I did somthing VERY bad when I was 14

[QuickQeustion]

Recently I have been going over my life and apologising to God for any sins I've comminted. But I've recently remebered somthing that has been ruining my life.

When I was 14, I masturbated over a picture of an animated dragon.

Let me make evrything clear
When I was 14, I had a really bad masturbation problem. I had to touch a few times a day.
It was one night and it was there. I dont fully remember if I did or not, but I dont want to take the chance.
I AM NOT INTO BEASTIALITY, I never was, never will be.
I know it was the hormones that made me do it, I never did it again, and never thought about it

Basically I needed to touch, and that was the nearest female thing.

I feel SO terrible. I've prayed forgiveness to God daily. normally somthing like "God. I am so sorry. I was compleltly wrong to do such a thing. I have never done anything like that again and never will. Please God, forgive me of my sin and give me the stregth to move on."
But I get a horrible feeling afterwards that I shouldnt move on. If do, and God hasnt forgiven me, will I go to hell?

I've always been catholic, and said no to anything bad. My friends once tried to get me to experiment with drugs, but I said no and stopped talking to them.
I never experement with drugs, sex or other guys which I know is common when as hormonal as I was. But I resisted the temptation to do that, so how'd I end up doing this???

I cant stand being aound my friends, knowing that they've never done somthing so terrible as I have (these arnt the ones who did drugs.)

I've been in a depression for the past 3 weeks over this. I pray and pray to God for forgivness but I dont get the feeling I normally do when I confess somthing to him. I know I kight not have actually done it, but why would I be worried if I didnt? But then again,, shouldnt I remember doing somthing like that?

I dont want to go to hell, and this HURTS so much. I used to be very cheerful and happy. But because of this I've only felt pain, sorrow, regret and disgust over what I've done

Sometimes I get a few minutes in which forget or even manage to let go of what I've done, but it hits me as hard as ever soon enough. My parents have noticed my depression and have asked whats wrong.
They know of my past masturbation addiction, but I can tell them this. The only one I could was God, and that was because I knew he already knew.

I wasnt and am not atracted to the dragon, I know it was the hormones. But that dosnt mean the pain will stop

I'm having trouble copin with my self and have thrown up out of stress. I look back at my life before I remebered this and it makes me cry.

Is it normal for a teenage guy to do such a thing??
Can God forgive me?
Can I ever forgive myslef?

I'm so so so sorry! I dont think I actually did it but at the same time I think did. Its hard to explain.
I cant stand myself at the moment although I wouldnt say I'm suicidle, I'm very much depressed and sorry.

I've tried to do things to make it up to God and show him how sorry I am such as give 5 pounds (10 dollars) to charity, throw away the 20 poound game with said dragon in, and tried to be an pverall better person

But it still hurts. I feel like the only person who's done such a thing
Is it okay because it was an accident? I know I wouldnt of even considered doing it if it was for the hormones. And when I did it, it didnt do anything for me either, like I was doing it to nothing almost.

Please dont read this and think "freak" and leave
Please help me!!

P.S sorry for the length of this post

 

[fated]

Got to confession. Confess it as an act of person impurity.

 

[intrepido]

1. Its not VERY bad. VERY bad would be to kill someone, don't exaggerate.

How old are you now first of all?

You need to understand something. When you profess your love for Jesus Christ, you accept him as your Lord and savior and repent of your sins, you receive eternal redemption, not temporal. Past, present and future sins, because you are covered by the blood of the lamb.

Believe me, God loves you more than anything. That's why he took on human form to become an example for us and to have something to believe in, a bridge of forgiveness if you will. Rest assured that God loves you and if you are feeling such remorse it means you are truly sorry for what you've done and he knows that, trust me.

God is a gazillion times more intelligent than you and I will EVER be, just look at the universe, the seas, the mountains and the plains. God is quite the artist, and he loves us very much.

We are his children, And he is our daddy.

About what you did, Dude, You have no idea what I've heard people do. There have been murderers that have turned their lives to Christ and are very happy now. You have no reason to be depressed, Jesus loves you very much!

Just imagine Jesus giving you a hug It's quite a comforting thought I try to have all the time.

Don't worry, you won't go to hell. This remorse shows you love God, and that alone is enough.

Relax a little and get yourself some Christian music and worship.

Charles

 

[QuickQeustion]

I am currently 15, I never felt temtep to do it before or after doing it
I know I've quit cause its been a full year and I havnt been tempted

 

[fated]

Don't worry so much, go to confession and get some mercy.

 

[intrepido]

Read my post again. As I said, It's not VERY BAD. You are exaggerating tremendously.

You are fifteen, you have your whole life ahead of you, and then an eternity in heaven where there's only joy.

BY THE WAY. If you are ashamed of going to penance and talking to the priest, you don't have to. It's not biblical. That's between YOU and the LORD. No one else. Ask for forgiveness in Jesus' name and then forgive yourself. Go, do it now.

 

[Bellicus]

It do sound like a strange thing to touch to, but: Terrible? Nope, I can't see what is so terrible about it. I have no idea what made such an impulse in you, but for sure I think that hormones would be a good answer to it.

Did you consider to look at it with humor, instead of this deep self-hatred? Like if I told you that I looked at a flower once and masturbated and were filled with a deep regret about it and thought of myself as the most terrible person in the world, would you think that I am a terrible man? Or would you just smile a bit about the odd situation?

And it is nothing terrible about masturbating to dragons or flowers, except whatever negative emotions this would cause inside of you. So generally I guess it is better to not touch about stuff like that, cause it will not really lead to anything good.

It can probably be categorized as a kind of sin, but really there is worse things you can do. This is not such a big deal as you make it. Get over it. God have forgiven you long ago.

 

[intrepido]

I'm with Bellicus.

 

[DreamsAreFree]

Don't worry so much, go to confession and get some mercy.

He doesn't have to go to confession to get mercy. Mercy is there right now - he's already confessed it, he's forgiven.

Mate, if that is the worst thing you do in your life, you're going to do very well!

You've confessed to God, he's forgiven you ... it's the devil that wants to keep you in this place, not God. If it makes you feel better, go to confession.

 

[bliz]

Christians are not all in agreement that masturbation is sinful; lust clearly is, but there is no universal agreement over masturbation.

However, even if masturbation is a sin, it is not the unpardonable sin. You would think it is, given how much some Christian groups talk about it, but human emphasis does no make it so.

Repent and ask God for forgiveness. Jesus stands with outstretched arms waiting for you to come to Him. He loves you and He has since before you were born.

 

[drich0150]

As 15 year old Catholic, "confession" is a tenement of faith.. Jesus said in Mt.16:19 and 18:18
What every you bind here on earth will be bound in heaven, and what ever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven.. The Catholics have bound themselves to the practice of "confession."

Once you put the "mechanics" of your religion behind you, know that "Masturbating to a picture of a dragon" Doesn't make you a "Beast-o-phile" It makes you a 14 year old that has been supercharged with hormones, that hasn't been properly instructed on how to Focus all of this new energy.. That's it... you said you have a different perspective on things now, so put the past behind you, and move on.

 

[fated]

He doesn't have to go to confession to get mercy. Mercy is there right now - he's already confessed it, he's forgiven.

Mate, if that is the worst thing you do in your life, you're going to do very well!

You've confessed to God, he's forgiven you ... it's the devil that wants to keep you in this place, not God. If it makes you feel better, go to confession.

He's Roman Catholic, if he's Roman Catholic, he goes to confession, his sins are absolved and he needn't worry about them again, in fact, doing so can even become sinful. You aren't Catholic. He's Catholic. If he's gone to Confession, then he needn't worry about it again, because Confession is effectual, and leaves no ambiguity about the forgiveness of the sin.

 

[intrepido]

it is not the unpardonable sin. You would think it is, given how much some Christian groups talk about it, but human emphasis does no make it so.

Oh gosh. Don't even mention the unpardonable sin to him, please. It will take him on an ugly ride, just like it did to me.

 

[fated]

Oh gosh. Don't even mention the unpardonable sin to him, please. It will take him on an ugly ride, just like it did to me.

Why would dying red handed or while dying while judging against God be an ugly ride?

 

[intrepido]

Why would dying red handed or while dying while judging against God be an ugly ride?

I don't understand your question.

As for the ugly ride, he has some signs of scrupulosity. Mentioning the unpardonable sin will make his case worse, just because he worries he's committed it, and trust me, it is ugly.

If you are reading this and think you've committed the unpardonable sin, you haven't, the holy spirit is still working on you if you feel remorse.

Just a heads up.

 

[fated]

I don't understand your question.

As for the ugly ride, he has some signs of scrupulosity. Mentioning the unpardonable sin will make his case worse, just because he worries he's committed it, and trust me, it is ugly.

If you are reading this and think you've committed the unpardonable sin, you haven't, the holy spirit is still working on you if you feel remorse.

Just a heads up.

I was describing the only objective way to ensure you've sinned against the spirit at the time of death. Anyway, yes, he does show signs of scrupulosity, but maybe it's just the reality of raging hormones, that keeps lust on the front of his problems list, he should change that to focus on humility. He should wear a religious medal to school.

 

[intrepido]

I was describing the only objective way to ensure you've sinned against the spirit at the time of death. Anyway, yes, he does show signs of scrupulosity, but maybe it's just the reality of raging hormones, that keeps lust on the front of his problems list, he should change that to focus on humility. He should wear a religious medal to school.

Well, you can know you haven't sinned against the spirit before dying. Just by showing remorse and wanting to be near the lord. If you had sinned against the spirit he would withdraw from you, and you would not care.

 

[Bellicus]

Oh gosh. Don't even mention the unpardonable sin to him, please. It will take him on an ugly ride, just like it did to me.

Here is a topic I made on the subject about unforgivable sin, and if you read the first 5 posts I think you will find peace in that, and not have these "ugly rides" again.

 

[Sketcher]

God can forgive you, you might as well forgive yourself and not repeat the performance.

 

[Lyle]

There is a difference between conviction and guilt.

Satan uses guilt to paralyze. The general since of, 'Oh, I am an awful person because of this.' Once you are forgiven you need accept the grace that has been given and move forward.... Let the one who has began a good work in you complete it.

And as far as comparing yourself to others, I think the phrase 'everybody poops' applies here. I am not the standard and neither is anyone else in this world. What God says is the standard and it's only by Jesus' death that we can hit that mark.