High Functioning Autism

[Kathleen111]

Go Bethshaya!! I totally agree. If there is a school around with autistics and nothing but autistics, I recommend it. We know each other, understand each other, learn from each other, and support one another. It's really hard after spending the first 18 years of being marginalized and bullied to assimilate. It was overwhelming joy when I first went to an AS/HFA support group. Of course, we don't have animated, exagerated, or feigned emotions but wow, it was wonderful to see other people like me, all around. We read and relate to each other like books, for once, instead of what is that? why am I so different? why is it that no matter how I try nobody understands me? That's hard enough to deal with, but for a kid, it's extra hard.

 

[uniquetadpole]

I am AS. And I was diagnosed only a few months ago...and I am 35.

Most people find it hard to believe but I do have a speech problem...but not a delay. I have that correct grammer/pronunciation thing going on. But with me sometimes my words get stuck altogether. I think if I would have had a stutter life would have been easier...because then someone would understand. I have tried to explain it so many times...but all I get is the old..."yeah, sometimes I can't think of what to say either"...this is not what I am talking about...I get that too...but I literally have a brain fart in between my thought to speak and my lips forming the words. Everyone just thought I was quiet and shy...when in reality...I was actually a motor mouth inside...the words would just not be heard...I would carry on conversations with someone...and they would not respond...and I thought I was just being ignored...until I realized that I had said nothing. I would try again and still nothing...the worst was when I responded to someone else and nothing comes out and the other person gets upset and says "well, are you going to answer me" and all I can do is sit there and stare. So I am not so sure that Aspies don't have speech problems...just that they may be hidden more.

Tad

 

[aspie2x]

I'm HFA. Lower IQ? HFA/AS/LFA are all on a spectrum so each can be at a different point. Intelligence, personality, etc...are all different.

My Mom used to play records and the radio, to practice singing along to help with the speech delay. Dancing to help with spatial tripping over air difficulty. My Mom DID NOT enroll me in chorus or dance school where'd I'd a died from social difficulty. We just did that at home, and I always had records, radio, and enough floor space in my room. HFAs can absorb a lot, trying to express it is a whole other matter. HFAs are the ones we hear about moving along the spectrum too, like from LFA to HFA. Seeming to be "cured" but we're not.

My parents were thrilled about enrolling me in regular school when I got "better." My speech and spatial improvement had a lot to do with my Mom, not the autistic school. As far as social activity, I would have preferred to stay with other auties, the normies were mean to me. I was placed in the gifted class so no offense but I understand mathematics better than most people. That was something again my MOM noticed and encouraged with advanced books and encylopedias in mathematics and science. No, I didn't like those cartoon books. What I called "real books." I liked text books. I really hated it when teachers would take credit and make me do things like school plays, which my Mom fought, and lost, so I projectile vomited all over the 1st to 3rd rows, until I mercifully passed out.

That's the long way of saying don't underestimate yourself and don't give other people more say than you have over your child.

Wow. That was real useful. We did the same thing, we enrolled him into mainstream as his language and social skills increased. He did ok for 1 yr but in year 4 (age 10) he has had a real hard time. His writing is poor and it hurts his hand so he doesnt like it much. I dont know if he even knows any of his times tables as he doesnt like doing "work" at home as it is for school.
He struggles alot with anxiety and get anxious over descion making amongst many other things.
How old are you? If thats not to rude to ask? I get worried because I dont see any an area which is his strength. He likes computers but cant read very well so he constantly needs help. His maths isnt good and even though he likes robots, he lives in an unreality of believing they are more than they are. HE cant understand that they are only machines. yet he doesnt learn facts or anything like what I see other Autistic children do.
I want him to achieve the most he can out of life and be happy. But it seems he spends more time being anxious and upset over which toy is his favourite and is it alrtight to have 2 favourite things etc.
Did you have interests as a child? Where you anxious? How can I be most encouraging to him? It is difficult when it appears that he is so behind his peers.
Thankyou for listening

 

[aspie2x]

KayD,

I can sure relate to that. It's difficult not to be able to express yourself in a way other people understand. Two HFAs can understand each other without saying a word. It's like we have our own language. English is not a first language for us and it is like learning a foreign language for us.

And I hope I'm not going too far but the world is a very scary place for us. We know we are not understood and we know people don't like us. It doesn't get any better either with learning the language. This world is extremely hostile to anyone who is different and we know we are different and we know it is hostile communication.

I used to think the same when my son was 4 and could not speak. I had this goal that If I can just get him to communicate all our troubles and his frustration would be over.
Dont get me wrong, at 5 as he began to talk and 6 as it improved there wasnt the constant tantruming that we had gone through for so long. However he still gets very frustrated as he knows he is different and that people dont understand him and infact that he doesnt understand them. He is anxious about choices and descions he makes always, as he is worried that it is not "OK" or good enough.
We have tried hard to accept him for who he is, the probleem is thagt society dictates how he should behave at 10, what he should pleay with and what sort of interests should he have. So if you have a very tall 10 year old, talking like an 8yr old behaving like a 6yr old and playing with teddies it is seen as unacceptable and he gets bullied.
The communication helps plenty, but after that comes a whole new set of problems but with God strength and wisdom from those who have gone before us on this path we will make it.