How many CF members does it take to change a light globe?

[Spiritlight]

This is just for fun.

One to start a thread stating Jesus is the light of the world and no further change is needed.

One to question the ethics of modern day light bulbs in the bible.

Add yours..

 

[rockytopva]

If E = mc2 then we can divide and conclude that...

Mass (m) = Energy (E/c2)

And there are three varieties...

Natural E/c2 - All mass is basically cooled plasma
Mental E/c2 - Our brains output is a result of E/c2
Spiritual E/c2 - E (motivation, love) / c2 (faith, hope, charity, joy)

In order to fill the CF bulb with light takes many CF members posting things that make the light bulb of spiritual variety shine brightly.

 

[Spiritlight]

one member to start a thread to determine if it is a sin to continue living in the dark.

 

[Goodbook]

One to say we dont need to change it just dont hide it under a bushel.

 

[Dave-W]

we can break it down by denomination. My BIL sent me this back in 2004.

Charismatic: only one. Hands are already in the air.

Pentecostal: 10. One to change the bulb and nine to pray against the spirit of darkness.

Presbyterians: none. Lights will go on and off at predestined times.

Catholics: none. they only use candles.

Baptists: about 15. One to change the bulb, and three committees to approve the changes and decide who brings the salad and fried chicken.

Episcopalians: 3. One to call the electrician, one to mix the drinks and one to talk about how much better the old one was.

Mormons: 5. One man to change the bulb and four wives to tell him how to do it.

Unitarian: We choose not to make a statement either in favor of or against the need for a light bulb. However, if in your own journey you have found that light bulbs work for you, you are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about your light bulb for the next Sunday service, in which we will explore a number of light bulb traditions, including incandescent, fluorescent, 3-way, long-life and tinted, all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence.

Methodists: Undetermined. Whether your light is bright, dull or completely out, you are loved. You can be a light bulb, turnip bulb, or tulip bulb. Bring a bulb of your choice to the Sunday lighting service and a covered dish to pass.

Nazarene: 6. One woman to replace the bulb while five men review the church lighting policy.

Lutherans: none. Lutherans do not believe in change.

Amish: What's a light bulb?

 

[Goodbook]

messianics - not on the sabbath.
All the other days, we can change.
But one rabbi pipes up shouldn't we be using our menorah? Its not supposed to run out.

After much debate and arguing, they decide to leave it and only use the menorah instead.

 

[Goodbook]

Atheists - can't you ask your God to do it for you?

Agnostics - what light bulb? I can't see what you mean.

Pagans - our lighting ceremony needs at least 10 people to sit in a circle, pass a peace pipe and drum our drums. All hail the light bulb and the divine light within.

 

[Goodbook]

Salvation army - donations of new lightbulbs are appreciated. We are going to do a mass lightbulb change across all our churches, so we need as many people as possible. So at least a hundred in our corps.

 

[Spiritlight]

2 Old ladies to bake biscuits to fund raise for a new light bulb.

One catholic to clean it with holy water.

One CF moderator to check the light bulb is truly Christian and select an appropriate discussion section.

 

[Goodbook]

Megachurch - it takes the sound and lighting team about a week to replace the lightbulb with strobe lights and smoke machine instead. Then in the next megachurch service its announced everyone contributed to the lightshow with their tithes and offerings.
Now the megachurch is lit up, it can have three night time services each week.

 

[Spiritlight]

It would take 4 republican and democrat voters to Claim their candidate has the best light globe policies.

 

[zippy2]

good stuff guys!

Church of Christ.....(1-500)we can change the light bulb, but only while singing This Little Light of Mine, A cappella.

 

[mnorian]

This is just for fun.

One to start a thread stating Jesus is the light of the world and no further change is needed.

CF Christian members? God has already done it; as He said in Genesis 1:3 "Then God said, “Let there be light”; and there was light." Praise the Lord!

 

[Dave-W]

good stuff guys!

Church of Christ.....(1-500)we can change the light bulb, but only while singing This Little Light of Mine, A cappella.

Of course A cappella.

Actually - in the CoC I attended they sang "Pass it on."

It only takes a spark
to get a fire going
And soon all those around
can warm up in its glowing
That's how it is with God's love .......

 

[Aryeh Jay]

I don’t know. I have high intensity LED “bulbs” with a 500,000 hour life (57 years if left on 24/7).