I have a dislike for someone

[Radagast]

i am canadian

Yes, I had spotted the maple leaf

... which is why the miscommunication caught me by surprise -- I had thought you used the same vocabulary as us. But I guess you use U.S. vocabulary too.

 

[parsley]

Discussing this on a Christian forum puts the question into an odd context -- still, one that reminds us how our faith mixes with other parts of our lives.

Standing up for legal rights is not an act of anger, or spite, or even disrespect. It is an important step in getting things done, and holding other people to their agreements. It is assertion of rights, territory, and ethics.

Look at how Jesus spoke of love and healing, but also turned over tables of moneychangers -- those who corrupted ethics and brought impurity into God's temple area -- changing people's perception of things of God. I recently heard that "turn the other cheek" was an act of dignity and strength -- like saying you were the mature one.

You entered into a business venture, and these are constantly fraught with risks and opportunists. If you had entered the agreement naively, you would have lost turf even early. Not for the faint of heart.

Getting an attorney to write a letter is a good idea... many people want to avoid the expense, but it's like spending a week fixing your own computer instead of taking it somewhere -- you don't know that your own efforts will end up fixing the problem.

(I have three outstanding situations where people owe me money, that I let drag on too long, but is well documented.)

What Rd was saying about wording -- these days, things we don't expect can be used against us. Any references to race, religion, gender... things that could sound like threats... terms of the agreement that clashed with other laws... giving in and changing your terms.

And yes I agree that this is not a situation for court, unless she continues to gain a lot from it. Court monetizes -- she probably has not yet made money from your work.

My suggestion was to show her that you are serious, and she can expect larger consequences. Since we're not supposed to give out legal advice here, that's even one more reason to consult a lawyer.

In the context of Christianity, a person can still do business with firmness and savvy. Love does not train scammers to continue in their scamming. (Some people use a claim of Christianity to their advantage.)

 

[Radagast]

My suggestion was to show her that you are serious, and she can expect larger consequences.

And a very good suggestion it was. A letter on a lawyer's letterhead does that well.

 

[znr]

Good advice. Didn't want you to get the idea that my not replying was because I disagree.

In any business, there is a continual barrage of people trying to take advantage. So taking a calmer stance is good-- not letting the opposition bowl you over. There is an emotional win that some people enjoy, stabbing and pinching.

As for legalities, you have every right and need to pursue your property. If she takes advantage of you, she will teach that to others, and they will assume it's okay.

Small things you can do:

1. Send her a certified letter with return receipt. That provides dated evidence that you tried to contact her concerning the terms of the agreement.

2. Let her know that you plan to file copyright for each authored/created item.

3. Let her know that you may take legal action, and give her the name of an attorney. (One you know is helpful, so she doesn't call them first.)

4. Put metadata tags on any files you have. If there are a lot, get them into something like Bridge, and gang-edit them. The files will already have a date stamp on them, so make sure those aren't removed.

5. If it seems appropriate, let her know that so far you have not defamed her publicly, and would like to keep it that way. She will know there's a lot of damage that can be done, and hopefully will not play ridiculous games.

6. Let her know that you recognize it takes time to remove files, and you will give her [one month] to remove all files. If she makes any profits from the files that have not be removed, you will need the full amount of the profit within 30 days of the sale/income.

If within 30 days she has not removed the files, you will send her a bill for hourly compensation for work you have completed. (Be careful how you word this or she might just say fine, and ignore it.)

(If she plays dirty, then contact her site host and let them know she has illegal content on her site.)

I fully understand the need to forgive, but there is no company that would want their employees to bow down to a thief and give away intellectual property. It is a given that you have rights to it, and not a matter of generosity or kindness to give that up. What you worked hard for is yours. Forgive, and expect ethical behavior of others.

Some people just don't know, so educate her while you communicate your intent.

 

[parsley]

ps> i am canadian, not american.. tell me that i was spelling everything wrong.. words like colour.. and centre, or metre.. they spell that, center & meter.. and color..

Ha! I wondered where I got that from. When I was young, most of those were interchangeable, but now "center and meter" are treated as correct. I think it's the French influence in the north.

Theatre/theater.

At least you spelt "spell" normally. (-;

 

[boogalaboogala]

Ha! I wondered where I got that from. When I was young, most of those were interchangeable, but now "center and meter" are treated as correct. I think it's the French influence in the north.

Theatre/theater.

At least you spelt "spell" normally. (-;

lol..lol.. i wonder.. aren't we the ones that spell meter as metre, and the same for center.. and neighbour, and colour you speel without the "u"..
i am in the usa every week all week long for work. so i type for the most part just like you.. that is except for all of those big words you use parsley.. lol..
i was wondering if you might even be teacher, because of your words and grammar.. i mean, i have had to look up a couple of your words before getting back to one of your posts.. hahahah.. hey atleast i am honest enough to admit it..
i am pretty sure lots of people had to do the same..

 

[TheyCallMeDavid]

another believer, bordering on strong dislike, maybe hatred. This person has crossed me, used my intellectual property without my consent and has no conscience when it comes to taking my stuff - as she feels entitled. She is aware I am not okay with being used and taken advantage of. We worked for a few weeks together but that has ended. She does not have rights to use any intellectual property I've authored. No agreement was discussed which would allow her to continue using my property beyond our short partnership.

It's eating me up. I felt God tell me to chill out and that He'd handle it, but I still can't stop wanting to take legal action. She and I do not speak at all, my choice. It's a given, in my mind, that since our partnership has ended, that my stuff is mine - she needs to make her own.

This is eating me up. I feel crossed, preyed upon, dishonered. I want to file a DMCA which would force her to take down my property off the internet. I have no desire to talk with her. She has already shown me her true colors, so I don't see the point. I just want to let it go and move on...but I cannot have her hijacking my property and selling it online...and she will.

I'm at my wits end. Maybe this post doesn't make sense since it's nearly 3am, and I'm tired, but I know that the law is on my side if I need to file the neccessary forms to stop her from using my branded property. Which is not a lawsuit...its just a nudge to get another person to remove copyrighted material from the internet.

I can't seem to get past this..

Youre being eaten up over it because you wont let God have it. , totally. I was in the same boat with a person recently. We are not to retaliate when we are wronged even though its tempting.

Learn what you can from this recent experience , and let God have the final say-so in what consequences are to come this Persons way .

You are not required to like such a Person who practices evil, but you are to forgive them so YOU can move on.

Also in life, people will always disappoint you because they are Sinners by nature. When you are persecuted for Christ, then remember you get a blessing stored up for you in heaven ..and so, its almost like we should want the persecution brought on to us ! Just so long as we are truly innocent .

 

[znr]

Being conned by a believer is one of the most disgusting things I've experienced in YEARS, David. Trust me, I have not given in and retaliated. I felt like it, I fought it, but in the end I'm not that gross. Thanks for your encouragment, appreciate it.

Youre being eaten up over it because you wont let God have it. , totally. I was in the same boat with a person recently. We are not to retaliate when we are wronged even though its tempting.

Learn what you can from this recent experience , and let God have the final say-so in what consequences are to come this Persons way .

You are not required to like such a Person who practices evil, but you are to forgive them so YOU can move on.

Also in life, people will always disappoint you because they are Sinners by nature. When you are persecuted for Christ, then remember you get a blessing stored up for you in heaven ..and so, its almost like we should want the persecution brought on to us ! Just so long as we are truly innocent .

 

[ToBeBlessed]

Being conned by a believer is one of the most disgusting things I've experienced in YEARS, David. Trust me, I have not given in and retaliated. I felt like it, I fought it, but in the end I'm not that gross. Thanks for your encouragment, appreciate it.

It's wonderful to hear that you are doing well.

Sometimes it takes a little time, but you seem well on your way.

 

[parsley]

Being conned by a believer is one of the most disgusting things I've experienced in YEARS

It's so hard to grasp how people can claim to be part of a lay-down-your-life religion, then operate with such greed and spite.

boogala[/color]]i type for the most part just like you

Sometimes I type, then backspace out the re's and u's... a little OCD to change it.

Interesting to combine conversations on cultural differences, with drastic ethical differences. There is certainly a line to be drawn with what should be considered acceptable ethically.

 

[znr]

It's so hard to grasp how people can claim to be part of a lay-down-your-life religion, then operate with such greed and spite.

After some digging around I found that she is now promoting a "cash gifting" program...don't ask me what that is, I only know it has to do with money changing hands in mysterious ways, I don't really know. But what I discovered is that she has actually created a fake testimony claiming she is making 1000s per day just receiving money in the mail, and she's using this fake testimony to get people to send her money in the mail..the testimony is complete with her story and her kids and her physical illness and how a mother of 2 has overcome poverty...it's pretty gross. If nothing else, finding this out gives me some reassurance: I hadn't just imagined the extent of her lying, now it's very clear that she is a liar. And if she needs to, she uses the name of the Lord to get what she wants from people. For a few minutes there I thought I might be too harsh or critical toward her, but no. I reacted correctly.

 

[znr]

The only relevant part of this song is the "liar" part.

LIAR! LIAR! LIAR!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UU7PQ4O_jr8

 

[znr]

liar!

liar!

liar!

liar!

 

[ToBeBlessed]

liar!

liar!

liar!

liar!

Get it all out, so you can move on girl!

 

[znr]

It was very targeted, and very personal, and because she was a total stranger who gained my trust in a matter of months, it got to me. I'm not usually easy to prey on. But don't worry, I'll move on.

Get it all out, so you can move on girl!

 

[JennyGirlz]

Grow up znr. You need to stop being a winer and a lower. It's not all about you..

 

[znr]

Don't even know how to reply to this.

Grow up znr. You need to stop being a winer and a lower. It's not all about you..

 

[Goodbook]

Hey, just want to say youll get through this. I was conned by a believer..or someone who said he was..he earned my trust while sneakily stealing from me..what a hassle. He wouldnt own up to the wrong doing and was scamming others as well. Oh and he would quote scripture as well...

I learned to be wiser and let God handle it..and he did. If he ever comes back to ask for forgiveness and actually pay back the money he stole..of course I could welcome him as a brother. But he didnt..although he did write for me to visit him in rehab and that he could 'use' a friend..code for stealing more money or asking for a loan.
God gave me wisdom not to fall into the sympathy trap.

Anyway what happened was the bank repaid the money because they didn't pick up on the dodgy atm transactions so I didn't lose financially. I'm sure God will restore to you what the locust had eaten, don't expect the locusts to give you anything in return. Pray for this woman, that she sees the error of her ways and God have mercy on her cos shell definitely have some explaining to do come judgement day if she doesn't repent now.