I do not want to believe anymore!

[Cormack]

Belief (The human delusion)

What else can I say?

Oh my days, tasting is believing! Honestly that chat is so dumb, it’s right up my alley. Excellent share, distracting, but excellent.

 

[Cormack]

@Kostilaks, try to let go of those destructive compulsions you might have, but don’t worry about your faith, that’s not the heart of the matter. You need family, friends, regular eating habits and exercise.

Faith can raise questions in our lives, but make sure that you’re not feeling misplaced issues and seeing them in your faith.

If you have questions about religion though, there are very respectful and knowledgeable Christians out there who can speak to your worries with reason, clarify and kindness.



PS avoid religious topics that get your fires going We all need more peace these days.

 

[splish- splash]

This is because for 99% of the time you're carrying your load yourself. No wonder you've become so rundown. Instead of worrying about what ocd says, try worrying about, what God's word says over your life.. He is speaking to you right now, though His word incase you didn't know.

 

[Jamdoc]

how you know that Bible is right?

Fulfilled prophecy.
If you read Isaiah 53, written hundreds of years before Jesus and then the gospels, if you read Psalm 22, again hundreds of years before Jesus, and then the gospels, in fact, Jesus quoted Psalm 22 on the cross. To show, yes, this was written before He was even born, and the rest of it gives a picture of the crucifixion before it happened by hundreds of years. The apostles witnessed Jesus risen from the dead after Crucifixion and all of them except John were martyred for their belief, they would not renounce their belief that Jesus raised from the dead even to save their own life. If they had been lying, and not really believed what they preached, there's no way they'd let themselves get crucified, stoned, and beheaded over it. John himself was exiled. None of them had cushy lives. Paul was not of the original 12, but he was stoned and left for dead. He himself used to persecute early Christians (before they were even known as Christians). Paul converted and began preaching Jesus to gentiles, he wrote half of the New Testament, why would he do this if it was all a lie to him? He had no reason to persist in this faith that he himself had once thought was a sham.

Many other religions can make prophetic claims. But which others have had fulfillment of those prophecies?

 

[Jamdoc]

i do not want to have guilty thoughts anymore.

I am tired and i am mentally ill and I have a depression and I cant follow Jesus.

I HAVE HAD ENOUGH!

I DO NOT WANT TO SEPND MY LIFE FOLLOWING JESUS AND FEELING GUILTY AND PRESSURE AND THEN, FIND OUT THAT MAYBE MUSLIMS, OR HINDU PEOPLE WERE RIGHT.

I AM ILL AND I CANT DO THIS ANYMORE. I WANT TO FEEL HAPPY AGAIN AND FREE. IF I NEED TO STOP BELIEVING OR THINKING ABOUT GOD FOR SOME TIME THEN, I BETTER DO IT IN ORDER FOR THE SAKE OF MY HEALTH.

cant i have some rest?

I AM ILL!

should i now feel guilty for saying this? should i feel guilty for expressing my feelings? should i feel guilty for having mental illness? should i feel guilty that many religions exist and that I am confused?

and if I make a wrong choice with religion, then do I deserve hell?

so, I live in a corrupted world that suffering and evil exist. I have a depression and many doubts about life. many doubts about religion. Maybe all religion are manmade and false. even Jesus. maybe not.

We cant be sure for anything. so, do I deserve hell if logic and knowledge leads me not to believe to Jesus? Should I use the fear of hell to persuade myself and be brainwashed to believe in Jesus?

I just, cant understand why so many people believe in Jesus. Because the Bible says so? Why you follow the Bible but reject the Qur'An and not the other way round?

I can understand to a degree. I got mad at God for years and didn't want to believe in Him anymore. But I couldn't do it. I could claim to be "agnostic" to my friends but still found myself talking to Him even when I didn't want to be on speaking terms.
I'm not sure if God will let you stop believing, if you ever really believed. Even if you want to stop believing, even if you cram your head full of other theories about how things came to pass or other religions.. it's impossible to drop belief completely.

 

[Crabcake]

I also feel the burden of being Christian. In fact, just this morning I was tempted to give up Christianity because it seemed impossible to do all the things I was commanded, specifically to forgive. I've been tempted quite a lot lately. But here's the thing: we aren't meant to carry that kind of weight. We can't be perfect. Jesus can! Jesus is! And He's our righteousness. If we're getting guilty feelings that aren't constructive, that's probably not God. In fact, God is gentle and will bring you to repentance. He's not seeking to shame you constantly. He wants to correct you so you come back in lovely relationship with Him. He is a loving God and He will be loving towards His children! Constantly plaguing you with guilt of how bad you are isn't in His agenda. He wants us to talk with Him freely and have a pure conscience.

As for proving how Christianity is true, that's why it's called a faith. We put our hope in Jesus and the Bible. Without it needing faith, everyone would be believing it. Just like gravity, people wouldn't be able to deny it. However, God has already spoken of Himself in nature. Just look at your hand! How could there not be a Creator? Again, as some others have said, the Bible holds many prophecies and hasn't been wrong yet! (And won't be.) Also, can you honestly say that the commands of the Bible aren't moral? You could argue about the Old Testament being harsh, but sin is harsh, and ultimately those things are for the good of the people. They were loving, even if we can't explain it. God is often beyond our comprehension.
But commands like love your enemy, forgive others, love love love? All of those things are so pure. Not one of God's commands are impure.

 

[sunshineforJesus]

Jesus told us that the Christian life would not be a bowl full of soft, delicious caramel chocolates or a bed of roses or smooth sailing. He told us that if we want to be a follower of His we had to deny our selfish desires and take up a cross of suffering. He told us that we would have those who hate us. He told us to keep our eyes upon Him, NOT the storm.

This is great advice.

 

[Monksailor]

I wish I could get advice too. Seriously, I'm constantly fantasizing about killing the God of this universe. I hate existence itself, and dream about undoing it, blows my mind

If you think that you are wiser and more powerful and able to be in all places at the same time, even in your dreams and fantasies, than the God of the universe (you would not be able to "kill" Him if you weren't) there is no advice from a mere human or our God, Jehovah, Yahweh, "worthy" of you as you believe somehow yourself to be better than all.

Once you come down to reality where you are not so deluded and deceived and God's Holy Word can be accepted by you try going through the verses below in my signature. I love you. God loves you so much. You are not a hopeless case. You need to recognize Him, God, for Who and What and Where He is. We are a speck of dust, a grain of sand in the ocean, a filthy menstrual rag in a day of no disposables or washing machines or textile plants or even toilet paper, plastic, Kleenx, or paper towels (Isa 64:6, below), a pile of dung compared to God. God is All-Powerful, All-Knowing, and All-Present. You actually think, in ANY state of being, that you could actually kill God??? Me thinketh that thou playeth too muchest on XBox or whatever gaming stuff they have out there today. But I was young and very deceived and deluded once and God brought me to my senses and into His home and heart. His love felt and His Fatherhood enjoyed is better than ANYTHING.

 

[Crabcake]

Also, please, please keep on trusting God. He WANTS you. He wants you so much. So run to Him, even if you're angry at Him, even if you're doubting Him. Talk with Him about it and tell Him how you feel. He's listening. You don't have to believe in gravity for it to be true. So seek after Him and you WILL find Him!

 

[Monksailor]

Yeah, I've lost it.

Maybe so, BUT like I ALSO said, it is not hopeless. He even saved me and that says a LOT. He never stops loving people, believer or not, but to be saved and in His family for all eternity you must make the move, the recognition, the decision, the choice, and commitment. You need to come to the point of a child taking the FATHER'S hand in FAITH trusting in His love and protection and care.

If you are not plagued with the fallout of gaming then you could suffer from other problems which also affect your recognition and operation in reality. Your thoughts are not normal; they are not healthy; they are dangerous to you and potentially to others. Have you sought out the help of a good Counselor?

From what you have already shared here an Islamic Hater and Murder group might be knocking on your door (yes, they can easily find out where you are) or sitting beside you in that public place in minutes recruiting you to do just what you said you fantasize doing with their Jihad. The personality you share would be easy prey for them or any other hate group or person wanting to eliminate the "existence" of those they hate or need to terminate. CTU and other govmt authorities might come knocking or have you watched now, also, for that reason.

It is normally required protocol for any entity hosting or employing people to report any incident where someone communicates a desire to hurt themselves or others.

OH!!! I just discovered that I am in an OCD forum. I do not aim for specific forums in my search to post. I just go to "New Threads." I try VERY HARD to stay out of several as I am not welcome there due to me being a Protestant or not Single or not saddled with specific Mental Health issues or not the specific type of Protestant or ....... Please forgive my apparent ignorance of where I was but most of what I said is relevant and appropriate. I see that you struggle with an Obsession. I cannot relate to that but I respect it being a valid DX'd problem. Please forgive my lack of empathy, I did not know. But regardless of your condition you do need to hear most, if not all, of what I said and that caution or warning I gave. BUT you should already be well aware of that if you are in counseling.

 

[Crabcake]

Well I don't want him! He can take his planet (His universe) and stick it where the light will always shine.

I sincerely hope you change your mind. If you change your mind during your life on earth, know that God will completely save you. But as you say so now, you are choosing to walk in darkness and if you die in darkness, there is no chance to repent after death. I am truly very sorry for your choice and will pray for God to open your eyes.

 

[Monksailor]

What I DO know about obsessions is that they are one of the 4 ways in which satan influences or attacks humans. A few decades ago I was put into a situation where I had to confront a serious demonic situation and had to study up on the situation. Of the books I read, the best was "The Adversary" by Mark Bubeck: https://www.amazon.com/Adversary-Christian-Versus-Demon-Activity/dp/0802401430 . It was the most practical and useful book on the matter I could find at the time. He explains these 4 ways: Harassment, Oppression, Obsession, and Possession. A believer cannot be possessed as he is already possessed by the Holy Spirit and Christ who are more powerful than him. But believers can be impeded by the other three, including Obsessions. OCD can be a Spiritual matter as well. The book is a very good book in helping one, IF THEY NEED TO, confront satan or his demons, directly. It is NOT a book for entertainment BUT OF NEED, ONLY. I think he cautions the reader of this in the beginning of the book.

Kostilaks, by their own confession is a Christian from Greece, hence they cannot be possessed. There can be a very indistinguishable fine line between the outward appearance of Obsession and Possession, but in Kostilaks case it is apparently Obsession.

 

[Monksailor]

It would seem to me that an Obsession, for a Christian, removes your focus and hold upon the Anchor of life, our Savior and Lord of the universe and clouds that out or cuts the rope with focus upon things or matters of life. Maybe similar to the disciples' anxious and terrified focus upon the raging storm while Jesus slept peaceably in the boat.

No matter what grabs our focus in life we must never let go of or allow the distraction to make us forget that we are securely held by the anchor and can weather any storm of life. "The Anchor Holds" is a good song for this thought.

In sailing the ocean or great depths like the Great Lakes, one must make sure that they have a sea anchor (think parachute with hole in center) aboard for foul weather. Lined or chained anchors are useless in ragging seas and can sink a ship in one wave if the bottom can even be reached with limited anchor rode (line), which usually it can"t. A sea anchor on the other hand, allows the boat to drift with the sailboat or other boat with the (front) bow facing the wind and waves staying on top of the water. In sailboats, and I suppose other boats, the bow of the boat is designed to take on a wave coming over the ship and resurface rightly. No other side is designed so, though the stern (rear) might survive sometimes but probably the water of a large wave crashing upon the vast open astern deck on most boats would probably flip the boat backwards or compromise its integrity. So, if power has failed making it impossible to keep the boat on a course into the wind or less desired, running from a storm which it is normally more risky to do, you can deploy a sea anchor from the bow which will create drag in the water and keep you facing the wind and waves and afford you the best chances to survive the storm, securing sails and such and battening down the hatches, of course. Noteworthy, is the fact that a sea anchor is designed to be very light and not take up much room in spite of its power and strength.

Jesus is not only our lined anchor to the bottom in calmer, shallower seas but in the ragging, deep seas He is our Sea Anchor. He is easily carried and doesn't take up much space; mobile. When we find ourselves seemingly hopeless, full of anxiety and fear in the uncharted, ragging deep seas of life where our normal hold upon the solid Rock is lost and our power fails we can deploy Jesus, the Sea Anchor; He is mobile and assures us that He will NEVER leave or forsake us. He will hold you in the security of His peace and love and you WILL weather the storm.

 

[Crabcake]

Right now, darkness is my blanket.

What if what you thought was comforting is actually a mirage? What if you're covering your eyes with a blanket but you're actually lying in the middle of the road? You have to have that comfort removed so you can realize you're on the road and get out of danger. Not to mention an all expenses paid luxury hotel is just a few feet away from you. Free massages, a nice bed, free meals, and you can stay forever. I hope you remove your blanket soon.

 

[Crabcake]

What if what you thought was comforting is actually a mirage? What if you're covering your eyes with a blanket but you're actually lying in the middle of the road? You have to have that comfort removed so you can realize you're on the road and get out of danger. Not to mention an all expenses paid luxury hotel is just a few feet away from you. Free massages, a nice bed, free meals, and you can stay forever. I hope you remove your blanket soon.

If you're interested, here's a link to the hotel: https://www.theChristianworldview.org/about-us-2/what-must-do-to-be-saved/

 

[public hermit]

I AM ILL

Kostilaks, I'm sorry you are still struggling with this. Have you sought out the help of a docter, yet? There are treatments available, but you have to go. Will you please find someone in your area?

 

[Monksailor]

I never watched that trashy program except for a minute or two the first and only time and never will again. Speak to me in your own words, not somebody else's, anyway.

 

[Mari17]

i do not want to have guilty thoughts anymore.

I am tired and i am mentally ill and I have a depression and I cant follow Jesus.

I HAVE HAD ENOUGH!

I DO NOT WANT TO SEPND MY LIFE FOLLOWING JESUS AND FEELING GUILTY AND PRESSURE AND THEN, FIND OUT THAT MAYBE MUSLIMS, OR HINDU PEOPLE WERE RIGHT.

I AM ILL AND I CANT DO THIS ANYMORE. I WANT TO FEEL HAPPY AGAIN AND FREE. IF I NEED TO STOP BELIEVING OR THINKING ABOUT GOD FOR SOME TIME THEN, I BETTER DO IT IN ORDER FOR THE SAKE OF MY HEALTH.

cant i have some rest?

I AM ILL!

should i now feel guilty for saying this? should i feel guilty for expressing my feelings? should i feel guilty for having mental illness? should i feel guilty that many religions exist and that I am confused?

and if I make a wrong choice with religion, then do I deserve hell?

so, I live in a corrupted world that suffering and evil exist. I have a depression and many doubts about life. many doubts about religion. Maybe all religion are manmade and false. even Jesus. maybe not.

We cant be sure for anything. so, do I deserve hell if logic and knowledge leads me not to believe to Jesus? Should I use the fear of hell to persuade myself and be brainwashed to believe in Jesus?

I just, cant understand why so many people believe in Jesus. Because the Bible says so? Why you follow the Bible but reject the Qur'An and not the other way round?

Kostilaks, I think that for some of your questions, you might benefit from studying apologetics.

But I'm wondering if the core of this issue is your struggle with OCD. In that case, your view of God and Christianity is likely tainted by the oppression of your obsessions. Many people with religious OCD feel like this, when their OCD is acting up.

If that is the case, the problem is not Christianity itself, but the distortions of it caused by your obsessions. It's kind of like a person with a germ obsession saying, "Because I'm so afraid of germs, I'm choosing not to believe in germs anymore so I can get some peace." The problem is not the germs themselves; they are real. The problem is that the person has an exaggerated fear of germs, which is causing the distressing feelings. Anyway, if you were to give up on Christianity because of OCD, likely your OCD would just find something else for you to worry about. So really, the key is to keep working on your OCD, and that will make all of your life (including your relationship with God!) much, much better.

I can't remember if I've suggested it before, but there's a good online support group on Facebook, for people with anxiety disorders. I invite you to consider joining it, as there are quite a few people with OCD on there and you might find it helpful. Here is the link: Facebook Groups

 

[Mari17]

I wish I could get advice too. Seriously, I'm constantly fantasizing about killing the God of this universe. I hate existence itself, and dream about undoing it, blows my mind

Why do you hate existence?

 

[Crabcake]

There's no place like that on earth. So I'll just continue living on the streets, and using my pension money for a few days in hotel paradise. Maybe until drop dead, other than this, who knows.

It was a metaphor for being unsaved vs. saved. Immanent death with a blinding comfort vs. so much peace and security that's real.

May I ask why you're angry with God?