How to handle and not judge my sister.

[LoricaLady]

If one studies the characteristics of people with narcissistic personality disorder, as can be found on YouTube, and other places online, there would be an exact description of my sister.

She takes sadistic delight in trying to get people upset. There are no family members who have anything to do with her, except me. And I’m only hanging in there because I’m a Christian. She plays idiotic four year old mind games, just to be annoying. She lies pathologically. She gaslights.

I have minimal, but generally civil, interaction with her, while knowing that she is always going to be trying to find someway to make me feel bad.

I need divine guidance and grace to know how to interact with her without letting her hurt me.

 

[RileyG]

May God bless you with his peace

 

[William J]

I pray that God would grant you wisdom for how to interact with your sister in a way that shows mercy while simultaneously protecting you from her manipulation.

 

[ChildofGod222]

Prayers

 

[linux.poet]

Dear Lord, I pray for You to strengthen the woman's heart, that a firm hand of discipline and strength of mind may be given to her in the Holy Spirit. Help her to not reward this woman for her manipulative behavior, and to instead show her that her manipulative behavior will not give her what she wants. I praise you for the spiritual courage you have given to LoricaLady; please help her to persevere. In Christ's Name, Amen.

 

[St_Worm2]

If one studies the characteristics of people with narcissistic personality disorder, as can be found on YouTube, and other places online, there would be an exact description of my sister.

She takes sadistic delight in trying to get people upset. There are no family members who have anything to do with her, except me. And I’m only hanging in there because I’m a Christian. She plays idiotic four year old mind games, just to be annoying. She lies pathologically. She gaslights.

I have minimal, but generally civil, interaction with her, while knowing that she is always going to be trying to find someway to make me feel bad.

I need divine guidance and grace to know how to interact with her without letting her hurt me.

Hello LoricaLady, I'm very sorry to hear this about your sister, but I know your pain. My sister sounds like she could be a twin with your sister (narcissistically speaking anyway), but unlike you and your sister, we have parted ways (at her insistence .. a story that I would be willing to discuss further with you via PM, if you'd care to, but that I do not want to discuss further here).

Praying for you (and for her).

God bless you!!

--David
p.s. - I've talked to many people with narcissistic family members over the last 3 decades, and most have found that separating from their narcissist family member ended up being necessary, either partially or completely.

 

[LoricaLady]

Hello LoricaLady, I'm very sorry to hear this about your sister, but I know your pain. My sister sounds like she could be a twin with your sister (narcissistically speaking anyway), but unlike you and your sister, we have parted ways (at her insistence .. a story that I would be willing to discuss further with you via PM, if you'd care to, but that I do not want to discuss further here).

Praying for you (and for her).

God bless you!!

--David
p.s. - I've talked to many people with narcissistic family members over the last 3 decades, and most have found that separating from their narcissist family member ended up being necessary, either partially or completely.

I do understand why the general advice for those with narcissistic family members is to go no contact. Of course sometimes that’s not possible. And sometimes it isn’t what the Lord wants. He doesn’t want it for me or my sister. He wants me to hang them there, without being abused, And show love through his love.

I have seen studies that strongly indicate that narcissistic personality disorder is due to a deficiency of cortex in the empathy area of the brain. And there are studies indicating that it is hereditary. I can sure believe it is hereditary because it runs through my family.

I have seen family members acting like other family members with the disorder, when they have had virtually no contact with one another, or similar upbringings.

I have come to see NPD
as a kind of handicap, which is not visible , but terrible anyway.

 

[Hannah66]

I am sorry. I am battling a very similar situation with my sister. My sister is a christian but possesses a critical spirit.

 

[Paulus59]

If one studies the characteristics of people with narcissistic personality disorder, as can be found on YouTube, and other places online, there would be an exact description of my sister.

She takes sadistic delight in trying to get people upset. There are no family members who have anything to do with her, except me. And I’m only hanging in there because I’m a Christian. She plays idiotic four year old mind games, just to be annoying. She lies pathologically. She gaslights.

I have minimal, but generally civil, interaction with her, while knowing that she is always going to be trying to find someway to make me feel bad.

I need divine guidance and grace to know how to interact with her without letting her hurt me.

My oldest brother is the same and I am the only one in my family who has anything to do with him, but I haven't heard from him since Christmas since he got angry with me over the phone because I don't respond to his gaslighting or nonsense, but I am here for him if he wants to phone me and he knows that, I won't chase after him and play his games. All we can do is be firm with these people and show them kindness too and not let them walk over us and most important is that we are a light in their dark world and maybe they can see hope through love. Christ is the ONLY one that can heal them so hopefully they can see Christ in us with our kindness & compassion and seek him out. It's so good that you are there for your sister and that you extend God's love to her with your tolerance & kindness, but I hope you are able to get to that stage where no matter what she says it wouldn't affect you or upset you in anyway. You have to learn to detach yourself from these people emotionally so they don't hurt you. May God bring you there LoricaLady.

 

[brinny]

Praying.