself to you right now, this in no way says you are not saved or if you weren't to begin with, now can't be save.. You need to rest in Him and rest in the promising scriptures rather than the doom. God can give you experiences of His presence but so can your mind and Satan can project things into your mind as well and instantly, he loves to mimic as if God. Feeling things can be great but isn't your best compass because it can be or can get contaminated. Sometimes/most of the time, it's not what you are feeling but what is spoken to you through scripture, there are real promises there. Women in particular run on emotion ( scientifically it's something like 60% for women and 40% for men how emotion effects us, that can manifest as discernment or detriment) but again this is not your best gauge. So about those promises from written word:
There are no works unto salvation, justification in fact is lack of work but a gift of grace in faith from God. Sanctification though takes some effort, some response. Justification is your ticket out of hell fwiw. It would not be in the nature of scripture or Jesus to have put a condition on you to get saved ( abandon that man and I will save you, does that really sound like Jesus Christ to you ?). It might be a condition in sanctification but not justification. Salvation is simple it's about trusting and believing in Jesus Christ and what He did at the cross for us and we personally accepting Him. Period. So I don't know who or what you were hearing from surrounding your salvation but what you were instructed is something not of Gods nature according to scripture.
Jesus died for your sins and God wishes that no one should perish. Don't condemn yourself to hell because God doesn't really want you there sweet heart !
Another promise is God is for you not against you. Also He will never leave you nor forsake you. Just because you don't sense His presence right now doesn't mean He is not there. We love to go negative.
Trust in the truths, not so much in your emotion. Just because right now you can't feel something by no means indicates He is not in your life. On the contrary, you're married now, God cherishes marriage ( satan hate a good marriage). God may be working in the background arranging blessings that will be revealed at a later date, like Moses ( hopefully you don't have to wait 40 years lol).
You need to calm down and be rational about this. I believe we live in a time of two Jesus Christs, the real one of scripture and the false one of Satan's projections and even infiltration of some churches. Read the promising scriptures and realize that God wants you in heaven not hell. Discern the spirit by proving it out and then once revealed as false cast it away with the help of the real Jesus Christ.
Finally: Seek the Lord with all your heart, mind and strength. If you can't work this out I can get you a number to get in contact with a pastor counselor. Or CF also has a chaplain you could speak with. You are too distressed to ignore this. But I don't believe God has abandoned you, He just isn't revealing himself to you right now. This is more common than Him leaving someone to the wilds of the devil . Meanwhile be careful what voices you listen to.
