Hello,
in the past I had a few negative experiences which are dragging me down and I don't know what to think about this and I'd like to hear what others think about this.
A few months ago I emailed a pastor and asked for advice on healing. He replied and then I replied back with more questions and then for many weeks he did not reply anymore and I did not know why and I thought he had just gotten annoyed by me and wasn't going to reply anymore which really upset me and also sadened me and so I wrote him an email where I was bitter and told him that I have experienced this before that christians simply let me down and didn't reply to me anymore, which is probably why I now always think the worst when people don't reply anymore.
And then this pastor replied back telling me how impudent I am and that he also has other things to do and that he had no time to reply yet.
But I think that this argument isn't really convincing because he could at least have sent me a short note that he is busy and will reply when he has time. This would have taken only a few seconds.
And then he said that actually he had already written an answer for me and was still waiting for a friend who was trying to see wether there are churches in my area which he could recommend to me.
Okay, I did not know that and I did him wrong with my bitter email.
But due to my past experiences I simply always expect the worst. I have been let down and was promised help and then got no help or pastors simply stopped replying which is really sad.
But I also think that at least letting me know that he is busy or that he has already written a reply should have been possible. I was waiting for many weeks without knowing what was going on. I can't read minds and if I had known that he has not forgotten about me I would not have been upset.
But here comes the really upsetting part. After he had told me that he had already written a reply he did not send it to me because he was now angry at me. Is this okay? I mean even if I did him wrong then is it okay to withhold help from somebody who needs help simply because you're angry at this person? What do you think about this? I found this really immature and personally I wouldn't want a pastor who is like that. Do you think that God would approve such a behavior?
And what also totally angered me was his hypocritical "I still pray for you" or something like that at the end of his email. He is withholing his answer from me which could have helped me and then he acts like he cares about me how hypocritical and disgusting is this?
And this is not the only negative experience I made. These experiences really make me doubt most christians. I have a very hard time now to trust pastors who come across like they are okay because I always think that even if they act like they're nice you can never know how they really are and how they'd treat someone like me.
And another thing I wanted to ask: Let's say you make a negative experience with a pastor who is well known or on TV then should you simply forget about this and "cover" it or should you warn others about what happened to you? Personally I think that such things should not be kept silent and that other christians have a right to know about such things. If everybody who makes bad experiences with christians who are in public then nobody will ever know if they are okay or not. How can this be good? Many christians have the stance that you must not talk about such things and simply forgive the people and move on but if everybody does this then ministers could mistreat people and nobody would find out about it. This cannot be good.
in the past I had a few negative experiences which are dragging me down and I don't know what to think about this and I'd like to hear what others think about this.
A few months ago I emailed a pastor and asked for advice on healing. He replied and then I replied back with more questions and then for many weeks he did not reply anymore and I did not know why and I thought he had just gotten annoyed by me and wasn't going to reply anymore which really upset me and also sadened me and so I wrote him an email where I was bitter and told him that I have experienced this before that christians simply let me down and didn't reply to me anymore, which is probably why I now always think the worst when people don't reply anymore.
And then this pastor replied back telling me how impudent I am and that he also has other things to do and that he had no time to reply yet.
But I think that this argument isn't really convincing because he could at least have sent me a short note that he is busy and will reply when he has time. This would have taken only a few seconds.
And then he said that actually he had already written an answer for me and was still waiting for a friend who was trying to see wether there are churches in my area which he could recommend to me.
Okay, I did not know that and I did him wrong with my bitter email.
But due to my past experiences I simply always expect the worst. I have been let down and was promised help and then got no help or pastors simply stopped replying which is really sad.
But I also think that at least letting me know that he is busy or that he has already written a reply should have been possible. I was waiting for many weeks without knowing what was going on. I can't read minds and if I had known that he has not forgotten about me I would not have been upset.
But here comes the really upsetting part. After he had told me that he had already written a reply he did not send it to me because he was now angry at me. Is this okay? I mean even if I did him wrong then is it okay to withhold help from somebody who needs help simply because you're angry at this person? What do you think about this? I found this really immature and personally I wouldn't want a pastor who is like that. Do you think that God would approve such a behavior?
And what also totally angered me was his hypocritical "I still pray for you" or something like that at the end of his email. He is withholing his answer from me which could have helped me and then he acts like he cares about me how hypocritical and disgusting is this?
And this is not the only negative experience I made. These experiences really make me doubt most christians. I have a very hard time now to trust pastors who come across like they are okay because I always think that even if they act like they're nice you can never know how they really are and how they'd treat someone like me.
And another thing I wanted to ask: Let's say you make a negative experience with a pastor who is well known or on TV then should you simply forget about this and "cover" it or should you warn others about what happened to you? Personally I think that such things should not be kept silent and that other christians have a right to know about such things. If everybody who makes bad experiences with christians who are in public then nobody will ever know if they are okay or not. How can this be good? Many christians have the stance that you must not talk about such things and simply forgive the people and move on but if everybody does this then ministers could mistreat people and nobody would find out about it. This cannot be good.
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