Now I am getting confused. First you say that you cannot have any spiritual awareness without being touched by God’s spirit, and then you say that people of other faiths or none do have spirituality. And they do. They are spiritually aware. They may not know the power of the Holy spirit in their lives, but they still have spiritual awareness. My point is that unlike these non-Christians, I do not have any kind of spiritual awareness.
I believe the Bible teaches that the "spiritual awareness" of those who are not truly born again is merely an imitation of the real thing. But perhaps "awareness" isn't the best term to use. I used it mainly because it was a term you had used, though I think a better way of describing what I mean is "life." I think people can be aware that there is a spiritual dimension that exists to life, but their experience of that dimension in its fullest, deepest sense - in the way God describes in His Word - is not possible apart from God's regenerating work in a person's life. No matter how seriously or sincerely someone may approach the matter of their own "spirituality," without God's power bringing them alive spiritually, all they are doing, essentially, is going through the motions. They may meditate, and engage in ascetic practices, and fool about with crystals, but all of this stuff, in the end, is just dead ritual.
You do have some spiritual awareness. That you are on this forum writing about your lack of it is testament to this fact. You are aware, at least, that there is a spiritual life that you are without.
I thought I was born again, in 1974. But it made no difference to me.
If it "made no difference" to you, then obviously you weren't truly born again. If the Holy Spirit of the God of the Universe really comes to reside within you, you cannot be the same. This has been my experience and the experience of countless other genuine Christians. This is also the teaching of the Word of God. God's Spirit necessarily has a transforming effect upon the believer; change is inevitable, if His Spirit truly lives within a person.
Your assumption that I will only come to God on my terms is quite wrong. If you knew the whole context of my search for God, you would understand.
I can only respond based upon what you have told me, not what you haven't.
It is my assessment of my lack of knowledge of God that has made me wonder if the problem is my total lack of spiritual awareness. Maybe it is something else that is preventing me from knowing God. The trouble is, I have no idea what is preventing me from knowing God, and at the moment I am investigating the possibility that it might be a lack of spiritual awareness. To put it another way, maybe the reason why I am not aware of God is because I am spiritually blind, or whatever. But if I can find a different reason, and can do something to rectify the situation and find a way to get closer to God, then I will do it.
The Bible tells us that a person who is not genuinely saved
is spiritually blind.
2 Corinthians 4:3-4
3 But even if our gospel is veiled, it is veiled to those who are perishing,
4 whose minds the god of this age has blinded, who do not believe, lest the light of the gospel of the glory of Christ, who is the image of God, should shine on them.
Revelation 3:17
17 Because you say, 'I am rich, have become wealthy, and have need of nothing'--and do not know that you are wretched, miserable, poor, blind, and naked--
Acts 28:26-27
26 saying, 'Go to this people and say: "Hearing you will hear, and shall not understand; And seeing you will see, and not perceive;
27 For the hearts of this people have grown dull. Their ears are hard of hearing, And their eyes they have closed, Lest they should see with their eyes and hear with their ears, Lest they should understand with their hearts and turn, So that I should heal them."
Every person contends with three prime enemies to faith in God: The World, the Flesh, and the devil. These things typically work in tandem to blind a person to the spiritual truths and life God offers. Fortunately, God is able to overcome them all.
I think that the biggest barrier to faith is usually a person's own self-interest, controlled by the desires of the Flesh. Coming to a saving faith in Christ is a kind of exchange: your old, sinful life for a new, holy life in Christ. God intends to do away with Self, the source of Sin, altogether and in its place form in us the character of His Son, Jesus. The process to this end requires that the person under "reconstruction" die to themselves, to their ambitions, to their own self-will and submit completely to God. Often what was once cherished and valued by the individual must be spurned in favour of what God wants. This necessary death to Self, this crucifying of the Flesh, is the biggest hurdle most people face in coming to God. We are not naturally willing to give up what we want. We don't like the prospect of Another taking the controls of our life and steering us where we may not want to go. God be thanked, however, that He is greater than Self and, as unruly and powerful as it may be, He is able to free us from its grip.
I repeat, I did have faith. But I still had no spiritual awareness. For me, spiritual awareness did not come after I exercised faith in Christ.
What do you think "spiritual awareness" should be, exactly? As I pointed out above, you
are aware of a spiritual life that God offers...
In what, precisely, did you have faith?
Different Christians seem to believe that different things can help a person to know God better. That is why I listed the “religious activities.”
It sounded to me like you were saying that you had tried these things in an effort to connect with God. Now, however, it sounds as those you were merely giving a list of things you expect Christians would tell you are necessary for spiritual life. So, which is it? Did you do the things you described in an attempt to find God? Or was your list merely what you expected Christians would tell you to do to find Him?
What does it mean to ask Jesus into my life? I was thinking of what some Christians call the sinner’s prayer. Asking for forgiveness. Handing my life over to God. Believing that I was saved.
Simple phrases to write, but not so simple to do. Just from what you've written so far it seems to me that you haven't actually believed you were saved. Many people expect that upon being saved there will be some ecstatic moment, or some sudden, profound sense of an inward change. But this isn't what the Bible promises anyone. Believing is an
act of the will - or it should be. Christians are to stand upon the truth of the Word of God and nothing else. Neither feelings, nor experience are the basis for Christian life and faith. Only the Word of God stands sure and is the foundation upon which our faith in God finally rests. Expecting and desiring some "spiritual awareness" as proof of what God says is true is to not trust His Word. God intends that if all you have as the basis for your faith is His Word, that you will trust it nonetheless.
John 20:29
29 Jesus said..."Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed."
That is certainly the standard Christian response, that emotions are changeable but faith should be constant. In my case I cannot possibly base my faith on emotions or feelings, because I do not have emotions and feelings.
You seem to be having feelings about your lack of "spiritual awareness"...
Is there something wrong with a "standard Christian response"?
I have asked for God to be revealed to me. In whatever way God chooses to reveal. But nothing has happened.
Yes, actually, it has. God
has revealed Himself to you and to all people: First and foremost in His Word and then also through what He has made. As far as God is concerned, in these two things you have all the revelation of Him that you need. Now, you may say, "It isn't enough." Well, God says it is. What will you choose to believe? Yourself or Him? The Christian life is, at its core, choosing, in spite of what you may feel or think, to believe God.
I prayed for forgiveness and to be accepted as a Christian. I have no idea if God has answered that prayer.
If you asked sincerely, then God's Word says you are forgiven. If you "have no idea" that you are really forgiven, then your problem isn't with actually being forgiven, but of taking God at His Word. He said it; you believe it. Its that simple (and yet, not so simple!

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