I give up

[High Fidelity]

Knw --

What did you mean you've wasted your life on education?

 

[knw1991]

Susie you gave so much hope in your message. I really thought the advice I got from my sister was what God probably wanted me to know. I know I've defined my self worth based on my father's choices like my sister said. I just felt in that moment when she told me to expect him to die because he hasn't made changes or sought help, that God would say the same. I told her how could I live on with no hope. I know my father's problems aren't my own but how can anyone move on knowing that he could die, God forbid.

I really appreciate all of you all help. You all gave me hope. Thank you for taking the time to respond to each part of my message. I'm sorry for doubting and disrespecting God. I was just angry and felt that God also wanted me to accept and expect that my father could overdose on drugs and that I can't expect him to change. I was feeling that God allowed me to be born into a hopeless situation that would just cause pain and end hopeless. I'm having a hard time trusting God with my life and knowing how He feels about me. The bible says God is always there and cares but my mind tells me is not there and isn't interested in my life. I am trying to overcome these false beliefs through a book I have. Please keep praying for me

 

[High Fidelity]

Susie you gave so much hope in your message. I really thought the advice I got from my sister was what God probably wanted me to know. I know I've defined my self worth based on my father's choices like my sister said. I just felt in that moment when she told me to expect him to die because he hasn't made changes or sought help, that God would say the same. I told her how could I live on with no hope. I know my father's problems aren't my own but how can anyone move on knowing that he could die, God forbid.

I really appreciate all of you all help. You all gave me hope. Thank you for taking the time to respond to each part of my message. I'm sorry for doubting and disrespecting God. I was just angry and felt that God also wanted me to accept and expect that my father could overdose on drugs and that I can't expect him to change. I was feeling that God allowed me to be born into a hopeless situation that would just cause pain and end hopeless. I'm having a hard time trusting God with my life and knowing how He feels about me. The bible says God is always there and cares but my mind tells me is not there and isn't interested in my life. I am trying to overcome these false beliefs through a book I have. Please keep praying for me

We're human, we're bound to have doubts, especially during periods of intense adversity. Don't feel bad! Take a step back, assess why you're having doubts, write it down if you need to, and work on it and work through it.
If you need help then we are your family here and there are resources here, public and private, where you can express grievances and doubts and have them addressed and discussed by posters as well as ordained members of ministry.

As for your father passing away under those circumstances, yes, it absolutely is a shame, but God gave us free will. If someone chooses or feels compelled to live a particular lifestyle and can't break away from it, ultimately it falls on that person to take personal responsibility for their actions and address it.

Has he tried rehab at all?

 

[knw1991]

Knw --

What did you mean you've wasted your life on education?

I meant that pursuing a degree was a waste because I spent 4 years of my life at a university from 18-22 while others were living their lives. I missed out on life

 

[knw1991]

We're human, we're bound to have doubts, especially during periods of intense adversity. Don't feel bad! Take a step back, assess why you're having doubts, write it down if you need to, and work on it and work through it.
If you need help then we are your family here and there are resources here, public and private, where you can express grievances and doubts and have them addressed and discussed by posters as well as ordained members of ministry.

As for your father passing away under those circumstances, yes, it absolutely is a shame, but God gave us free will. If someone chooses or feels compelled to live a particular lifestyle and can't break away from it, ultimately it falls on that person to take personal responsibility for their actions and address it.

Has he tried rehab at all?

Yes he says he has but he goes around people who do drugs and the cycle continues.

I don't know why I'm having doubts. I just wish God would help me because for three years I've suffered and don't see any hope in sight. Why doesn't God see that I am losing hope and this is bothering me. I try to believe he is my heavenly father but how can he be if I feel distant from Him. Fathers comfort their children, I feel like I've been carrying my burdens alone and no mstter how much I cry I can't get the help that I need.

 

[knw1991]

I don't know how ill make it through the day. I don't have hope. I can't forget what she said.

 

[High Fidelity]

I meant that pursuing a degree was a waste because I spent 4 years of my life at a university from 18-22 while others were living their lives. I missed out on life

Lots of people do it! The time you spent during those years will pay you back in the future.
Trust me, I'm 25, didn't finish my degree and I regret it immensely now that I'd rather be focused on meeting someone and settling down instead of worrying about what or when to study etc.

 

[knw1991]

Lots of people do it! The time you spent during those years will pay you back in the future.
Trust me, I'm 25, didn't finish my degree and I regret it immensely now that I'd rather be focused on meeting someone and settling down instead of worrying about what or when to study etc.

You can still go back to school it's never too late.

 

[knw1991]

I don't know if I should have hope , I don't know if God would say the same thing about my father. I can't find hope when talking to my family because they don't give advice based on the bible but I don't know if the bible gives hope for my situation either.

 

[knw1991]

I was rejected from one of the PA programs I applied to. I feel discouraged now that I'll be rejected from them all. I don't have the qualifications that other students have in regards to health care experience. Others have gathered over thousands of hours in health care and all I've done was volunteered for a year at a hospice center.

 

[knw1991]

At least it won't be a shock if I get rejected from them all.

 

[knw1991]

Maybe I should just stay away from God. I don't belong

 

[Susie~Q]

I have been reading all the posts.

First off, again, education is NEVER a waste, no learning is. I think a person, if they can, should study all their life. It has be proven, that older folks that study, run less of a risk of Alzheimer's that others that do not.

Man, you are sure being told lies by Satan, YOU DO TOO BELONG TO GOD. Man girl, He died for you, if that is NOT belonging, nothing is, I tell you, He loved you so much he suffered more than any of us will ever know or comprehend. He desires for everyone to belong to Him, unfortunately, however, only those that are "saved" can have that relationship.

I am so sorry that you got turned down from one of the PA schools. Do not give up, there are others out there. Maybe this would help, if there are any community colleges that offer "Medical Assisting" programs, take that first, it is usually about a year, then, try again for the PA, many MA's go into that after they have been the Medical Assistant, they often go hand in hand.

 

[knw1991]

Thank you Susue. I just can't win this battle. How do I even recognize a lie when everything in my life supports that lie. Everywhere I go I'm confronted with my reality that I'm fatherless and single. It still stings that someone I'm close to told me I should accept that my dad will overdose on cocaine. She told me that I have to accept the cards I was dealt. It was cold. I feel like I was BORN to lose, to suffer losses that I can't control like not having a dad while I sit back and watch others enjoy a blessing everyone should have got just because of the simple fact that its healthy for them. I literally feel like I'm just awaiting another loss, and next on the list will be rejection from schools, then singleness forever. I know I sound selfish but I just can't take the disapointment anymore. Can anything good come out my life, does God love me like he loves others ? I know he's disappointed in my lack of faith but after the losses and hurt I've experienced, the suicudal idealation and behavior why should I believe anything good can happen to me? I have too much baggage. I can't even help and be a source of hopeful words to someone struggling because I don't see hope for myself. Hope seems so far away. I guess what I'm saying is that I'm meant to lose, to be incomplete, to be alone because I was the day I was born. I just don't know my void is going to be okay living with wounds and empty voids

 

[knw1991]

I'm not worth enough for anyone, I shouldn't be alive

 

[knw1991]

I just can't win this battle against these supposed lies that are true to me. I want to throw in the towel because no matter how much I try to believe the bible ill lose at some point. I it's a daily battle and everyday I have to fight these thoughts away and I am just too weak, I'm discouraged because I've been struggling like this over 3 years and how much more does God think I can take. My life is over, why doesn't God understand that I'm not strong enough I can't go on

 

[Okano]

I'm sorry Kendra.

 

[knw1991]

I'm not. I'm glad a finally have a reason to die

 

[Jeshu]

The truth is that God loves you and through Jesus Christ wants to be your Heavenly Father. It is for you to step into that truth, God's love is awaiting you there.

This is where the battle is at. Your depression denies you light at the end of the tunnel. The truth of the Bible is the light at the end of the tunnel.

Through faith in God's truth we can escape the horror of depression's lies. I know that I did.

So yes if you want to die, die to the lies that have been ruling you and step into the truth of God and stay with Him for with Him there is life.

It is awesome to be loved by God, for there is safety in His embrace, safety from the cruel reality of this world.

The truth of the Gospel is more powerful then the reality of depression's lies.

Please put your hope and trust in Him, it is your way out of the bind you find yourself in.

 

[knw1991]

There's no hope I keep holding onto a false hope that will lead me back to where I am, the bible just feels like words on a page and that there is no hope in them. There is no purpose for this hurt and I can't find God he's left me to suffer through it all alone nobody is with me and no one understands I just want to die and not feel why am I forgotten how did I get to this place of darkness how long do I have to beg for help just to sustaining life. If god won't help who will