how wrong is this???

[Svt4Him]

Svt4Him... You are absolutely correct. The reason?...due to hardness of heart (I prefer to remain soft at heart) and though this is "allowed," it still ought to be the very last options. There is not much testimony of Christ working in our lives and doing miracles when we choose divorce, especially as the first way of resolution. I suggest asking the Lord what He might want one to learn from their life experience and see if He isn't calling one to live well above their human means. It generally takes a lot more reliance on God to live through the issues leading to divorce than it does to live through a divorce (especially when most just turn to another human being sometime soon after)...Michael

This is a misquote of Scripture. Moses allowed divorce because of hardness of heart, it had nothing to do with an affair, which Jesus Himself addressed right after that.

As for reliance on God, thats opinion at best. Having come from a family of divorced parents, then having survived an affair, I've seen both sides. To say one requires more faith is not true.

 

[awen]

I can't believe how many people are telling him to get a divorce! That's terrible! Whatever happened to "What God has joined together, let man not seperate"? Jesus said "whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery against her", and yet you're advocating this?

Why aren't you encouraging this man to devote himself to prayer and the Word in order to find God's perfect will?

cbudc, Michael is right here. There is no glory given to God in a divorce, no matter what the reason. God allowed (note, *allowed*, not sanctioned!) divorce because of the hardness of man's hearts, *not* because he knew it would sometimes be necessary, or because he knew that people would commit adultery!

The important thing to remember is this:

When it comes to marriage, those of us who are married have made two commitments. The first, we made before God on our wedding day, and that was to love, honour and cherish the man or woman that we devoted our lives to. The second, and most important, was to God, to do that very same thing! We made commitments to our wives and to God that we would love, honour and cherish the women we married.

cbudc, I'm sure you love your wife... and I've no doubt that you're hurting so badly right now, but you cannot listen to the advice that is pushing for divorce. Jesus Himself told us that divorce is not even an option.

I realise that this is an obscure, and at times, difficult book, but I'm quite sure that you could find some wonderful insights in the book of Hosea. God called Hosea to marry a prostitute(!) so that He could show a picture of His love toward Israel. Read this book, then follow Christ's example toward his church.

"Husbands, likewise, dwell with your wives with understanding, giving honour to the wife as the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered." 1 Peter 3:7


"Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her, that he might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word, that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish. So, husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself." Ephesians 5:25-28



My final piece of advice, cbudc, is this.

Going by the world's standards, you do, of course, have the right to divorce your wife. God's standards, however, should be made clear by the verses above. You're hurt, and rightfully so, but don't allow that hurt to make your decisions for you.

Sit down and write a letter to your wife. In it, speak no words of blame or anger or bitterness... just speak the truth. Tell her how much you love her, how much she's hurt you, and let her know that no matter what, you will always love her, despite how much she has hurt you. If you can, tell her that you forgive her, and that you would love to have the chance to sit down and talk about where things went wrong. I know right now it seems like everything is her fault - but perhaps (and you must be open to this, although it hurts!) her leaving was motivated in some way by your actions (or lack of action). You won't ever know unless you talk to her.

Take her out for coffee. That way you're in a non-threatening environment where neither of you have any power or influence over the other, and you can just talk. It also keeps arguments to a minimum and encourages you to be civil!

Finally...

don't give up. Pray without ceasing. Our God is the creator of heaven and earth, he can save one little marriage. More than that, he can heal your hurts, and hers, and restore to you the love you once had for each other. Remember: love your wife as Christ loves the church...

and you can't fail.

 

[Why?]

Matthew 19


Divorce

1When Jesus had finished saying these things, he left Galilee and went into the region of Judea to the other side of the Jordan. 2Large crowds followed him, and he healed them there.
3Some Pharisees came to him to test him. They asked, "Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?"
4"Haven't you read," he replied, "that at the beginning the Creator 'made them male and female,'[1] 5and said, 'For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh'[2] ? 6So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate."
7"Why then," they asked, "did Moses command that a man give his wife a certificate of divorce and send her away?"
8Jesus replied, "Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning. 9I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, and marries another woman commits adultery."
10The disciples said to him, "If this is the situation between a husband and wife, it is better not to marry."
11Jesus replied, "Not everyone can accept this word, but only those to whom it has been given. 12For some are eunuchs because they were born that way; others were made that way by men; and others have renounced marriage[3] because of the kingdom of heaven. The one who can accept this should accept it."



** underlined - Moses permitted them to divorce because their hearts were hard, not Jesus.

*** BOLD- Jesus permits divorce if a spouse cheats.

 

[LadyBird]

All I can tell you is to finish what have with your WIFE before you go and get together with your ex-girlfriend. Fix things with your wife. Whether that being, you sort things out and get back together or get divorced. She is your wife, and you guys are supposed to be commited to each other. Don't start something up with another woman. Just because your wife is cheating on you, it doesn't give you the right to go out and do the same to her.

 

[mghalpern]

Thank God... Finally, some sanity around here. I have almost always found that those who advocate divorce and/or remarriage is from those who have been through it and can't stand to believe that there is the slightest possibility that there is anything wrong with it. That is why I asked in another thread for those who divorced and/or remarried and thought that it was wrong to chime in and comment on it. I find it hard to believe that no one exists that fits this idea. I know many homosexuals that have told me that their lifestyle is wrong, but they don't know how to "get out of it." I'm not advocating that those who have remarried, leave their marriage, but again, I'm surprised that you can't find one person who thinks that they did anything wrong. We all know that we do a lot of things wrong in this life, but I guess not when to divorce and/or remarriage...Michael

 

[Svt4Him]

I'll choose to stick with the Bible on this one. As a matter of fact, I'd also go so far as to say that is what should be used as the measuring stick as to what's right and what's wrong.

Could just be me though...although I see others believe it too.

 

[Jenna]

Since it was brought up, I just wanted to make a real quick point. The bible says that divorce is PERMITTED due to adultery. Nowhere does it say that a person should or has to divorce because of it. It is so prevelant on this board, hearing people saying again and again that folks should seek divorce because it is permitted. I think that we just need to keep things more fair to those who are involved and be careful to not make people feel as though their peers see no other option for them. A person also has a great right to NOT divorce, and to try and salvage their marriage if they would like to. Divorce may be allowed, but it is not pleasing, ever. That's always something to think about. *sigh* All in all, time usually tells in matters like this. There is the possibility that life and maturity will catch up with her, and then the heart will change. Either way, you would get your answer. You would have time to think and pray, and she could either grow up or have you served with papers.

 

[mghalpern]

Since it was brought up, I just wanted to make a real quick point. The bible says that divorce is PERMITTED due to adultery. Nowhere does it say that a person should or has to divorce because of it. It is so prevelant on this board, hearing people saying again and again that folks should seek divorce because it is permitted. I think that we just need to keep things more fair to those who are involved and be careful to not make people feel as though their peers see no other option for them. A person also has a great right to NOT divorce, and to try and salvage their marriage if they would like to. Divorce may be allowed, but it is not pleasing, ever. That's always something to think about. *sigh* All in all, time usually tells in matters like this. There is the possibility that life and maturity will catch up with her, and then the heart will change. Either way, you would get your answer. You would have time to think and pray, and she could either grow up or have you served with papers.

Jenna... Thank you for being one to stand for marriage and the miracle that God can and wants to perform in every troubled marriage if we would just allow Him to...Michael

 

[cbudc]

I"m not going to get back with my ex. In fact I prayed last night and I've decided that it's best I just don't talk to her right now.

Yes, I love my wife and I do want to reconcile this marriage but she doesn't. I can't do anything about that. I've already wrote her a thousand times and told her how much I love her and want our marriage to work. I feel like I'm the one who messed up and beggin for forgiveness. Not anymore. That's rediculous. She knows how much I love her and want to be with her yet she doesn't seem to want to come back. So what am I supposed to do? Wait for the rest of my life to come back to me? No. I'm sorry I'm not doing that and I don't believe that God wants me to wait around my whole life for her. I am being paitient. I'm trying ever so hard. I prayed last night for the Lord to speak to me. Well in a way I felt He did. Maybe it's not but this is what happened.

Basically I had a dream about my wife and we were running around on base here and we went to the library where everything came out and I told her I forgave her and that it was ok. Then we walked out and she fell to her knees and asked for forgiveness and asked me never to leave her. Later in the dream we had gone to a Christmas party at one of our friends house from LR and as I was saying hi to everyone there was an older man that came up to me said hello steve, and i said I'm sorry i don't know you. he said, i'm the savior and kissed me on the cheek and left. It hit me this morning when i was getting ready for work. I'm not sure if that's the Lord speaking to me but I sure felt like it to me. I don't know? You think I"m crazy?

I want my wife back very much and I know the only way it will work is through the Lord and I've turned myself around and trusted Him a lot more than I did in the past. I want His will to be done. Thanks everyone.

 

[mojorising]

You made a commitment to your wife.

Honour it.

Life is difficult - it throws all kinds of awful things our way, and we deal with them the best way that we can. However, we can't see the future. Your wife may wake up tomorrow and realize what a terrible mistake she has made... but if you commit yourself to someone else, what then?

Take some time out for yourself. Think of all the reasons that you married your wife in the first place, and remember why you love her. Then remind yourself that you made a commitment to the Lord, not just to her, the day that you married.

I know you're hurt. I can't imagine how you could NOT be hurt. But don't let that hurt push you in the wrong direction. Allow it to push you toward the Lord, but never toward another woman, even if she's just a friend. God can, and has, done miraculous things in marriages, even bringing them back from the brink of divorce. He can heal any hurt, and bring peace and joy and love, where before, there was only heartache.

Trust Him, and pray.
I'll be praying for you.

Ben.

Good words from Ben.

mojo

 

[jazzbird]

It's wonderful that you desire restoration for your marriage and that you have made a decision against having contact with this other woman. I know that standing for your marriage when it seems so hopeless has to be so very hard, but you don't know what God has in store for you and your wife. He wants your marriage to be restored. Though I do believe that divorce is permissible in the case of adultery, I do not believe that it is usually the best way, even though it may seem better at the time. Our God can transform us -he can transform your marriage, your wife's heart, your heart.

 

[Jenna]

Amen!

 

[heartnsoul]

Svt4Him... You are absolutely correct. The reason?...due to hardness of heart (I prefer to remain soft at heart) and though this is "allowed," it still ought to be the very last options. There is not much testimony of Christ working in our lives and doing miracles when we choose divorce, especially as the first way of resolution. I suggest asking the Lord what He might want one to learn from their life experience and see if He isn't calling one to live well above their human means. It generally takes a lot more reliance on God to live through the issues leading to divorce than it does to live through a divorce (especially when most just turn to another human being sometime soon after)...Michael

Michael, that is being awfully presumptuous and judgemental to say that the reason is due to "hardness of the heart." Like I mentioned in my other posts about remarriage, divorce could be due to many reasons, NOT just hardness of the heart. Sometimes the people are just plain ignorant, spiritually immature or just plain incompatible. Some people marry too young and are just immature. I don't believe you can just categorize every divorce as "hardness of the heart." You said in another thread that you are not judgemental, but your words and persistent emails seems to point otherwise. Why must you keep harping on your own opinion? Like you said before, EVERYONE has his/her own opinion. Let them stand. It seems you go to great strides and numerous emails to force your opinion onto others. That's not fair. I pray that you become more compassionate and open-minded to other people's heartaches. You seem to see things only from your own world and reject other people's walk with God. I'm sorry my friend, but I really think someday you will be convicted of having a hardness of heart yourself. Of course you don't see it that way I know because you think your viewpoint is the ONLY *RIGHT* viewpoint. And as I stated many times already, unless you walk in someone's shoes, DO NOT JUDGE OTHERS FOR YOU WILL BE JUDGED. This will be my last post to you on this discussion.

 

[mghalpern]

Michael, that is being awfully presumptions and judgemental to say that the reason is due to "hardness of the heart." Like I mentioned in my other posts about remarriage, divorce could be due to many reasons, NOT just hardness of the heart. Sometimes the people are just plain ignorant, spiritually immature or just plain incompatible. Some people marry too young and are just immature. I don't believe you can just categorize every divorce as "hardness of the heart." You said in another thread that you are not judgemental, but your words and persistent emails seems to point otherwise. Why must you keep harping on your own opinion? Like you said before, EVERYONE has his/her own opinion. Let them stand. It seems you go to great strides and numerous emails to force your opinion onto others. That's not fair. I pray that you become more compassionate and open-minded to other people's heartaches. You seem to see things only from your own world and reject other people's walk with God. I'm sorry my friend, but I really think someday you will be convicted of having a hardness of heart yourself. Of course you don't see it that way I know because you think your viewpoint is the ONLY *RIGHT* viewpoint. And as I stated many times already, unless you walk in someone's shoes, DO NOT JUDGE OTHERS FOR YOU WILL BE JUDGED. This will be my last post to you on this discussion.

heartnsoul… First of all I think we may have a misunderstanding of what I was referring to. Biblically, Christ said is was permissible for a man to divorce his wife for sexual uncleanness, but that is was due to hardness of heart that he was doing so. Believe me, I know that there are many other reasons people use for their choice to divorce. Secondly, I don’t see myself differently from all the others (including yourself) as to sticking to my opinion (unless it changes) on any of these threads. You are welcome to your opinion as is everyone else here. I guess you are saying that you would rather I post once per thread and not come back to respond to others who have either commented directly on what I said, or that I can’t come back to make comments on new posts. If that’s the rule, just let me know and I’ll adhere to it.



Obviously, forums create there own dynamic differently that personal contact, but I have never been accused of being judgmental and uncompassionate by anyone I have counseled in over fifteen years. It is possible that you are reading something into what you read that I am not saying. I have stated that marriage and family are my greatest passions and I believe that the Lord has gifted me for this ministry, so no; I won’t stop communicating what it is that I believe the Lord is giving me to say. I often check and double check myself, and ask the Lord if this or that is true, or should I respond, so I attempt to be very sensitive and Holy Spirit controlled in almost all of my posts. If you feel content in your decisions and positions, I’m not here to change that. I am, however, here to answer others questions to the best of my knowledge and ability.



I am walking in the shoes of many who have posted to the marriage and divorce forum as we speak, so I am quite familiar with the pain and confusion that goes along with the immense challenges that can be faced in a marriage. My father was divorced four times, my mother once, and my sister is currently separated, so I am very close to this issue and I try to be very close to the heart of God. I know that what we are all going through breaks His heart and it breaks my heart as well. I have had numerous messages, both posted openly and in PMs, that have said how much I have touched them, how compassionate I have been, how much they have appreciated my comments, etc., so I’m not going to allow you to stop me from helping so many people. I am not judging anyone on here, only God can, and will, do that for all of us. I am sorry that you are so torqued by some of my posts. If them make you feel uncomfortable, rest assured that they are not aimed at you and please just read past them, so others can comment or get what they need, or want from them. You seem to have a lot of bitterness toward me and I have done nothing to you. Again, I am sorry if I have offended you in any way, as this has never been my intent…Michael

 

[heartnsoul]

If your wife has had an affair, and left you, you have every right to get a divorce. In the event that that is your decision, I would suggest waiting a bit for a few reasons:
1. You will need time to heal
2. You don't want someone else coming in with a 'saviour mentality'
3. Hindsight is not 20/20, that's a fallacy. We tend to remember in good light or in the most benificial light to us.
4. Until you are divorced, you are still married. Don't try and ignore this or justify any actions that are contrary to what a married person will do. You are responsible for your integrity, not your wife's.
5. Take a honest evaluation of your life. This part sucks, but I don't believe it's ever totally one persons fault for a divorce.

cbudc, I think the above post is great advice. Jumping from one relationship to another is probably not a good idea. Keep praying for your wife and let her know how much you love her and want to work things out with her. I know you are probably feeling a lot of pain right now and don't feel like talking to her. Let *her* be the one to decide to divorce, if that is what ends up happening. If nothing else, you should give your 110% to your marriage so you won't have regrets later. Also ask God to examine your own heart...see if there may be some lesson for you to learn from all of this. From my own experiences, there is always something to be learned--even through bad times. Hang in there. We will all be praying for you and your wife. No matter what the outcome, know that God will always love both of you and will never leave you. Keep the faith.

 

[heartnsoul]

heartnsoul… First of all I think we may have a misunderstanding of what I was referring to. Biblically, Christ said is was permissible for a man to divorce his wife for sexual uncleanness, but that is was due to hardness of heart that he was doing so. Believe me, I know that there are many other reasons people use for their choice to divorce. Secondly, I don’t see myself differently from all the others (including yourself) as to sticking to my opinion (unless it changes) on any of these threads. You are welcome to your opinion as is everyone else here. I guess you are saying that you would rather I post once per thread and not come back to respond to others who have either commented directly on what I said, or that I can’t come back to make comments on new posts. If that’s the rule, just let me know and I’ll adhere to it.



Obviously, forums create there own dynamic differently that personal contact, but I have never been accused of being judgmental and uncompassionate by anyone I have counseled in over fifteen years. It is possible that you are reading something into what you read that I am not saying. I have stated that marriage and family are my greatest passions and I believe that the Lord has gifted me for this ministry, so no; I won’t stop communicating what it is that I believe the Lord is giving me to say. I often check and double check myself, and ask the Lord if this or that is true, or should I respond, so I attempt to be very sensitive and Holy Spirit controlled in almost all of my posts. If you feel content in your decisions and positions, I’m not here to change that. I am, however, here to answer others questions to the best of my knowledge and ability.



I am walking in the shoes of many who have posted to the marriage and divorce forum as we speak, so I am quite familiar with the pain and confusion that goes along with the immense challenges that can be faced in a marriage. My father was divorced four times, my mother once, and my sister is currently separated, so I am very close to this issue and I try to be very close to the heart of God. I know that what we are all going through breaks His heart and it breaks my heart as well. I have had numerous messages, both posted openly and in PMs, that have said how much I have touched them, how compassionate I have been, how much they have appreciated my comments, etc., so I’m not going to allow you to stop me from helping so many people. I am not judging anyone on here, only God can, and will, do that for all of us. I am sorry that you are so torqued by some of my posts. If them make you feel uncomfortable, rest assured that they are not aimed at you and please just read past them, so others can comment or get what they need, or want from them. You seem to have a lot of bitterness toward me and I have done nothing to you. Again, I am sorry if I have offended you in any way, as this has never been my intent…Michael

Michael, I have no bitterness towards you. When you say that a lot of people have been touched by your comments...that's great. May I also say that a lot of people have been touched by *my* comments and *other people's* comments too. So it's just not *you only* who gives good advice. If you feel a need to send numerous emails to prove your point, then so be it. It is your way of helping others. I just wanted to bring to your attention that others have their own ways to help too. Your walk and your advice is not the only *right* way. Maybe we just have a misunderstanding. I am also sorry if I may have misread you. All of us on this forum need to respect one another and respect each other's walk with God. One walk is not superior over another's walk. We're all on different walks in our spiritual journey with God. My hope is that everyone finds his/her own relationship with God and realize how much God loves us. God bless all.

 

[mghalpern]

Michael, I have no bitterness towards you. When you say that a lot of people have been touched by your comments...that's great. May I also say that a lot of people have been touched by *my* comments and *other people's* comments too. So it's just not *you only* who gives good advice. If you feel a need to send numerous emails to prove your point, then so be it. It is your way of helping others. I just wanted to bring to your attention that others have their own ways to help too. Your walk and your advice is not the only *right* way. Maybe we just have a misunderstanding. I am also sorry if I may have misread you. All of us on this forum need to respect one another and respect each other's walk with God. One walk is not superior over another's walk. We're all on different walks in our spiritual journey with God. My hope is that everyone finds his/her own relationship with God and realize how much God loves us. God bless all.

heartnsoul... Amen...Michael

 

[cbudc]

cbudc, I think the above post is great advice. Jumping from one relationship to another is probably not a good idea. Keep praying for your wife and let her know how much you love her and want to work things out with her. I know you are probably feeling a lot of pain right now and don't feel like talking to her. Let *her* be the one to decide to divorce, if that is what ends up happening. If nothing else, you should give your 110% to your marriage so you won't have regrets later. Also ask God to examine your own heart...see if there may be some lesson for you to learn from all of this. From my own experiences, there is always something to be learned--even through bad times. Hang in there. We will all be praying for you and your wife. No matter what the outcome, know that God will always love both of you and will never leave you. Keep the faith.

See this is where I get confused. My wife is back in the states and I"m still overseas so we're not physically together. I read the book love must be tough and I feel after reading that that I should step back and give her her space. I don't feel like emailing her all the time to tell her I love her so much and want this marriage to work is making me look good let alone helping the situation. She knows I love her very much. I poored my heart out to her on her birthday last Sunday and didn't get much of a reply. Just to tell me what she got and all. I want my marriage to work so desperately and I do believe God can work miracles if we trust in Him to do so. I'm hoping a praying that He does.

So I'm just confused on weather or not I should email her and all and tell her I love her or if I should just back off. If I email her and tell her I love her then she may get the feeling that I'll always be there and she can continue with this "relationship" she has with this other guy. But yet at the same time I feel that if I stop talking to her then she will feel I don't care and start to get used to me not talking to her and that will lead her even more into this other guys arms. So confusing. Life can be hard. I'm trying so hard to put my faith in the Lord and I am. I love God and I know he will work his Will. Thanks for all the advice. If you have anything else for me please by all means let me know.

 

[Leanna]

cbudc, I had an affair. You remind me of my husband.

On the subject of the exgirlfriend. Don't talk to her. Don't talk to her. Even if you must stay alone.

My husband and I were separated for more than 6 months. While we were apart I was with another man. He was hurting too. The biggest mistake he made was trying to smother me. Later, he backed off. He stopped being an emotional mess begging. We started spending time together doing fun things, and he didn't comment on the other guy. That is who he won me back, by winning me back. Not begging. She knows how you feel, now stand up and be a man. Give her a little bit of space and time, but find it within you to spend time with her doing things you can do together without nagging her about her past or present. Don't think about it. God can heal your relationship. I hear there is a book on this concept, Love Must be Tough by Dr. Dobson, but I haven't read it yet! Maybe soon. Let me know what you think...

 

[seekfirst]

I"m not going to get back with my ex. In fact I prayed last night and I've decided that it's best I just don't talk to her right now.

Yes, I love my wife and I do want to reconcile this marriage but she doesn't. I can't do anything about that. I've already wrote her a thousand times and told her how much I love her and want our marriage to work. I feel like I'm the one who messed up and beggin for forgiveness. Not anymore. That's rediculous. She knows how much I love her and want to be with her yet she doesn't seem to want to come back. So what am I supposed to do? Wait for the rest of my life to come back to me? No. I'm sorry I'm not doing that and I don't believe that God wants me to wait around my whole life for her. I am being paitient. I'm trying ever so hard. I prayed last night for the Lord to speak to me. Well in a way I felt He did. Maybe it's not but this is what happened.

Basically I had a dream about my wife and we were running around on base here and we went to the library where everything came out and I told her I forgave her and that it was ok. Then we walked out and she fell to her knees and asked for forgiveness and asked me never to leave her. Later in the dream we had gone to a Christmas party at one of our friends house from LR and as I was saying hi to everyone there was an older man that came up to me said hello steve, and i said I'm sorry i don't know you. he said, i'm the savior and kissed me on the cheek and left. It hit me this morning when i was getting ready for work. I'm not sure if that's the Lord speaking to me but I sure felt like it to me. I don't know? You think I"m crazy?

I want my wife back very much and I know the only way it will work is through the Lord and I've turned myself around and trusted Him a lot more than I did in the past. I want His will to be done. Thanks everyone.

Although I didn't committ adultery, I did leave my marriage...and I was never going to go back. I was bitter, angry, hurt, and hard-hearted. Then....I started seeking what God had for my life...and first step...I forgave my ex-husband. After that...I started seeking the truth about divorce/remarriage....and my heart started to soften...Now...I am believing for my marriage to be restored...we have a lot that we have to grow through before we will be back together..but I do believe it will happen. I'm telling you all of this to help you realize that although your wife doesn't want to get back together right now... that doesn't mean that she won't turn her life around, and see her wrong in all of this. My prayers are with you...give God time to work with her. Don't set a time limit. In the meantime..you seek God, and His wisdom, and do your own growing...find out where you may have went wrong, and learn how you can be the husband you are suppose to be. No doubt, your relationship with God will grow stronger, and you will be blessed no matter what happens. big (((hugs)))